On a regular basis (meaning, several times each week), I have a discussion with a client that ends in the client saying, "I can't...."  Yes, they finish the sentence in many ways.  But the start of the sentence is my focus:  "I can't." I have a colleague that responds to clients who say, "I can't," with "You can."  That doesn't quite get there, though.  At least for me, I don't think that is the whole answer. Over the years, I noticed that "can't" is far more complex than we notice. You may have heard that in other languages, there are multiple words to describe what another language would only have as a single word.  For instance, the Greek language has multiple words to say, "love."  And at least in lore, there are many words in Inuit to say, "snow." There should be, in my opinion, multiple words for "can't."  But here we are, often with conversations ending with "I can't." So, I will take it further.  In this episode of the Save The Marriage Podcast, I note four different "can'ts."  One really, truly, is. One is really, truly, NOT. And the other two, you have to work through. If you find yourself saying, "I can't save my marriage," or "I can't change," or "I can't see a way," you may want to take a listen.  You may be stuck in a "can't" that isn't. Listen below!   RELATED RESOURCES: The Certainty Trap Episode Stuck In Negativity Episode The Connection Compass Articles The Save The Marriage System