15 episodes

Christian podcast messages on dating, relationships, finances and marriage and life brought to you by Oasis- Singles.com Our mission at Oasis Christian Singles is to be a resource hub that provides loving and practical support for Christian Singles of all stripes We are partnering with hundreds of Christian singles ministries, pastors, counselors and singles like yourself to bring you practical stuff you can use.

Christian Advice for Single Christians Podcast David Butler @ Oasis-Church-NJ.com

    • Health & Fitness
    • 5.0 • 1 Rating

Christian podcast messages on dating, relationships, finances and marriage and life brought to you by Oasis- Singles.com Our mission at Oasis Christian Singles is to be a resource hub that provides loving and practical support for Christian Singles of all stripes We are partnering with hundreds of Christian singles ministries, pastors, counselors and singles like yourself to bring you practical stuff you can use.

    How to Prepare for Marriage: Christian Dating Tips

    How to Prepare for Marriage: Christian Dating Tips

    As a Single Christian man or woman, are you curious about how to prepare for marriage? The process of preparing for marriage can be a mix of excitement and nervousness. As someone who’s been in your shoes, I totally get it! In this article, we’ll explore some practical tips to help you get ready for the adventure of a lifetime.

    How to get prepared for marriage Steps



    * Know Your Identity 



    Before you can share your life with someone else, it’s essential to know yourself first.  If you are a single Christian, that means getting in touch with your true identity in Christ. ( Ephesians 1) Your value as a person is NOT in what you think about yourself, or what others think about yourself. Take some time to reflect on your values, goals, and priorities. What makes you tick? What are your dreams and aspirations? Understanding yourself better will not only make you a better partner but also help you find the right match.



    * Strengthen Your Faith



    As a single Christian, your faith is the foundation of your life. Strengthen your relationship with God through prayer, reading the Bible, and engaging with your church community. A strong spiritual foundation will guide you through challenges and enrich your future marriage.



    * Embrace Your Singleness



    Being single doesn’t mean you’re incomplete. Embrace this season and use it to grow personally, spiritually, and emotionally. Pursue your passions, travel, and build meaningful friendships. Remember, your singleness with contentment is a gift, not a waiting room.



    * Learn From Past Relationships



    If you’ve had previous relationships, maybe even some trauma from past relationships, take the time to learn from them. What worked? What didn’t? Were you in a toxic relationship? Reflect on the lessons you’ve gained, and let them shape your future decisions. Every relationship is a stepping stone to finding the right person.



    * Seek Wise Counsel



    Proverbs 15:22 says, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers, they succeed.” Talk to trusted friends, family members, or your pastor about your desire for marriage. Their insights and experiences can be invaluable in guiding your path.



    * Set Realistic Expectations



    Marriage is beautiful, but it’s also hard work. Don’t expect your partner to be perfect or your marriage to be a fairytale. There will be arguments and fights.  So be prepared for ups and downs and commit to working through challenges together. Realistic expectations pave the way for a stronger bond.



    * Identify Deal Breakers and Must-Haves



    Know your deal breakers and non-negotiables. While nobody is perfect, it’s crucial to establish core values you won’t compromise on. This clarity will help you avoid settling for someone who doesn’t align with your values. In this area, you should know the red flags of a dating relationship.



    * Grow Your Communication Skills



    Open and honest communication is the lifeline of any successful marriage. Practice active listening and expressing your feelings constructively. a href="https://christian-dating-service-plus.

    • 1 hr 1 min
    Christian Single Parents Advice For Every Single Christian Parent

    Christian Single Parents Advice For Every Single Christian Parent

    Christian single parents carry significant responsibilities and often face loneliness. Think about it. It can feel overwhelming to manage all the chores, attend to your children’s needs, and find time for personal well-being.

    In today’s world, single parenthood has become increasingly common, and the journey is seldom smooth. For Christian single parents, the task becomes even more significant as they seek to instill spiritual values while managing life’s challenges singlehandedly. This article will offer essential advice and strategies for Christian single parents to raise their children with faith, hope, and love, drawing inspiration from Biblical principles.

