Conditioned anxiety and the absent parent Absence of a parent leads to conditioned anxiety and inability to self-regulate. Even for a child who is resilient, the initial loss is debilitating. Child feels let down when parents are absent, even when they pass away. Kids can not understand or process the reasons for their parent leaving or passing on. Children are naturally entitled, because their brains have not developed to process such data. And naturally, they need nurturing from their caregivers. They developed separation anxiety, and might become insecure attached Some children become overly independent and grow up quickly These children suppress their needs and wants for fear nobody cares. They fear attaching to another person due to fear of being abandoned again. Others become overly clingy on existing or replacement caregivers to avoid rejection. They might hold on despite abuse or poor treatment. Some children have a mix of these characteristics due to how they were looked after by their caregivers, or how they might be looked after by replacement or existing caregivers. Without support or healing, these children may exhibit these qualities in adult relationships. Consequently relationships will be dysfunctional and unhealthy. Heal the inner child to connect with yourself and for healthy relationships. Heal abandonment wounds Be the parent you needed when you were a child Invest in a support group Create boundaries and say no to wean yourself off unhealthy relationships