In this episode, Amanda speaks with Dr. Megan Anna Neff, psychologist and co-host of the Neurodivergent Conversations podcast, to discuss how understanding the nervous system changes everything about parenting. They explore how stress responses affect both parents and children, the power of co-regulation, and why meltdowns are more than just big emotions. Dr. Neff shares insights on the autonomic nervous system, practical strategies for supporting neurodivergent kids, and the science of repair after ruptures. Tune in for a conversation on finding compassion and resilience, even in the most challenging parenting moments.   12 Days of Low Demand Holidays:  I'll say it: Holidays can be the absolute worst. This transformative course is tailored for families navigating the unique challenges of the holiday season. Discover impactful video lessons, a comprehensive workbook, and recording of an interactive Q&A to empower you through the festivities. See all the details here!   Links: Meet Dr. Megan Anna Neff Explore Neurodivergent Insights page Check out Megan Anna's wonderful book "Self-Care for Autistic People" Listen to Divergent Conversations podcast with Dr. Neff and Patrick Casale   Time Stamps: 00:34 Meet Megan Anna Neff 02:18 Understanding the Nervous System 04:29 Sympathetic and Parasympathetic Systems 06:50 Nervous System Responses to Stress 09:17 Interacting Nervous Systems in Parenting 10:31 The Science of Interpersonal Neurobiology 11:19 Understanding Mirror Neurons 12:42 The Pressure of Staying Regulated 14:58 The Importance of Repair in Parenting 15:43 Modeling Self-Regulation for Children 17:49 Honesty and Trust in Parenting     Additional Resources: As we move into the end of 2024, you're going to LOVE the Low Demand Holidays course -- your step-by-step holiday survival guide. With your high-needs kids, with burnout hovering, and too much on your plate -- Is celebration and joy even possible? It absolutely can be when you drop demands and focus on what truly matters. Low Demand Parenting book: a love letter to exhausted, overwhelmed parents everywhere. Get the first chapter free!  Why is everything with my kid so hard?: Take the quiz to find your first step forward! Low Demand Parenting Blog: a treasure trove of low demand wisdom   Follow us on social for updates on the podcast, blog, and more!  Instagram Facebook Pinterest   Transcript: Welcome to the Low Demand Parenting Podcast, where we drop the pressure, find the joy, and thrive, even when it feels like life is stuck on level 12 hard. I'm Amanda Diekmann, author, autistic adult, and mom of three. I'm not here as an expert, but a fellow traveler. Together, we're learning how to live more gently, authentically, and vibrantly in this wild parenting life. In our episode today, I am talking with my friend Megan Anna Neff. Megan Anna is a psychologist, an autistic and ADHD adult, co host of the Neurodivergent Conversations podcast and author of Self Care for Autistic People. This conversation about the nervous system is so important to me as a parent and a parenting coach because I think it's essential information. People come to me all the time asking, are we doing this right? Is my kid doing okay? Here's what's going on in our lives. Are they developmentally on track? We have so many questions and we're always looking around and comparing our kids to other kids, our kids to the normal, our kids to what it says in the book, because we want to answer one fundamental question, which is, are they okay? And the complicated answer is, yes. The only measurement we've been given is in our own bodies. We've been given an internal barometer. It's the nervous system. The only way to know really whether or not something is a reasonable expectation or something you need to drop, whether it's aligned and it feels good or whether it's totally not the right approach, is inside of your body and inside of your child. Learni