Thanks Trauma Thanks Trauma

I've always found myself guessing and assuming the emotions and feelings of others to keep myself safe. Growing up in a household where one parent always had unstable emotions and often blamed me for the things that happened in their life, I never knew what it was that I did wrong. I was always careful of my moves and what I said so I wouldn't upset them or trigger them in any way. This has moved into my close relationships as an adult and hasn't really worked out for me the way it used to.



In this episode, I get into breaking this habit and how I've stepped out of that unhealthy safety net and how you can too! 

In this episode, I talk about suicidal ideation and your thoughts being valid. I don't talk too much about my own experience but more so just my thoughts about having them and how I think it should be a bigger conversation. We are okay talking about those who have taken their own life but not those who want to or are planning to. That's not right. It's all valid. 

In this episode, I talk about why we fear abandonment and ways in which it shows up in our lives. I do focus on romantic relationships, as it relates back to my life, but you can have this fear in any relationship. Stopping yourself from spiraling during this cycle is hard, but it takes asking yourself "What would help me not feel abandoned?". Most times you just want to feel loved and feel confident in your close relationship. Embrace that! 

In this episode, I get into what codependency is and what it's like being codependent. For me, it's like getting into a relationship and throwing away all of my wants and needs without considering if who I'm is good enough for me. 

In this episode, I get into how worry and controlling behaviors give you a false sense of security and safety. It's common for trauma survivors to continue to create chaos or create the same outcome out of familiarity - although it might be more damaging in the long run. 

In this episode, I talk about the whether we should "blame" transgenerational trauma or our parents. I say, as long as you don't blame yourself and you do whatever helps you heal your inner child wounds. You weren't responsible for the things that happened to you as a child and no one should decide who is responsible for that, for you.
Books Mentioned:
"It didn't start with you: How inherited family trauma shapes who we are and how to end the cycle" - Mark Wolynn
"The boy who was raised as a dog" - Bruce D. Perry