“Guided and strengthened by God’s grace, husband and wife advance their own perfection… and contribute jointly to the glory of God” ~ Gaudium et Spes   Summary You should never marry someone with the idea that you can change them, but we do need to help our spouses become the best version of themselves.  We all should have a vision, a belief that our spouse can be amazing and then work with them for their good.  In this podcast, we hear the inspiring story of Dan and Brenda - a couple from...

Show me your checkbook and your datebook and I will show you what you value   Summary So much of what we talk about on this podcast really hits home when it comes to how we spend our time.  Family dinner, date nights, prayer time, even mass comes down to making time to do it.  Four things determine how we run our lives and our family - talent, money, energy and time. Every one has different amounts of energy and talent and money, but we all have the same amount of time!  How we use it is...

“Genuine humility never disturbs the soul.  Rather it is accompanied by peace, joy and calm” St. Theresa of Avila   Summary What is the biggest problem in Catholic marriages?  Although we appreciate good communication tools, marriage insights, and mentors - at the end of the day the biggest problem is simply a lack of holiness.  One essential tool in our quest for holiness is learning how to ask for forgiveness.  When we have conflict in our home, we all need to ask ourselves the question -...

In this special Q&A episode, we dive into some of the most heartfelt questions from our listeners. From the complex question of whether to expand the family to grappling with grief, boundaries in marriage, and integrating elderly parents into a household, these issues strike at the core of family life. We also tackle how to balance the call to evangelize in a world that often conflicts with our values—especially when raising children in today’s cultural climate. Join us as we explore...

“It’s important that we remember to talk ‘to’ our kids, not ‘at’ them” - Mark Hart   Summary Parents are rightly concerned today about the influence of the culture on their teens.  As much as we would like to put our kids in a teflon bubble to shield them from the false fake culture of the world, it is just not possible!  What do our kids need from us to prepare them for life?  Join us in this podcast for a conversation with Mark Hart of Lifeteen - a speaker, author, and parent himself of...

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop than in a mansion with a quarrelsome wife.  Proverbs 25:24 Summary All of us do things that annoy our spouse.  Occasionally, we do things that hurt our spouse and vice versa.  How do we communicate about these situations?  Is it effective to tell them what they have done wrong?  Is that what the scriptures tell us to do?  In this episode, we discuss what it means to take “extreme ownership” of our own actions and emotions before trying...

“You can learn many things from toddlers! For example, how much patience you actually have.”  -Anonymous One blessing of having ten kids is that we have matured and learned enough about kids to appreciate the toddler years of children #9 and 10 much more than those years with children #1 and 2. Our advice to parents of toddlers is to start by enjoying them! It’s hard to do when they are destroying your house and embarrassing you in public, but with a few strategies and consistency on your...

Other Resources Welcome His Heart:  https://welcomehisheart.com/ MFP 165: Forgiveness Brings Freedom and Transformation Videos - Evangelizing Your Kids and Forgiveness in the Family https://messyfamilyproject.org/course/pizza-and-parenting/watch/ Key Takeaways Parents must be very intentional about evangelizing their children and bringing them into a relationship with Christ. Marriage is a sacrament of service to the world.  Our marriages are not just for us, they are an office...

“You and your spouse are a team that GOD wants together!” - Art and LaraineBennett   Summary The first step in creating a dynamic family is to know the people who are in it!  That starts with knowing yourself, then your spouse, and then your children.  One of the tools that we love using for this knowledge is the classic four temperaments - choleric, sanguine, melancholic, and phlegmatic. The leading Catholic authors on the temperaments are Art and Laraine Bennett, authors of the book The...

Your authority in the family does not come from perfection, it comes as a grace from your parenthood.   Summary There are two kinds of families - those that are frantic and those that are fruitful.  As Catholics we have an incredible grace to be fruitful families, but often our families don’t look much different than the secular, frantic families around us!  How can we live family life differently? There are so many different parenting philosophies out there.  Which ones should Catholics...

Summary: In this episode, we explore several listener's questions about how to manage friendships when personal values differ, particularly in situations where children are involved. Mike and Alicia are joined by their daughter, Katie to dive into the challenge of maintaining friendships with those whose lifestyle choices may conflict with Catholic teaching, while still modeling love and compassion for others. The conversation focuses on how to love the person, hold true to your beliefs, and...

Beauty resets our compass.  It reminds us of who we are and what we are made for. ~ Andrew Peterson   Summary Our children will grow no matter what, but how they grow and what they learn is heavily dependent on their environment.  Parents can shape the world of their children to include beauty, freedom of artistic expression, and space to wonder.  In this podcast, we talk to Andrew Peterson, singer, songwriter, author, father and now grandfather.  Over the last 25 years, Andrew has used his...

