Are you doing what is expected of you? Viv Groskop talks to writer Delia Ephron about following other people's rules. She explains how to blow it and still have a life. She talks about grief, about storytelling, about not having a strong sense of yourself - and about working out how to be true to yourself. It's not important to own the room, she says. It's important to own your own vision.   You can find out more about Delia on her website, and buy her book Left on Tenth: A Second Chance at Life A new updated edition of Viv's book, How to Own the Room is out now. @vivgroskop