“It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.” - Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy It should come as no surprise that we don't subscribe to the belief that time heals all wounds. But what DOES heal wounds, and are all wounds healable? ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - Detritus - Still Breathing, an interview with Katie Joy Duke - All About...

In this episode, we talk about how we tell the story of our loss(es). It depends a LOT on the audience, our energy level, and so many other factors. We can't wait to chat about this with you all on Instagram, so head over and follow us so you can join the conversation! We also take a TOTAL tangent about naked photos so please enjoy our chaos :) ::: Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at...

The title says it all. In this episode, we talk about what it's like for Alina to be NOT pregnant -- again -- while Judith is pregnant -- again. It's harder than the last time, but probably not as hard as you'd expect? Note: this was recorded back in January, but it's May, and Alina is STILL not pregnant as of the release of this episode. Send wine. ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - ALAIL | Loose Threads, a Conversation About Unrealized Dreams ::: Follow As Long As I'm...

"I think about them all the time" -- this is a thing that loss parents SAY a lot about their baby, but what do we actually mean? We try to explain. ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - Beyonce ⁠Heartbeat⁠ - ALAIL | ⁠A Picture Is Not the Same As Being Together⁠ ::: Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love...

We're returning from our accidentally really kinda long podcast break, and we are so happy to be back! Catch up with what has been up with us since January, while we catch up with what's been going on with all of YOU while we were out (via Instagram question box). ::: Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear...

We're back from our break to say... we're not coming back (yet). Alina is not doing well, and because she mainly edits the podcast, that means that we can't keep releasing new episodes right now. That's okay! We'll be back when we're ready. Content note: Judith is pregnant, and (barely) announces in this episode. ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - What a Shame She's F****d in the Head sweatshirt (Etsy) - ALAIL | Happy For You, Sad For Me (On Pregnancy...

We're taking a podcast break, but while we're out, we're sharing some tips/tricks/recommendations from the bottoms of our very random hearts. This week: how to take a really good bath, from Judith, and some other cheap or free hobbies. XOXO ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - Baked by Melissa - Trader Joe's Green Goddess dressing - Reddit 30+ Skincare - Lush Melts bath bars ::: Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email...

We're taking a podcast break, but while we're out, we're sharing some tips/tricks/recommendations from the bottoms of our very random hearts. This week: If you have regained the ability to read after your baby died, we have some recs for you! Judith's are sweet and fluffy. Alina's are about severe mental illness. XOXO ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - Lessons in Chemistry - Icebreaker, Hannah Grace - A Heart that Works, Rob Delaney - Everything is Fine - Juliet the...

We're taking a podcast break, but while we're out, we're sharing some tips/tricks/recommendations from the bottoms of our very random hearts. This week: we share a list of reality TV shows that will pass the time, and Alina talks around WTF happened in Saltburn. Watch that one at your own risk! XOXO ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - Love is Blind Sweden - Bad Vegan - Six Feet Under - Millionaire Matchmaker - Indian Matchmaker - Jewish Matchmaker - Saltburn ::: Follow As...

We're taking a podcast break, but while we're out, we're sharing some tips/tricks/recommendations from the bottoms of our very random hearts. This week: Judith wanders down a TikTok rabbit hole and shares her favorite follows. XOXO ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - Therapy Jeff - Mrs. Melody Jenkins - Cost n' Mayor - Carla & Clio ::: Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at...

We're taking a podcast break, but while we're out, we're sharing some tips/tricks/recommendations from the bottoms of our very random hearts. This week: Alina talks about WTF is going on with generational-wealth-holder, beauty-pageant-contestant, homemade-butter-churner, and mother-of-8 Ballerina Farm. XOXO ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - Ballerina Farm at Mrs. World - Kyte Baby controversy ::: Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠,...

We're taking a podcast break, but while we're out, we're sharing some tips/tricks/recommendations from the bottoms of our very random hearts. This week: Judith talks about her polygamist podcast obsession and shares a few ways to travel the world via Youtube. XOXO ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - Growing Up In Polygamy - Simon Wilson - Harald Baldr ::: Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at...

Listen y'all... we're tired, and we need a break! We'll be back with real episodes in a few weeks. While we're on our podcast break, we're going to share some tips/tricks/recommendations from the bottoms of our very random hearts. This week: what on earth to write in someone else's baby shower card. XOXO ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - ALAIL| Happy for You, Sad for Me (On Pregnancy Announcements) - Five Dot Post greeting cards - Em and Friends greeting cards - Noble...

Back in our first month of the podcast, we talked about how the "old" Judith and Alina might never be back ever again, but who cares, because we're Wonder Women just the way we are. That said, we hated when people would tell us how brave and strong we were in our first year of the loss. Now... 3 years out... we feel differently! (And also kind of the same.) Listen to hear how our thoughts have evolved on this topic over the past 2 years. Sending love to all of the Wonder Women, Men, Theys,...

