Approximately 84 percent of gay men say they feel under intense pressure to have a good body. Only one percent stated they were “very happy” with their appearance, and as they grow older, the body image struggles seem to intensify.  Why are gay men hyper-focused on body image? Objectification, mattering, minority stress and gay ageism are contributors to a gay man’s dissatisfaction with his body, studies have shown. In addition, Apps like Grindr only make it worse. Gay men are shamed,...

Your sex drive has shut down. You’re getting older, you’ve hit menopause, and you don’t feel beautiful anymore. You do not have to be ghosted by your libido, says Sex Therapist Susana Mayer, PhD, during a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast. Sexuality is ageless. Your body may be changing, but that does not mean your sex life is ending. You are in charge of your pleasure. If you feel your partner is not understanding the physical changes you are going through and how they are affecting your...

Can a polyamorous relationship work? Is monogamy the only relationship that can succeed? According to Certified Sex Therapist Martha Kauppi, beautifully functioning open relationships can and do work!  Polyamory involves engaging in multiple romantic or sexual relationships with different people. These relationships will work, but couples must first put the right pieces in place to ensure a secure, successful, workable and healthy polyamorous relationship. Here are a few factors to consider...

In hopes of helping other couples publicly transition easier, Sarah Scales, a licensed master social worker with The Center for Relationship and Sexual Health in Royal Oak, Michigan, shares her story as a pansexual woman married to a trans female. “I came into the relationship knowing my partner was gender fluid,” she begins in this Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast. At first, the relationship was uncomfortable, not because of her partner’s gender fluidity, but because they didn’t know how to...

Everybody is talking about anal sex … but are they really talking about it? During a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Evan Goldstein, DO, a nationally renowned anal surgeon, talks candidly about anal sex, and how to do it successfully and experience a new heightened level of pleasure, while keeping it safe and clean. He started his surgical practice about 10 years ago focusing on everything anal. Dr. Goldstein is considered the preeminent expert and thought leader in this field, bringing the...

Most people don’t know they should bring science into the bedroom before having sex. That’s why nationally renowned Anal Surgeon Evan Goldstein, DO, founded The Future Method, an innovative step-by-step approach to sex care. Backed by extensive scientific research, The Future Method consists of products developed by medical professionals to improve sexual health. During a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Dr. Goldstein talks about why the anus and anal area need to be treated with respect. As an...

Let’s take a moment to relive those days as children on the playground. Were you bullied, teased, or ridiculed? You probably remember some of those experiences like they happened yesterday. Years ago, you built walls of protection and silos of safety to make sure no one could hurt you.  It’s time to tear down those walls and silos and take the risk of going back to the playground again, say John Ball and Lisa Goyette. During a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast. John and Lisa, founders of CH...

Unfortunately, we live in a world of either/or, with us or against us, conservative or liberal, for gay rights or against gay rights. In a Smart Sex Smart Love podcast, Lucie Fielding, sex educator, writer and therapist, challenges binary in every way. Can society and social culture ever break out of the world of binary thinking? This mindset is changing too slowly despite the increasing visibility of trans and non-binary folx. We need to step away from white cis folx and monogamy and step...

There is an epidemic … people leading secret lives. It causes psychological and relationship mayhem. Your innate sexuality is your birth right, however, few claim it. In fact, many struggle most of their life searching for their authentic self instead of freely enjoying their sexuality, and expressing it honestly, consensually and shame-free.   No matter how much you have struggled in the past with secretive, compulsive, unhealthy sexual behaviors, you still can learn to become sexually...

It remains taboo in the black community to seek mental health services. It feels unsafe, it is intimidating, and it is not the place to air your dirty laundry. These beliefs need to change, says Darcia Miller, a licensed master social worker with The Center for Relationship and Sexual Health in Royal Oak, Michigan. She knows they are true … not just by her work as a mental health therapist, but as an African American woman who was raised with these beliefs. And she also knows it is time to...

“For each rejection, I’m a better, stronger person.” Tylia Flores, disability activist and advocate, was born with Cerebral Palsy. Although her condition has affected her mobility, it never has altered her determination to make a difference in the world. Through her many challenges and obstacles, she discovered a passion for writing and chose to share her life experiences with anyone who will listen. In a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Tylia talks about dating and Cerebral Palsy and the...

