Ever looked at your desk calendar and felt inspired to do supercrime? Yeah, me neither. But Julian Gregory Day, the man named after not one, but two calendars has! Calendar Man living his best life (I made a mistake in the post and said he was robbing Santa. Really he was trying to steal a giant paper mache diamond because yes that makes more sense: https://myths.link/calendarman -- Cursed swords! Get your cursed sword today...if you can handle it (you can! Don't think about it just do...

The Condiment King proves that you can hold up a bank with dijon mustard. You can't do it well, and you'll get taken down almost immediately, but you can do it. The Condiment King actually first appeared in Batman: The Animated Series, but his first comic appearance was in Batgirl: Year One. -- The Jedi Recruitment Drive is on now! Have a child who can move things with their minds? They'll find you!

Somehow, the Balloon Maker, a villain who makes balloons from a comic clearly meant for children, is the most disturbing villain we've talked about so far. The Balloon Maker made his first (and thankfully last) appearance in Frankenstein #14. -- Check out Zombox! The world's first zombie survival subscription box service at https://zom.box/botw

A violent monster angry that no one will date him. Long-discredited crackpot theories. Is this the internet in 2022? Nope, it's the making of the supervillain Mole Man. Mole Man first appeared in "The Fantastic Four" #1 -- Start building your legacy today with https://topofthemourningto.ya/best  

The Dark Archer is a great name for an objectively terrible villain. Lucky for him, everyone else was equally incompetent. The Dark Archer first appeared in Thrilling Comics #26. -- Get hot fresh buns on the go with the Carbunator! https://carbunator.car/best   The word in the disclaimer is "boner." Apparently in the 1940s people used it in children's comics to mean a clumsy mistake. We mention it between 2:20-2:40 initially, and then again at the end of Dark Archer's section at 6:25.

We'll see how you can find inspiration to improve from the unlikeliest of places...even from a guy named The Melter. He melts stuff, if you couldn't tell from his super creative and terrifying name. The Melter first appeared in Tales of Suspense #47 and Mr. Doll first appeared in Tales of Suspense #48. -- Get an Igor at https://getanigor.com. Don't forget to use our code SLAPPYDOODAH for 15% off!

The Calculator is a guy with a giant pocket calculator on his chest. Probably the worst way to wear a pocket calculator. Also, why would anyone wear a calculator? The Calculator first appeared in Detective Comics #463 -- Special thanks to Dinner for Two® go to https://dinnerfor.two/BEST to get your free pack of quip chips.

Turtle Man is a lesson is never compromising on living the life of your dreams. Unfortunately, for Turtle Man, the life of his dreams was committing robberies dressed like a turtle (tortoise, actually). Turtle Man first appeared in Showcase #4. -- Get your Chairy the Living Chair® today, and always have a seat ready for you. https://chairy.chair code BEST

Zoltan Drago had a dream. A dream of bringing his wax sculptures to life. And a chemistry lab. And no training whatsoever. What could possibly go wrong? Mister Fear first appeared in Daredevil #6 -- Playtime's Over with Toy Stay™ https://toy.spray/stay code BEST

If a "Who's on First" bit was extended into a entire criminal career, Mr. Who is a scientist who discovered a life-changing serum that helped him to change into any form needed, create giant spiders, and have super-strength...and instead of selling it used it to rob art galleries. Mr. Who first appeared More Fun Comics #73 -- Bring your toys to life with Toy Spray! Now with 40% fewer existential crises! Check it out at https://toy.spray/best    

The Asthma Monster is exactly what he sounds like. A guy who gives people asthma. His weakness is inhalers and concussions. The Asthma Monster first appeared in Captain America Meets the Asthma Monster.

What happens when you jump into the East River with radioactive isotopes? You get fish powers, of course. No one laughs at Mr. Fish. And by "no one" we mean "everyone." Mr. Fish first appeared in Luke Cage, Power Man #29. -- Finish off your lair in style with Big Mike's Supercomputers.

Tomorrow Man is proof both that we can have hope in the future (it's a utopia where people forgot how to even make weapons), but also be misanthropic because there's always one disgruntled jerk out to ruin everything. Tomorrow Man first appeared in Journey into Mystery #86 -- Check out your future with FutureTubes® by going to https://future.tubes/bestoftheworst  

I mean, no one condones gladiator fights, but who among us would turn down a chance to watch Superman slug it out with a giant, superpowered gorilla? King Krypton the Super Gorilla first appeared in Action Comics #238 -- Sign up the New Horizons Bakery* mailing list for a free cookie** at https://newhorizons.bakery   *and extra-governmental agency **and help them to claim new worlds with blood and conquest

Robbing Hood is a villain who "robs from the decadent poor and gives to the righteous rich." He is, sadly, in good company. Robbing Hood first appeared in Prize Comics #39. -- Check out Nano Brand Clothes and be ready for whatever life throws at you if you accept their extensive and invasive privacy policy! https://nanobrand.clothes/BEST

Tino the Terrible Teen is the richest teenage in the world, a thing that was probably more noteworthy before TikTok and influencers and stuff. Tino the Terrible Teen first appeared in Challengers of the Unknown #57. -- Also, hi! We're back! It was challenging this summer to find enough time for work, so some things had to be put on hold. I'm going to work to keep this show consistent throughout the fall. It's a lot of fun. -J

You know what you get from eating too many roaches? Superpowers, that's what. But only if they offer you their fancy roach amulet. -- Spots are still available for the BBEGBC August session! Go to https://BBEGBC.evil/best to learn more!

Hunter Mann turned green and made a world-altering discovery. Did he make a billion dollars and pick up his Nobel Prize? Nope. He decided to dress up as a praying mantis and take over Baja California. Praying Mantis Man first appeared in Blue Beetle #4. -- Check Out OnTime and their entire suite of helpful, definitely not soul-crushing time travel products at https://on.time/botw

The Jingler would kill to get his poems published. And he did. And they were still terrible. -- Check out https://RedSkullRedShield.insurance/botw for all RSRS's exciting super villain insurance options!

King Cobra is a research assistant living the life of his dreams: slithering along walls in a skintight bodysuit with "cobra strength" ...whatever that is. NOTE: This is the last episode before we take two weeks off. We'll be back on June 21, 2022!

When your threats start as "first the public library, then the world!" and your grand plans involve provoking children into fistfights, the name "the Clown" might be too serious for you. -- The Clown first appeared in Super-Mystery comics #5

The Top is a surprisingly competent villain for someone directly themed after a children's toy. The Top first appeared in The Flash #122

An icicle is an extremely fragile thing that falls...so of course it's something to model your whole career in super-villainy after. Icicle first appeared in All-American Comics Issue #90 -- Cross over into a better future with Event Horizons.

What happens when Dracula needs a snack but can't bring himself to bite any humans? Hellcow happens. Hellcow first appeared in Giant-Size Man-Thing #5  -- Get your CPC earbuds now and be able to spout off interesting facts with no notice or context whatsoever!

Meet the enemy of Marvel's Daredevil that could be lurking in your home right now...if you use gasoline to clean the carpets. -- Get your very own Sentinel and get a free refill on exploding rocket fists by going to https://sentinel.home.security/rockets