STARCRASH is everything you want it to be. It is space cavemen. It is space amazons. It is space bikinis. It is space battles with space guns. It is space robots. It is space swords. It is NOT Star Wars, for legal purposes. Caroline Munro is STELLA STAR. Christopher Plummer is THE EMPEROR OF THE GALAXY. David Hasselhoff is A GUY WHAT SHOOTS LASERS OUT OF A MASK. Marjoe Gortner is TOUGH ACTIN' TIN-AKTON. Judd Hamilton is ROBIT WITH A COWBOY VOICE (note the actor's name is corrected here... Jason got it wrong in the show). Robert Tessier is THOR BUT NOT WITH MJOLNIR AND HE'S BLUISH.