Full transcript: The reason Her and I can't connect to each other in a very deep way is because both of us have made a survival technique out of not caring for people. The only way to connect to a person deeply is to accept and allow the inevitable pain of losing them. Her and I can't stand the idea of taking that much emotional pain. So we develop a distant enough relationship so that we have support and help, but we're still avoiding the  crosshair of losing someone who we love so much that we seriously can't live without them. When She was a kid and realized that she couldn't depend on people to be there for her she was alarmed, scared, became insecure, and undoubtedly felt like the feeling of rejection, insecurity and loneliness could get worse. And to defend herself from this pain (which her particularly sensitive nature couldn't endure) she adopted a method of not caring about people and being cold so that she be sure she wouldn't have to suffer the pain of losing (or especially being left by) someone who was very significant to her. I as well developed a technique of defending myself from losing loved ones by practically not caring about them because I had to emotionally prepare myself to lose my sister when I was 16-17. That pain and method was further reinforced when Jessie treated me so painfully. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/black-screen-white-sound/message