    Christian Single Parents stress



    Leaving dating aside, being a Christian single parent can be extremely stressful, both emotionally and physically. The number of single-parent households has surged in recent years, and this includes many single Christian parents. In fact, according to Pew Research, over 40% of US families are single-parent-led households. And many of these folks are single Christian parents.

    One of my friends who is a single parent dad to two minor children was discussing the possibilities of using an online Christian dating service. He stated, “Who has time for dating, and how would the kids handle that? No, with all my daily responsibilities I barely have time to use the bathroom! What I really need are some single parent stress reducers.”

     the Needs of Single Christian Parents

    Single Christian parents have overwhelming spiritual, emotional, and physical needs. Yet, polls also show they are one of the least likely groups to attend church. Why is this? Well, money-saving worries have led some single parents to work several jobs in order to make ends meet, and they simply do not have the time. Many others, however, feel excluded or stigmatized by the church, and so stay at home. In a nutshell, single parenting is stressful. Period.

    It is essential for churches to embrace and support single parents, demonstrating the love of Jesus through practical care. When the Scripture states that believers should care for the poor, the widows and the defenseless,  single parents are not too far removed. Churches and single-parent ministries have a great opportunity to show the love of Jesus in this area.

    Christian Single Parents Action Steps

    In the meantime, if you are a single Christian parent, and struggling with the burdens of life. let me remind you of  the following steps Christian single parents can take to help lessen the load of parenting:



    * Stop feeling guilty! You cannot do it all, no matter what that single-parent prayer says. So take a bow (you deserve it!) for the job you are doing and rest in the One who can do it all, and who wants to help you bear the load (Psalms 55:22, Psalms 91, 1 Peter 5:7).

    * Maintain Consistency: Being consistent helps create a stable environment for your children. This includes consistent discipline, routine, and values. Consistency isn’t synonymous with rigidity; it’s about providing a predictable environment where children feel secure. Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “There is a time for everything and a season for ev...

    • 6 min
    Learning How to Argue and Fight

    Learning How to Argue and Fight

    Learning how to argue and fight is the best dating tip we could give Christian singles. That may sound like whacky dating advice unless you know that the top reason both dating and married couples break up is a lack of communication in the area of conflict-resolution.

    This is very important, so let me reiterate this dating advice a different way: Learning how to fight and argue successfully is the best way to a lasting and happy dating and/or married relationship. Why? Because conflict in this life is inevitable, so you better learn how to deal with it.

    Single Christians who never learn the art of fighting and arguing will most likely fail in any romantic dating relationship they enter. This is true whether they seek a soulmate through an online Christian dating service such as eHarmony, or any other way.

    Additionally, ever met that dating perfect match who looked so good together, and claimed they never argued or fought? Don’t believe it.  They have common relationship problems too. That romance made in heaven will be headed south soon unless they acknowledge the reality of conflict and arguments, and learn how to fight.

    Whether you are a single person already dating or only hoping to, the following dating tips on learning how to argue and fight will be helpful:

    Learning How to Argue and Fight Fairly

    Dating Tip 1:

    Honestly and lovingly confront the problem, but leave out the personal attacks on your dating mate. If the argument or fight devolves into attacks on personhood, the battle (and possibly the dating relationship) has been lost.

    Adam did this in the Garden after God confronted him with the problem of eating forbidden fruit. Instead of honestly acknowledging the problem, he put personal blame on both Eve and God: “This woman you put here with me-she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate.” (Gen. 3:12)

    Honestly addressing conflict sometimes means swallowing our pride by admitting we are part of the problem. Ever wonder what God would have done if Adam honestly admitted his part?

    Dating Tip 2:

    Listen to what the other person is actually trying to communicate. That means having an earnest eye to eye contact as you open up your ears and heart because communication can take place verbally, by action or body language. So, it’s important that you understand all these forms.

    Many dating singles have a lack of communication in the area of conflict resolution because they’re too busy thinking about their argument respons...

    • 42 min
    How to Deal with Rejection as a Single Christian

    How to Deal with Rejection as a Single Christian

    Learning how to deal with rejection as a single Christian is very important. If you are a single Christian who recently got dumped, or been told by the other party that they don’t want to date you, this could be very painful. Dealing with feelings of rejection can be very difficult! In a previous article, we already mentioned how difficult it is getting over with unrequited love.

