Episodes
This episode starts off with a song from James. It’s quite the thing. James is here after a day of some quality DIY commitment, Sam is not loving beer, there’s carbonara chat and cannelloni yap too. This is followed up with some ‘reopening of the pubs’ discussion, Sam’s father in law’s digital sea sickness and the sad demise of Cafe Rouge. Before this week’s guest arrives there’s also some No Seat Christopher Nolan verbals and Sam has a weirdly erotic dream….. Praise be that aforementioned...
Published 07/07/20
This episode features Eddy Tejada and Matthew Scott from Hot 4 U creating a vast swathe of mouthsounds all about setting up their food delivery business in the midst of the pandemic. They talk learning on the job, friendly accountants, eight hundred potato bears and cooking from the hip. They also tell all about how they really need to start writing things down and buy a calendar. Before they arrive the weather is hot, the TickyOff Boyz still can’t agree on the future of Pidgin and Sam has...
Published 06/30/20
This episode of TickyOff features a third appearance by Will Beckett of the mighty Hawksmoor empire. Said steak and great service empire has, like other lesser empires such as The TickyOff Boyz meagre cut-rate ‘empire’, been shut for ages because of the goddamn coronavirus nightmare. Now however, Will and his bird of prey themed meat house gang are working on how reopen safely into the new world of hospitality. Will talks distancing, Hawksmoor At Home, masks, trying to stay optimistic, trust...
Published 06/25/20
Listen up listeners. This episode of the greatest podcast about food that humankind has ever even dreamed of is here. The gratitude y’all must/should have coursing through yer veins means there may not be room enough within those veins for blood! Be careful. If you feel lightheaded, lay down. If you die, lay down too. I guess you will lay down naturally to be fair, if you die. Anyway, don’t blame us. This episode features a second appearance by (possibly) Sam’s favourite person on earth...
Published 06/22/20
‘Hello, is it me you’re looking for?” So asked brother of Guy, Lionel Richie, in his 1964 hit cover of Adele’s ‘lover as ghost’ spooky hit song ‘Hello’. Now, Lionel R raises a more than interesting question here. It’s all a question of perception. Let’s start here: 1. Is the person you are looking for Lionel Richie? 2. Is the person you are looking for Margot Henderson? This gets more than complicated at this stage in that we now must consider whether Lionel is asking this question of...
Published 06/15/20
Hello. This is TickyOff. This is episode two hundred and forty four, If it was a fruit, this episode would be a peach fruit. Peaches are a very rare fruit which I believe is grown in cans. Peaches are also covered in the fur of human people. This fur is not harmless. It is sweet and delicious. Anyway, that’s peaches, this is TickyOff, which is also sweet and delicious and covered in human fur, but is not a fruit. It’s a podcast. Wake up. This episode features Katie and Rick Toogood, the...
Published 06/11/20
You weren’t expecting it. Neither were we. But here we are. Listening to a pretty sensible, serious, thoughtful episode of the generally wacky and dumb TickyOff. This episode features two guests, The Goddamn TickyOff Boyz. Said boyz of T’Off basically have a disagreement about the future of their business for forty odd minutes. James thinks Pidgin should be one thing. Sam thinks it should be a thing that is a different thing to the thing that James thinks it should be. Neither of them...
Published 06/08/20
This episode of TickyOff features chef, restaurateur, cookbook author and all round wonderful being of a human kind Ravinder Bhogal. Ravinder talks her initial breakthrough into the world of food, fighting for her restaurant site, supper clubs and pop ups and some dangerous geese in Kenya. She also gets into her celebration of immigrant foods, the mini economies that homesickness can create and some utterly life changing guava fruit. Before Ravinder arrives Sam shares a recipe for Big Tray...
Published 06/03/20
This episode of TickyOff features food writer and cookbook author Rachel Roddy Zooming in from Rome. Rachel has just had her first restaurant meal post-lockdown, explains all about a pet tortoise called Secret Agent and seemingly suggests that all Romans ever eat is tongue. Rachel also describes growing up in her Grandmother’s pub, a delightful town in Sicily famous for its oil refinery and discusses the similarities between Roman and British cuisine. Before Rachel roams in from Rome, James...
Published 05/29/20
‘Search for the hero inside yourself' sang M People on their third single from their multi platinum selling album ‘Bizarre Fruit’. Here at TickyOff Industries we’re not the sort to go around telling people what to do. If you want to listen to Heather Small’s instruction and look inside yourself somewhere for a hero then go right ahead. That’s your shout. We would gently suggest however that perhaps a hero can be located somewhere far more accessible, and lets be honest, more hygienically....
Published 05/26/20
This spectacular episode of The TickyOff features self confessed ‘anal pastry’ legend Calum Franklin of The Holborn Dining Rooms absolutely mouth-audioing all over the damn place about pies, craftsmanship, Ginsters, time pieces made of sausages and making many a pie to help the NHS. Calum also has no idea how old he is which may have something to do with the nature of chefs and their memories. Before the C-Frank shows James reads another highly erotic recipe from Barbara Cartland, is covered...
Published 05/22/20
Episode two hundred and thirty eight of the damn TickyOff is what they call a doozy. I am however concerned that I have no idea who they are and what exactly a doozy is. Anyway, it is what it is, just do it, I’m lovin’ it, etc. The T-Boyz begin irritated at tedious people and the low standard of pandemic gags on Twitter., James has a new bike and may have taken his children to a dogging spot. Sam meanwhile makes a ‘vegetarian’ kimchi jigae and buys some mashed potato. Then Phil Bracey...