“21% of teens said their #1 concern was not having enough time with their parents. Only 8% of parents said their #1 concern was not having enough time with their kids.” ― Meg Meeker   Summary After 13 years of marriage we had six children and were pretty confident in our parenting. But when our oldest daughter became a teenager, we felt like we needed to learn how to parent all over again!  This sweet 12 year old seemed to begin changing before our eyes and we had to pivot pretty quickly to...

Happiness is determined by our expectations…. If our expectations are modest… we will be happy; if our expectations are unrealistic, we end up disappointed. ~Bishop Anthony Taylor, Diocese of Little Rock Summary All of us come into our vocations with expectations.  We have dreams and plans, but expectations are more like assumptions.  We have our own experience and we expect that things will go a certain way.  The problem is, we can’t always articulate these expectations or even realize...

The body is not meaningless, but meaningful - Jason Evert Summary Join us for this insightful conversation with Jason Evert, speaker and author.  Jason has spoken all over the world and has created numerous resources for preteens and teens to dive deep into what it means to be free to love.  Often parents feel under-equipped to talk about sex and chastity, but it is within the home that these lessons need to be learned and it is where they are taught most effectively.  The first step is...

"Like a city that is broken into and without walls is a man who has no control over his spirit" Proverbs 25:28   Summary:  Have you ever had a child melt down because they didn’t get what they wanted? How do we respond to emotional outbursts in our children? Self-control is an underappreciated virtue in our modern culture, but ironically, it is the one skill we can teach our children that can help them achieve great success.  Instead of embracing the maxim of today, “Just do it!” we should...

Join us for a special episode of the Messy Family Podcast, recorded live at the 10th National Eucharistic Congress in Indianapolis! In this episode, Mike hosts a lively discussion on the joys and challenges of family life. Mike, who flew in from Ireland, shares his family traditions and reflections on building a lasting legacy. Plus, special guests Ennie and Cana Hickman talk about their journey of raising nine children, balancing ministry and marriage, and the importance of regular date...

Parent’s reaction to their children is more important than any consequence that they may give.  It is our reaction that teaches our children.   Summary One of the trickiest things for a parent is when they catch their child in a lie.  Do you punish them for lying?  Do you punish the offense?  How do you teach the virtue of honesty when lying seems to come so naturally to them?  Join in our conversation with Jordan Langdon of Families of Character, a ministry that coaches parents to be their...

Play is the work of childhood.  Summary It seems like in today’s world, parents are judged by how many activities their kids are in and how committed the whole family is to those activities.  We see this as leading to complete burnout for parents, but more importantly, it robs children of the joy of unsupervised, spontaneous time to just play.  We explain in this podcast what play is and why it is so important for children to engage in. The beautiful thing about play is that parents should...

Growing in holiness doesn’t require extraordinary actions, it requires doing ordinary things with great love.  And there is nothing more “ordinary” in the life of a child than a parent.   Summary Often when people talk about life with children, the focus is on just getting through their childhood with your sanity in one piece!  There is some truth to that because parenting can be the most challenging thing you may ever do, but we would like to offer a different perspective.  What if we did...

The greatest and most important collaboration you will ever have with another person is raising a child with your spouse.   Summary Parents come to us with discipline issues all the time and our first question is usually, “What does your spouse think about this?”  You see, the most important person to learn from is the other parent of this child you are trying to raise!  It is when moms and dads work together that the greatest power is unleashed in parenting and that is when we can do the...

Parenting isn’t about doing everything perfectly.  It's about showing up over and over again no matter what.     Summary Some may question how a celibate man could have wisdom for husbands and wives, let alone parents.  But in this interview with Fr. Mike Schmitz, host of the Bible in a Year podcast, we think everyone will agree that his insights are awesome! Drawing from his own family experience as well as his role as a spiritual father, Fr. Mike shares with us how to love children who...

Our parents made us sisters, but God made us friends.     Summary One of the greatest blessings of Alicia’s life is that God gave her 9 brothers and sisters to laugh, play, fight, create, and pray with most of her life! This conversation is from a girls getaway weekend with the five Doman sisters.  Now, because all the Doman siblings are practicing Catholics  in good relationship with each other and their parents, people may put them in a category of “the perfect Catholic family”.  But that...

Summary In this episode, we explore the essential aspects of training for virtue and the challenging task of granting freedom to our children. We emphasize the importance of always communicating that you are on their side as a mentor, teacher, and guide, expecting mistakes along the way. We discuss the value of risking giving your child freedom, acknowledging it's not an easy journey. Key discussion points include how to provide more freedom for kids to make good choices, understanding if...