"We must be careful neither to criticize nor condemn the person with whom we wish to restore a relationship." Sometimes saying, "I forgive you," is misheard and perceived as "I blame you." "A better approach would be, "I want you to know how much our relationship means to me. Our estrangement hurts me deeply. I wonder how we might work together to make things right. I'm here because I care." "We must let go of our pain and hatred." "The 'As If" principle states that we must act "as if" the desired reconciliation has already happened."  "We may not be able to will forgiveness, but we certainly can will steps that lead to forgiveness." "Warm actions melt hearts." The General Irene, "It's hard to hate someone you're praying for."