Published 05/19/20
This episode of TickyOff is a true first for humankind. Unlike the moon landings and ventriloquism however, this is real. It’s the first transatlantic episode. That’s right. The TickyOff Two thumb their noses at many vast bodies of water, none more so than the Atlantic. They fling their mouthsounds from these foul green shores of Albion across that pathetic puddle of an ‘ocean’ and in return, from Gotham City aka NYC, they hear the mouthsounds of Youngmi Mayer, comedian and Mission Chinese...
Published 05/15/20
It’s been a tough week for the TickyOff Boyz with not a whole lot of positives to kick off with. However, things could well be looking up, James has some solo chop-time upcoming alongside a snack of squid. In other cephalopod news Sam heard rumour of some cuttlefish nearby but didn’t find them and instead spent too much money on tomatoes. Moving past these epic rubbery seafood tales they get to talking bookshelves and the books upon them. Sam bought a fine book from Alcatraz and James reads...
Published 05/11/20
Right, guess what? It’s still lockdown and jokers are still joking on with jokey joke sourdough. Therefore, The TickyOff Boyz decided as a public service to invite on a real bread whisperer to school you jokers. Martha Delacey (@marthadelacey) is here and she’s upending a yeasty, grainy, floury, rising, dutch oven full of bread related knowledge upon yr joker heads. Martha schools all on not following recipes, calming the hell down and her experiences setting up online classes during...
Published 05/06/20
The episode of TickyOff that lies before your ears contains four mouths. Two of these mouths belong to the TickyOff Boyz. One each. One apiece. The remaining two mouths belong to the TickyOff Boyz wives. You come to each episode of TickyOff searching for qualities you cannot find in other podcasts. Traits such as speedy wit, semi-raw sexuality, towering intelligence upon such subjects as ghosts and skillets. Some people would tell you that these things do not in fact exist upon, within,...
Published 05/03/20
The very definition of ‘scenes’ on this episode of TickyOff, Sam has grown a moustache. It is foul. Be grateful you cannot see it and only have to hear about it. Meanwhile, James has cooked a disappointing lunch, they both discuss a controversial article by chef Gabrielle Hamilton and Sam completely misunderstands the plot of ‘The Lion King’. Then author Evie Wyld arrives for her second appearance on the damn pod. Evie’s mouth creates noises which we, and you, interpret via human ears. These...
Published 04/30/20
Published 04/30/20
This episode of TickyOff features a second appearance by Tim Anderson, (@cheftimanderson) chef owner of Nanban and cookbook writer. Tim talks recording the Kitchen Cabinet during lockdown, using up strange flours in his pantry, and the benefits of laugh tracks. Tim also gets into disliking restaurant food despite being a restaurant owner, katsu sandos, caponata and selling his plasma to buy an iPod. Before Tim arrives, James tries to think of his five perfect films, attempts to film a potato...
Published 04/26/20
This episode of Thine TickyOff (we do it all for you because we are kind and generous) features Joe Warwick creating mouthsounds, with his mouth of all things. It’s quite the performance. Joe is fresh from a tricky Instagram Live debut with Rene Redzepi of Noma and Amanda Cohen of Dirt Candy in NYC. Joe makes it very clear that his appearance on TickyOff is a far greater honour than yapping it up with the ant man and the veggie botherer… Before Joe arrives, Sam ‘reveals’ he’s hungover and...
Published 04/23/20
This episode of The World’s Greatest and Most Popular Podcast Ever Made, Thee TickyOff, features Alex Andreou, writer, cook, man about Twitter and a whole bunch of other stuff no doubt. Alex calls in from Mykonos to discuss burning bread, elongating time, preparing snails for dinner, annoying Italians and some high grade tekkers on how to make a Greek burger. There’s also some very honest, and if I’m being honest, very moving, chat from Alex about caring for his mother in the late stages of...
Published 04/19/20
James has shaved his head. It looks decent. Sam has recently eaten a saveloy in a mildly disturbing manner. And with a foundation like that, how could The TickyOff Boyz fail to deliver yet another episode of podcastical genius? Spoiler alert, they don’t fail. It’s an absolute aural triumph that the world should be very grateful for indeed. Today they are ably assisted by food writer Jonathan Nunn. Jonathan discusses lockdown forcing him back into the kitchen, his fear of baking and how much...
Published 04/16/20
This Easter episode of Thee Most Holy TickyOff features a second appearance by chef and owner of King restaurant in NYC, Jess Shadbolt (@jessieshad) Jess is in lockdown in the wilds of Essex fighting over her mother’s stove, drinking lots of rose and watching Floyd get drunk across France in some relaxing British cookery television classics. Jess describes the coronavirus shutdown of NYC, how she’s trying to keep her business afloat, the coming together of the US hospitality industry and her...
Published 04/12/20
This was the last episode of TickyOff recorded within the hallowed walls of the hallowed TickyOff Towers. Said episode was recorded at the start of the coronavirus hell that we all find ourselves in. Please forgive any comments underestimating the challenge that would present itself to us all following this. We didn’t know. We ain’t Marty McFly. And James ain’t Doc Brown. Anyway, its a great damn episode. Sami Tamimi and Tara Wigley of the Ottolenghi empire are here to talk their new book...
Published 04/09/20
John Craven of 'Newsround' fame is sadly not on Thee TickyOff today. If I’m being entirely honest then I can’t remember why I named this episode ‘John Craven’. All I know is that John Craven is mentioned at some stage. I wonder how John Craven is. I hope he’s holed up with his loved ones and taking good care of himself. Great jumpers, great news related mouth sounds, great guy. Anyway, J Crave ain’t here but we have someone far better, Zoe Adjonyoh is here. Zoe utilises her mouth to create...
Published 04/05/20