    Rejection is an inevitable part of life. As a single Christian guy or woman, it can be particularly challenging when faced with rejection in a  dating relationship, or dealing with the one who got away.  When rejection does occur,  it’s crucial to remember that God has a perfect plan for each of us, including our relationships. (Romans 8:28) By focusing on faith, self-reflection, and personal growth, you can navigate rejection and disappointment with grace and embrace God’s plan for your life. In this article, we will explore practical ways to deal with rejection as a single Christian, finding solace in God’s love and guidance.

    Dealing with rejection in singleness



    * Trust in God’s Timing:



    As a single Christian, it’s essential to trust in God’s perfect timing. Recognize that God’s plan for your life may not align with your own desires or expectations. Embrace the belief that God knows what is best for you, and if a relationship doesn’t work out, it is because He has something better in store. Stay patient, have faith, and trust that God’s timing is always perfect.



    * Seek Solace in Prayer:



    When faced with rejection, turn to prayer as a source of comfort and guidance. Pour out your heart to God, expressing your feelings of hurt and disappointment. Seek His wisdom and ask for strength to overcome the pain of rejection. Remember that God is always ready to listen and offer His peace that surpasses all understanding.



    * Focus on Self-Reflection:



    Use rejection as an opportunity for self-reflection and personal growth. Take the time to evaluate your own actions, attitudes, and expectations. Consider if there are areas in your life where you need to grow or improve. Use the experience of rejection as a chance to become a better version of yourself, aligning your character with the values and teachings of Christ.



    * Surround Yourself with Supportive Community:



    One of the most significant advantages of being part of a Christian community like a Christian Singles Group is the support it offers. Reach out to friends, family, or a church community that can provide encouragement, understanding, and prayer during times of rejection. Surrounding yourself with fellow believers can help lift your spirits and remind you that you are not alone in your journey.



    * Embrace Your Identity in Christ:



    Remember that your worth and identity as a single Christian are rooted in your relationship with Christ, not in any romantic connection. Embrace the truth that you are deeply loved by God, regardless of your relationship status. Cultivate a strong foundation of faith and self-love, understanding that your ultimate fulfillment comes from your relationship with Him.

    • 41 min
    How to Deal with Loneliness as a Single Christian

    How to Deal with Loneliness as a Single Christian

    Many single Christians have a difficult time on how to deal with loneliness. Singleness often is a companion to loneliness and depression. This is especially true in cases where the single person had suffered heartbreak over a recent dating relationship break up,  unrequited love, divorce or sudden loss of a loved one. Whatever the reason for loneliness, some singles feel as if their whole existence has become an empty and meaningless experience.

    My dear brothers and sisters, if you are suffering this kind of loneliness, there are several practical steps you can take to help ease your pain.

    7 Steps on how to cope with Loneliness

    Remember that God Knows Your Pain

    Sometimes we feel no one understands the loneliness we are suffering. But you are not alone in your loneliness because the Lord is with you. More than that, Jesus Himself suffered loneliness and rejection, and because of that is able to empathize and sympathize with your suffering (Hebrew 4:15,16). Go to Him in prayer, and He will meet you in your need.

    Keep Busy by Finding a Personal Hobby or Interest

    When we experience loneliness, it’s easy to want to isolate ourselves and go into a shell. But this only makes our loneliness and depression worse.

    Instead of retreating, make a schedule of your day, and chalk in some enjoyable activities to fill in your free time. Be creative, and try something new and exciting. You may not “feel” like doing this at first, but positive feelings will soon flow from your actions.

    Volunteer Your Time at a Charitable Organization

    One of the best thins you can do for how to deal with loneliness is ministering to others who are in need. I don’t understand it, but a certain level of healing occurs when we take our eyes off of ourselves, and reach out to others who are hurting.

    There are a huge number of worthwhile charitable organizations in the world. Volunteering at such places as a homeless shelter, World Vision, the Salvation Army or say, Habitat for Humanity, is a great way to show Jesus’ love in practical ways. It also helps takes our minds off our own problems while bringing us much needed contact with other people. It’s a win-win proposition.

