What if the true opposition to the gospel is hidden inside our own implicit assumptions about reality? Identifying and confronting our emotional distress is essential for identifying our lack of alignment with the Father’s will. For you, I believe that taking up *your* cross would require you to actively pursue becoming aware of and confronting the roots of your emotional distress, because you have become addicted to a superficial yielding that does not result in emotional catharsis or true intimacy. I need to go now and do the exact same thing with MY wife (confront the roots of MY emotional distress). Four Stages of Engagement. Try to fix your problem  Step back and let you fix it yourself Incarnate into the tension beneath the problem Demonstrate Christ's new victory