Episodes
Brother is back! In today's episode, we talk about Caroline's new luxurious LA lifestyle. We also talk about past memories like how our childhood home got broken into but we didn't notice for 3 days (I thought my brother borrowed all my money).
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Published 07/27/20
TikTok superstar Dawn Morante joins Caroline on this weeks podcast episode. Caroline forces Dawn to take an ugly test before she can give beauty advice to our listeners. Dawn and Caroline also talk about being roomies and members the TikTok Mansion, The House Nobody Asked For, located in the heart of Los Angeles.
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Published 07/20/20
In this week's episode, we talk about our confusion surrounding Shane Dawson's influence on the YouTube beauty community. Like who let a 31 year old that looks like he doesn't shower sell a million average looking eyeshadow palettes?? We also give advice to an up and coming makeup artist with overbearing parents. Just run away, duh!
Published 06/30/20
In this week's episode, we discuss Jeffree Star's newest scandal (c'mon Jeffree, you're 34, get your life together!) and how Caroline was on his payroll. We also give the presidential candidates beauty advice that could get them elected. This all comes from the Student Body President of the United States so listen up!
Published 06/22/20
In this week's episode, Caroline bribes her mom into being a special guest by telling her that they would go on a shopping spree (she lied). Reluctantly, Caroline's mom gets candid about Caroline's lavish upbringing as well as the time she was approached by a random woman offering her a modeling career in Milan. Unfortunately, she turned down the offer so she could be a stay-at-home mom in Ohio. Exciting!
Published 06/15/20
In this week's episode, we roast influencers who use the BLM protests as backgrounds for their Instagram photos. We also help a struggling orphan to reconnect with his long lost mother.
Published 06/08/20
In this week's episode, we talk about how plastic surgery is the answer to climate change because surgeons are reusing plastic water bottles and injecting them into the face. We also give a listener advice on how to become rich by virtually doing nothing AKA Caroline's entire career.
Published 06/01/20
In this week's episode, we talk about Jeffree Starr's controversial eyeshadow palette that is made of human cremations. We also discuss Caroline's celebrity connections and give advice to a listener that wants to get into Caroline's A list circle of friends.
Published 05/25/20
In this week's episode, we talk about mean girl Ellen DeGenerous and cancel culture. We also talk about Caroline's inability to handle college and come to the realization that she will not be able to graduate.
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Published 05/18/20
In this week's episode, we about the reality of college and why influencers should stay in school.
Published 05/11/20
In this week's episode, we give an ex-convict beauty advice that will change her life and land her a job.
Published 05/04/20
In this week's episode we discuss how most of your favorite influencers are poor. No, we're not talking about us.
FunctionofBeauty.com/dontbeugly to take your four part hair profile quiz and save 20% on your first order.
For 50% off your first Care/of order, go to TakeCareOf.com and enter code ugly50.
Published 04/27/20
Every Monday, Me and my co-host Philip are going to teach you how to Not Be Ugly from the back of our dads minivan. Some of us have beauty, others have brains. I have both. This is why I am offering advice free of charge.
Published 04/21/20