    Join a Christian Support Group

    We all need a little help from time to time. Christian singles groups offer many benefits including great fellowship, spiritual guidance and loving support from singles who are probably going through similar struggles with loneliness. Many singles have also met their special soulmates through these types of groups. Finding one in your area of the world is as easy as doing a Google search. At Christian dating Service PLUS, we are actually in the process of listing every known Christian singles group under the sun, so if you have such a group let us know. 🙂

    If you have special needs, such as you have just suffered a divorce, or have lost a loved one, www.divorcecare.com and www.griefshare.org are international programs where you may find help.

    Embrace God’s Timing

    Remember that God has a perfect plan for your life, including your singleness. Trust in His timing and surrender your desires and expectations to Him. Recognize that being single allows you the freedom to fully devote yourself to God and serve Him wholeheartedly. Embrace the present moment and trust that God is working in your life.

    Seek Professional Help

    If feelings of loneliness persist and begin to affect your emotional well-being and daily functioning,

    • 33 min
    How to Stop Masturbating: A Christian Singles Perspective

    How to Stop Masturbating: A Christian Singles Perspective

    Wondering how to stop masturbating? In a world where the conversation around sexual purity and personal habits is often challenging to navigate, single Christians seeking to honor their faith while grappling with the natural tendencies of human sexuality can find themselves at a crossroads. Masturbation, a subject shrouded in taboo and often guilt, becomes a pivotal point of internal conflict. This article aims to shed light on how single Christians can approach the topic of masturbation with grace, understanding, and practical steps toward overcoming it.

    Understanding Masturbation in the Christian Context

    Masturbation is rarely discussed openly in Christian circles, leading many to struggle in silence. The Bible does not explicitly mention masturbation, leaving room for interpretation and personal conviction. However, the guiding principles of purity, self-control, and honoring God with one’s body (1 Corinthians 6:19-20) provide a framework for evaluating personal habits, including masturbation.

    Recognizing the Underlying Issues

    Often, the act of masturbation is not just about sexual gratification but is intertwined with deeper issues such as loneliness, stress, boredom, or the need for comfort. Addressing these root causes is a crucial step towards overcoming the habit. Engaging in prayer, meditation, and seeking counsel can help unearth and confront these underlying emotions in a healthy and constructive manner.

    Cultivating Healthy Outlets

    Redirecting energy and focus toward positive and productive activities can significantly reduce the temptation to masturbate. Whether it’s pursuing hobbies, physical exercise, volunteering, or deepening spiritual practices, finding meaningful outlets is essential. These activities not only enrich personal life but also build a sense of accomplishment and self-worth that goes beyond momentary pleasures.

    Accountability and Community

    One of the most powerful tools in overcoming any challenge is the support of a compassionate and understanding community. Seeking accountability partners or joining support groups within the church can provide the encouragement and perspective needed to navigate this journey. Sharing struggles with trusted friends or mentors who can offer prayer, advice, and accountability can make a significant difference in maintaining a commitment to purity.

    Embracing Grace and Forgiveness

    The journey towards overcoming masturbation, like any process of personal growth, is marked by setbacks and victories. It’s crucial to remember that God’s grace is sufficient in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9), and His mercy is new every morning (Lamentations 3:22-23). Practicing self-forgiveness and embracing God’s forgiveness are foundational to moving forward without being paralyzed by guilt or shame.

    Practical Steps to Avoid Temptation



    * Set Clear Boundaries: Identifying triggers and setting boundaries around media consumption, internet use, and even certain social interactions can help avoid situations that might lead to temptation.

    * Cultivate a Prayerful Life: Strengthening one’s relationship with God through prayer, Scripture reading, and worship can fortify the spirit against temptations.

    * Maintain a Healthy Lifestyle: Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and adequate sleep can improve overall well-being and reduce the urge to seek comfort in masturbation.

    * Seek Professional Help: For some, the struggle with masturbation may be tied to deeper psychological or emotional issues. Consulting with a Christian counselor or therapist can provide professional guidance and strategies for overcoming the habit.



    Conclusion to How to stop masturbation

    Overcoming masturbation as a single Christian is a journey that requires compassion, self-awareness, and a commitment to spiritual growth. By addressing the root causes, seeking support,

    • 4 min

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