The Not Safe For Mom Group Podcast www.notsafeformomgroup.com

Writer, author, and mom of three Sara Peterson has been down all the instagram wormholes and has lived to tell about it. On this episode, your host Alexis , and Sara have a super candid conversation on the ways in which performative motherhood and momfluencers are wearing us all down. Sara shares with us what it means to be a "hot mom", why prescriptive parenting doesn't work, the new mom haircut, and we also discuss . . . haunted Mormons (IYKYK). Sara's book, MOMFLUENCED, will be out this spring. We go deep into momfluencer culture in this episode, so here are a few articles to provide "supplemental reading":

Articles by Sara:
Momfluencer Culture Enrages Me: Why Can't I Look Away?Why I want to quit social mediaApparently makeup for children is just as much a thing as skincare for childrenWhy I’m struggling to explain my beauty routine to my 4-year-old daughterAlso discussed in the episode:
Mormon influencer exposes ‘soft swinging’ secrets on TikTok: ‘Everyone hooked up’Subscribe to Sara's Substack, "In Pursuit of Clean Countertops", here.
Poppyseed Health offers 24/7 on-demand text access to doulas, midwives, and nurses.

The National Council on Sexual Addiction Compulsivity has estimated that six to eight percent of Americans, and  approximately one in six women struggle with an addiction to pornography and sex. (Many women with sex addiction engage in casual sex, have multiple partners, or affairs. ) Author, and mom Erica Garza is one of the few women speaking out about her struggles with porn and compulsive masturbation (beginning at age 12), and later, sex addiction.  Her memoir, "Getting Off: One Woman’s Journey Through Sex and Porn Addiction" is a brave and eye-opening story that helps dispel myths and opens up a necessary conversation about addiction. On this episode of the podcast, Erica talks about the underlying anxieties that contributed to her addiction, the pain of living a secret life, and how she finally was able to experience pleasure without feelings of shame. Erica also shares how her former addiction informs how she parents her daughter, and offers tips for those who may be struggling with sex addiction and want to seek help.

Ways to get help:
Attend Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous which follows the 12 Step Model from Alcoholics AnonymousDisrupt unhealthy patterns by turning off your internet or traveling someplace newConnect with others who are working to recover from addiction (any kind)You can find her book here.
Poppyseed Health offers 24/7 on-demand text access to doulas, midwives, and nurses.

Keren Keyzner's daughter Lily was diagnosed with neuroblastoma on the evening of September 16, 2018, at 2.5 years of age. Neuroblastoma is an extremely rare form of cancer, with only about 700 new cases diagnosed every year in the United States.  In this episode, Keren shares her daughter's journey, and how Keren and her family coped with such unimaginable loss. If you've ever wondered how you could support friends and loved ones caring for a sick child, or who are mourning the loss of their child, give this episode a listen.  
Organizations to donate to/ learn more about pediatric cancer and neuroblastoma:
Candle Lighters: Local non profit that supports families coming to NYC to get treatments- they support the kids, parents and siblings!Band of Parents: Grassroots non profit started by parents of children with Neuroblastoma to raise funds for new treatments.Whip Pediatric Cancer: Another great org that raises money for childhood cancer at Sloan and supports families. Click here to see some images of beautiful Lily and read the poem Keren wrote for her funeral.
Poppyseed Health offers 24/7 on-demand text access to doulas, midwives, and nurses.

Today we have writer, and coach Jenn M. Choi on the podcast, who shares with us her story of surviving the deaths of both of her immigrant parents (on top of going through a huge life change) and how that process helped her face the generational trauma she'd held onto for so many years.  She talks about how she found self-compassion, how reframing healing is a constant process, and how we all have the tools we need within us to become "the moms we wish to be."

Listen to her expert suggestions on how to heal, and move through generational trauma in your own life, and how the ultimate self care is knowing that you need help and that you can't do it all alone:

Jenn's healing go-to's:
Mindset - Knowing to accept help. This is the first step: To get into the mindset of receiving help and saying, it is ok to not be ok, and I cannot do this alone.Therapy is one of the best tools in helping you not implode with feelings of rage. Finding the right modality of therapy and good chemistry with your therapist is essential.Coaching - therapy looks at present and past; coaching is more future focused.Writing - journaling helps you process and come up with things from your subconscious and bring it to light. Writing a letter to your past self can be very powerful.Online communities - going online and finding your community (FB, IG, Reddit’s sub communities).

Poppyseed Health offers 24/7 on-demand text access to doulas, midwives, and nurses.

"I could tell you maybe two people at my son's school know, and this is the crazy thing, maybe even more because I have been around people in those times I was using and you just don't think you look drunk. You did this, you forgot lunch, you did that, and who knows what people picked up on? My disease would lead me to believe they didn't at all, but I'm sure some people did."
In today's episode, we talk with someone who doesn't appear to be an "addict" but only because we have so many misconceptions of how an addict should look. An addict can be someone whose life has completely fallen apart, and it can also be the well-dressed mom at drop-off who is on her way to her C-suite office. Our guest tells us about the origins of her addiction, the career that helped fuel it, and how she has found recovery. She also talks about why she insists on considering herself an "addict" even though she is sober. We'll hear what it is like to parent while in recovery and how she talks to her child about her sobriety.
Resources for recovery:
Online Intergroup of Alcoholics AnonymousCaron.org

Poppyseed Health offers 24/7 on-demand text access to doulas, midwives, and nurses.

SEASON 2 PREMIERE! Today we are talking with award-winning author Angela Garbes, of LIKE A MOTHER: A Feminist Journey Through the Science and Culture of Pregnancy, and the just-released ESSENTIAL LABOR: Mothering as Social Change.  Her latest book reads like a manifesto for the kind of world we aspire to have for mothers and women and all caregivers, and  it asks the question, what if we built a system that lets us care for the people that actually care for us? How do we, in a society that is so detached from our bodies create a world where we value bodies, the human experience, and our right to pleasure?
We talk with Angela about:
how to establish a strong foundational understanding for our children that their bodies are worthy of love, and good care the responsibility parents hold for teaching our kids to respect all kinds of bodies, and that all bodies are differenthow to navigate talking about difficult topics (like bodies, sex, scary news) with our childrenthe benefits of intergenerational living, and caring for eldersreframing sex and pleasure for ourselves and our kidshow to reconnect sexually with a partner during/after periods of low libidoLIKE A MOTHER, is out now. Grab this must-read book here.

This episode is sponsored by Poppy Seed Health - 24/7 text access to doulas, midwives, and nurses.


Poppyseed Health offers 24/7 on-demand text access to doulas, midwives, and nurses.