Episodes
Todd and Cathy discussed the importance of developing talents and the challenges of pursuing one's passions. They also emphasized the need for understanding and empathizing when teenage boys lash out or question their belonging (they share an audioclip from Dr. John Duffy). They shared the difference between empathy and sympathy, and why it’s important to be really clear about what you need and ask for it. They ended the show by discussing the victim, villain, hero triangle and what it really...
Published 04/23/24
Cathy and Todd discuss the distinction between weaponized incompetence and regular incompetence, exploring how gender norms and societal expectations shape these ideas. They engage in real-time reflection on how they navigate these dynamics within their partnership and parenting, and they stress the need for communication and flexibility depending on the situation. This is a good episode to listen to with your partner or friends! Lots of issues to discuss and process.
Published 04/16/24
Todd and Cathy discuss two factors that make parenting feel more self-directed and understandable. While it will still be messy, unpredictable, and tiring, at least you will feel more in your integrity while doing it! They also talk about listening skills, anxiety, NCAA basketball, and Beyoncé's new album.
Published 04/09/24
Todd and Cathy discuss about how genuine curiosity helps our kids really hear us and value what we're saying. The same goes for understanding each other in a partnership or empathizing with someone from a different gender perspective. When we're open about not having all the answers, it paves the way for learning and staying connected.
Published 04/02/24
Cathy and Todd discuss the importance of emotional conversations with our kids and why we need to pay attention to how we experience and perceive what our children are telling us. They discuss what kids really need from us when they are emotional and how we can support them without absolving or absorbing their pain. They also discuss Friday Night Videos and commercials from the 80’s.
Published 03/26/24
Todd & Cathy discuss why it’s the ordinary moments that make us feel connected and content, and why what we end up missing are the simple things, not the big things. They also discuss the five things that make someone a Gen Xer, have a follow-up discussion about astrology and its usefulness, and Cathy talks about her new book RESTORING OUR GIRLS, coming in early 2025.
Published 03/19/24
Todd and Cathy discuss the stories we create about our lives and process whether or not we can reconsider our stories – not to deny reality, but to focus on what’s working rather than what’s lost. They also talk about role models for men, why it’s important to acknowledge every aspect of ourselves, what’s going on with Hall&Oates, and whether or not astrology is a science-based tool.
Published 03/12/24
Cathy and Todd discuss why we struggle to show up as fully ourselves in groups, and how we can get better at noticing this behavior. Then Todd says, “I’m just not feeling it” so they move into a pop culture conversation that seems to be about nothing, or maybe it was about a lot of little somethings including Bon Jovi, the members of New Edition, why stuffed animals are important, how Cathy got their daughter to stop stealing her brush, why Cathy’s college friends are so funny, and the...
Published 03/05/24
Cathy and Todd discuss how our upbringing shapes our current approach to parenting, share why some traditional parenting tricks fall short, and attempt to redefine romance—it's not just about grand gestures, but the heartfelt intentions behind them.
Published 02/27/24
Cathy and Todd discuss an article from The New York Times titled, 'Parents Are Highly Involved in Their Adult Children’s Lives, and Fine With It,' explaining that staying intimately connected to our older children has benefits, not just risks, and most young adults agree. They discuss the perspectives of previous generations and why things have changed, as well as why it’s easy to stay connected due to devices and the research around effective parenting. They also discuss the fascination with...
Published 02/20/24
Todd and Cathy talk with Author Nate Klemp about his new book, Open: Living with an Expansive Mind in a Distracted World. They discuss why technology is addictive and so appealing, and how it’s not our fault that we are attracted to screens and scrolling. They also discuss how being closed leads to polarization and conspiracy theories, while staying open reconnects us and helps us see the world in a new and more optimistic way. Nate shares his experiences with screen bingeing,...
Published 02/13/24
Todd and Cathy discuss the explosion of online sports betting and why kids and teens are more likely to develop a gambling disorder than adults. They discuss the reasons why teens use it, how AI is being used to market at them, and how, just like weed, alcohol, and porn, it necessitates an ongoing conversation to make sure our kids understand how it works (not in their favor) and the possible consequences. They also discuss why setting boundaries is essential to practice true empathy and how...
