Chapter 1 Introduction and Background of The State of Affairs "The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity" is a book written by Esther Perel, an acclaimed Belgian-born psychotherapist, speaker, and author, primarily known for her work on human relationships. Having been published in 2017, this book delves into the complex subject of infidelity, offering insights into why people cheat, and how marriages can potentially heal from such breaches of trust. Esther Perel's background significantly influences her perspective and methodology presented in the book. Born in 1958 to Polish Holocaust survivors in Antwerp, Belgium, Perel grew up in a multicultural environment where she was exposed to a myriad of languages and cultural perspectives. She later attended the Hebrew University of Jerusalem, where she began her academic journey in educational psychology with further training in psychotherapy. After moving to the United States, she continued her education and started her practice in New York City. Perel's multicultural upbringing and her professional experience in different parts of the world enrich her approach towards understanding human relationships. Her work is marked by a deep compassion for the complexities of human desires and the myriad ways in which they manifest in personal relationships. She is fluent in multiple languages, which not only allows her to reach a global audience but also deepens her understanding of cultural contexts in emotional and psychological negotiations within relationships. In "The State of Affairs," Perel explores the themes of modern marriage, monogamy, and infidelity. The book challenges conventional perceptions of these topics. She argues that infidelity can be a symptom of broader relational issues or dissatisfaction, as well as a result of personal turmoil or crisis. The book does not condone infidelity but seeks to understand it from a psychological standpoint. Perel uses a range of real-life cases from her clinical practice to illustrate her points, making the theoretical discussions more relatable and grounded in real-world scenarios. The context of the book extends further into the broader societal and cultural frameworks of marriage and monogamy. Perel discusses how the changing views on marriage—as partners expect their spouses to be everything to them (best friend, passionate lover, intellectual stimulant)—have also affected how infidelity is perceived and dealt with in societies. She examines how different cultures view infidelity and the peculiar pressures that modern marriages face. Overall, "The State of Affairs" provides a nuanced, compassionate, and thought-provoking look at why infidelity happens, how it affects relationships, and what can be drawn from the aftermath to rebuild or end relationships. It’s a reflection of Perel's broader work where she continually encourages challenging traditional belief systems about relationships to embrace a more empathetic, understanding approach towards human imperfections and emotional complexities. Chapter 2 Analysis of Main Content In "The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity" by Esther Perel, a variety of discursive techniques, analytical skills, and theories are utilized to provide a deep understanding of the complexities of infidelity in relationships. Here are three key approaches used in the book: Multicultural Perspective: Esther Perel employs a multicultural lens in her analysis of infidelity, drawing upon her background and experience from working in different cultural contexts. This approach helps in contrasting how relationships and infidelity are viewed in various societies, and how these cultural nuances influence personal and communal perceptions of infidelity. This technique allows readers to recognize that notions of love, betrayal, and loyalty are not universal but are shaped by cultural expectations and norms. Psychological and Relational Theories: Perel integrates various psychological theories including