Brenda grew up in a “sex silent” household and transitioned right into purity culture. For a naturally highly sexual person, this spelled dysfunction and disaster. She found her way out of abuse and repression, went through a period of intense exploration, and she is now an advocate and educator for other survivors of religious trauma. She shares her truth publicly and celebrates all of her experiences—even the “dark” ones, as they have anchored her learning along the healing journey.     Brenda Marie Davies is a 37-year-old cisgender woman. She describes herself as bisexual, open-minded, and single.  She describes her body as slim.   Book: On Her Knees: Memoir of a Prayerful Jezebel Website: www.godisgrey.com YouTube: www.youtube.com/godisgrey   THANKS TO OUR SPONSOR FOR THIS EPISODE: *** DIPSEA STORIES: go to www.dipseastories.com/goodgirls to get a 30-day FREE trial!   Bookmark moments: 3:47 - Brenda shares her first memory of sexual pleasure as early as age 3, rubbing on a couch and being redirected by her mother to do such in private. She grew up in what she calls a “sex silent” household, in which the sole sex discussion was an Oprah video about STD’s. 9:00 - Brenda talks about how being exposed to Evangelical culture in puberty impacted her actions and outlook. 12:51 - Brenda shares an early fantasy around a boy at school which became an ongoing ravishment fantasy to circumvent Evangelical strictures (even though it uses victim blame phrases like “cause a brother to stumble.”) 19:43 - She talks about how she got into purity culture. She was a late bloomer, still playing Barbies in a Britney world, and she thought it gave her some safety. It did not; predation and dysfunction just changed shape. 25:35 - Brenda meets her husband at age 21, on MySpace. 32:09 - Brenda shares the story of losing her virginity on purpose to a guy she didn’t plan to see again, her search through the Bible for sense, and her overlapping experiences with anorexia and a hymenectomy. Also, she ends up marrying him. 41:48 - Disembodiment is an issue, and weaponized scripture doesn’t help. She also describes a role-playing adventure which backfires, and the dissolution of her marriage. 51:45 - She opens up about having a forced abortion in the midst of an abusive relationship in the midst of an exploration spree. 57:23- Brenda talks about some of her sexcapades. 1:02:18 - Brenda is bisexual; she shares her Star Wars-related coming out story. 1:09:58 - Brenda catches us up to present day and being single, including her advocacy work and living in deep personal integrity.   The Lowdown: Brenda answers questions about having sex on her period, number of partners, race, sex toys, positions, initiating or not, active vs passive, c**t stimulation vs penetration, breast play, orgasming, g-spot, faking it, kinds of touch, hard red lines, porn, group sex, hair vs bare, blowjobs, swallowing, receiving oral, ass play, kink, dirty talk, laughter, confusing sexual urges, favorite body part, least favorite body part, sex life areas to improve, and old beliefs.   Patreon: All archived Good Girls Talk About Sex audio extras are now available for FREE!  They can be accessed at www.patreon.com/goodgirlstalkaboutsex.  I've done this because not everyone has the means to pay for access, and I know this additional material can be deeply important for some listeners. But creating this show isn't free, so if you’d like to support the work I do, I am grateful for your contributions at www.patreon.com/goodgirlstalkaboutsex.   BE PART OF THE SHOW: Rate this pod: Leave a rating and review at RateThisPodcast.com/goodgirls   Have a question or comment - Leave a voicemail for Leah at 720-GOOD-SEX (720-466-3739) - this is a voicemail-only line, so I promise you won't have to talk to someone in person!   Be a guest on the show - I'd love to talk with you! Fill out the form at www.leahcarey.com/guest   FOLLOW L