Published 02/06/24
Todd and Cathy discuss the two types of messy conversations and explain why it's important to know the difference if you want to connect with your kid. They discuss the awesomeness of Zen Parenting, 2024 and share some of the most important lessons learned. They also highlight the significance of knowing less, listening more, and discovering what 'time well spent' means.
Published 01/30/24
In Part Two of our three-part series with Dr. John Duffy, author of 'Rescuing Our Sons,' John shares why emotional intelligence is crucial for boys. He tells a story about one of his clients who took a gender studies class and explores the 'Taylor Swift effect,' emphasizing why boys need more of this kind of joy. Find Part One in the show notes and tune in tomorrow for Part Three.
Published 01/25/24
In Part Two of our three-part series with Dr. John Duffy, author of 'Rescuing Our Sons,' John shares why emotional intelligence is crucial for boys. He tells a story about one of his clients who took a gender studies class and explores the 'Taylor Swift effect,' emphasizing why boys need more of this kind of joy. Find Part One in the show notes and tune in tomorrow for Part Three.
Published 01/24/24
Cathy and Todd interview Dr. John Duffy, author of 'Rescuing Our Sons,' discussing his book and the state of boys in America. In the first part of a three-part series, they explore John's experiences while talking with boys during therapy, the reasons boys feel like they don’t belong, and the lack of male role models for boys today. Listen tomorrow for Part Two.
Published 01/23/24
Cathy and Todd discuss the power of words and how their significance is subjective to the person using them. They focus on the necessity of being seen, emphasizing how the quality of our partnerships and parenting is influenced by our ability to truly see others. The discuss what it means to have a healthy relationship and share why anecdotal evidence may not always be conclusive.
Published 01/16/24
Cathy and Todd share the best clips from interviews with their friends Michelle Icard, Dr. Devorah Heitner, Dr. John Duffy, and Dr. Alexandra Solomon (they are all keynote speakers at Zen Parenting, 2024, Jan 26&27)! They also discuss the heightened skincare of teens, why we need so many sweatshirts, and why conflict is so common in our most important relationships.
Published 01/09/24
Todd and Cathy discuss why it’s important to process how the holidays went before moving forward—what worked, what didn’t, and what can be repaired or celebrated. They also focus on school refusal after the holidays, emotional labor during the holidays, and answer a question about what’s most important when raising boys.
Published 01/02/24
Dr. Shefali returns to ZPR to discuss her new book The Parenting Map: Step-by-Step Solutions to Consciously Create the Ultimate Parent-Child Relationship. They discuss how to check our own egos, recognize our children’s psyches, and make connection the cornerstone of our parenting experience.
Published 12/26/23
Cathy and Todd discuss their favorite holiday movies, what makes them great, and whether or not they are truly holiday movies. They share clips from the best movies and finish with the top 20 best holiday movies of all time.
Published 12/19/23
Todd and Cathy talk with Michelle Icard, the author of '14 Talks by Age 14' and her new book, '8 Setbacks that Can Make a Child a Success.' They discuss why we try to manage everyone's emotions, the challenges of letting our kids experience failure, and how embracing these challenges can contribute to building their character and enabling them to navigate their own lives.
Published 12/12/23
Todd and Cathy discuss gender norms and explore ways to validate, acknowledge, and challenge them. They also dive into the comedy of Nate Bargatze, highlighting its observational nature that prompts thought and reflection.
Published 12/05/23
Cathy and Todd discuss how to create strong support systems for our kids, allowing them to have new and unique experiences and build relationships that contribute to their self-understanding. Teaching them about boundaries, encouraging them to ask for help, and making sure they know it's totally okay to speak up if something feels off give them the confidence to trust themselves, even when you're not right there with them.
Published 11/28/23
Todd and Cathy dive deep into some quotes about gratitude and explore how to incorporate gratitude into our everyday and ordinary lives. They also answer some listener’s questions and play clips from Planes, Trains, and Automobiles (the best Thanksgiving movie!) and Nate Bargatze’s stand-up.
Published 11/21/23