In this, their 100th episode and Season 3 finale, Greg and Patrick talk about the challenges and joys of a career in academia. Helping to ensure that we don’t let the bastards grind us down are the voices of three insightful assistant professors and three wonderful graduate students. Along the way, we also mention lining up the napkin, hug free zones, margarita night in 2003, relying on the kindness of strangers, Strunk & White voodoo, a mile-high C, Mr. October, going beyond the veil, the Black Plague, messages in bottles, the gates of the citadel, turning the container ship, work-work balance, being the bad guy, the focus groups in my head, 50cc of sodium phenobarbital, that’ll do pig, front wheel drive/rear wheel drive, and attaboys.