Today on the podcast, we're joined by Judith's friend Mel! Judith met Mel in the neighborhood about a year after Aiden died, and somehow managed to befriend her even though Mel is not a bereaved parent. In this episode, we talk all about making new friendships after loss. We'll talk more about this on Instagram this week, so check in to see! ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - There Are No Words, an interview with widow and greeting card maker Jess Walker of Five Dot Post -...

2024, watch out! Don't even bother trying to be bad, because we are going to FORCE YOU TO BE GOOD. We are ready for a good year; we've earned it. ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - ⁠Happier New Year⁠: 2022's new year episode, where we talk 2021 and 2022 horoscopes - We Reject Our 2023 Horoscopes: 2023's new year episode, where we talk about our 2022 and 2023 horoscopes - Judith's ⁠2023⁠ and 2024 yearly horoscopes! (Sagittarius) - Alina's ⁠2023⁠ and 2024 yearly horoscopes!...

Hi there! Alina live podcasted her Christmas Day. A lucky few of you listened live (hello!), but she's since edited this down to something a little more coherent. Sending holiday season love to anyone celebrating or avoiding celebrating. ::: Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at @aslongasimlivingpodcast, send us an email at [email protected], or visit us at anchor.fm/aslongasimliving! We would love to hear from you! ::: As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about...

Today on the podcast, we're honoring Judith's birthday (today!) by talking about how hard it is to celebrate another year without your baby. Getting another year older when your baby never will is a tough pill to swallow. Listen to hear our thoughts on our birthdays and others after our babies died. ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - Bustle's article: "The Birthday Blues are a Real Thing" - ALAIL | An Incomparable Loss, an interview with Miranda's Mom Christine ::: Follow As...

We're joined on the podcast again today by Rabbi Nissan Antine. In this episode, we talk about what a clergyperson or rabbi does when they arrive at the scene of a death. We also talk about the difference between grief and mourning. Do you know a clergyperson of a different faith that you'd like to see us interview for the podcast? Please let us know ⁠here⁠! ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - Trauma, Blah Blah Blah ::: Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at...

Today on the podcast, we're welcoming our first clergyperson, Rabbi Nissan Antine. In this episode, we talk about Rabbi Antine's role when a loved one dies and discuss the laws and structures that Judaism puts in place to support those who are mourning. Do you know a clergyperson of a different faith that you'd like to see us interview for the podcast? Please let us know here! ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - Tefillin - Hester Panim - Crisis of Faith - Jewish mourning...

(i carry it in my heart) In this episode, we talk about how we keep Quinn and Aiden alive in our hearts and homes. This is one of the ways that we continue to parent our boys, and it feels like an important part of our life's work to make sure their memory doesn't die with them. Do you have a special way or ways you include your baby in your life? We'd love to hear about it! ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - Aiden's grave suncatchers ::: Follow As Long As I'm Living on...

We'd like to be a little less strong, but unfortunately we are still flexing our resilience muscles every single day. We're heading into whatever fresh hell this new week has in store for us, armed with antidepressants, candles, and the new perspective granted to us by the loss. Join us! P.S. The internet was not our friend during this recording. Apologies for the pure chaos that unfolds as we tried to record a simple life update! ::: Things we talk about in this episode: - Judith's...

"Mortui Vivos Docent" is Latin for the Dead Teach the Living, and it's also the TikTok handle of autopsy tech (and first responder) Ephina Disinger. We are joined again today by Ephina and her coworker and friend chief deputy coroner Caroline Hanau. If you missed our first interview with Ephina and Caroline, you can find it here. We have included an explicit content warning at the beginning of this episode, which we never do, because not everyone wants to hear about the ins and outs of...

How many guests have we hosted on As Long As I'm Living podcast? What is the only US state that we've never had a listener from? What is the name of the episodes where we talk about body image, grief in the media, or traveling while bereaved? We quiz each other on these questions, and many more, in this special anniversary episode of As Long As I'm Living podcast! We're so glad you're here. ::: You can find all of the old episodes we talk about HERE! ::: Follow As Long As I'm Living on...

We are joined today by paramedic and autopsy technician Ephina Disinger and her coworker and friend chief deputy coroner Caroline Hanau. If you had told us 3 years ago that we'd be interviewing experts in infant autopsy after our sons' sudden deaths... well, we wouldn't believe you. But we can't tell you just how HEALING this conversation was, not to mention fascinating. Infants are not supposed to die. In this episode, we talk to Ephina and Caroline about the process of investigating why...