Why don’t we talk about sexual pleasure?  Why are teenage boys taking Viagra? How can older adults continue to enjoy sex? At the Pornhub Wellness Center, these questions – and dozens more – are discussed honestly and openly and backed by evidence-based facts. During a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Dr. Joe Kort interviewed Laurie Betito, PhD, a clinical psychologist, sex therapist and Director of the Pornhub Wellness Center. The sexual wellness, sexual health and sexual education website was...

It’s not conversation at the dinner table, but millions of people from all over the globe quietly are listening and learning about anal sex. It’s one of most talked about topics on social media, and a pleasure no one should be denied just because people...

How do you master midlife as a gay man? Do you see it as a time of crisis, or a time of new beginnings? Do you feel confused or empowered? Are you disoriented or excited?During a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Buck Dodson, board certified life coach and...

I’ve heard the story so many times through the years …. a husband comes out of the closet, only to send his wife into it. Mixed orientation marriages and relationships are far more common than we realize, but our culture still considers them taboo. One spouse is gay or bisexual, one is heterosexual, and the secret finally is released, only to cause anger, hurt, resentment and a flood of negative emotions. These couples still love each other, which creates even more anxiety and conflict. This...

“Marriage shouldn’t be this hard.” “Now that we are family, we should be getting along but we aren’t.” “We are in this for the long haul, but I don’t know if the long haul is worth the struggles we are encountering.” Approximately 67 percent of what couples argue about never goes away. And the baggage they carry into the marriage never seems to lighten. A happy and healthy marriage can exist … but it takes some effort. Just because you checked the “married” box doesn’t mean the honeymoon...

Conflict is natural in a divorce, but what happens to the kids in the midst of a brutal divorce battle? Parents are so fixated on “winning” the fight while their children stand on the sidelines confused, frightened and worried. Child-centered mediation can be a win for everyone. A child-centered mediator helps couples develop a collaborative mindset that sets the tone for the rest of the divorce process. Parents meet with the mediator to discuss a tangible, written parenting plan, which is an...

Approximately 56 percent of men “admit” they use makeup. “Admit” is the key word. There seems to be a taboo associated with men’s cosmetics. Like sex, it’s something we don’t talk about it. But it IS time to talk. During a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, host Joe Kort, PhD, spoke candidly with Jon Shanahan, co-founder of Stryx, a men’s cosmetics company launched two years ago to provide the products men need, but aren’t comfortable saying so. Jon likes to tell everyone that he is straight,...

Are you afraid to date someone with autism? Do you feel it will be like having sex with a “robot?” Do you think the sex will be bad and passionless, and your needs will not be met? Think again. Neurodiverse relationships can, and do, work. Ashley Grubbs, a licensed professional counselor who practices in Colorado, Texas and Virginia, specializes in neurodiverse couples counseling and knows first-hand that these relationships can be everything a partner is looking for. She is happily married...

Anal sex is disgusting, it’s sinful, it’s wrong, it’s only for gay couples, it’s too painful, it won’t be pleasurable. Many individuals do not think of the anus as an erotic zone, but it can be. In a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Mahmoud Baydon, a Brazilian psychologist, certified sex therapist and online sex educator, talked about anal sex and how it can be erotic, painless and pleasurable for all couples. Mahmoud, through his thousands of social media communications, finds anal sex is one...

It may sound crazy, but gay men are lonely. Most of us think they are happy and lead a life filled with love, but this isn’t even close to the truth. Loneliness in gay men is reaching epidemic proportions. In a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast entitled “Gay men and loneliness,” host Joe Kort, PhD, psychotherapist and certified sex therapist, talked with an expert on the subject – Clinton Power – a relationship therapist based in Sydney, Australia, who specializes in couples therapy and...

Bad sex can destroy a loving relationship, but good sex cannot save a bad relationship. During a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Joe Kort, PhD, psychotherapist and certified sex therapist, spoke with his guest Barry McCarthy, PhD, a clinical psychologist, certified sex therapist and author of 14 books and 100 professional articles on sexuality. The topic: rekindling desire. Although sex should be a positive experience for couples, it often is not, Barry finds. Conflict, avoidance, lack of...

In his Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, host and certified sex therapist Joe Kort, PhD, talked with Richard Sprott, PhD, about kinky sex and self-exploration. Dr. Sprott is directing a research project that looks at social saturation, the postmodern self, and identity development. He has conducted extensive research on alternative sexualities and non-traditional relationships with a special emphasis on kink/BDSM sexuality, and polyamory or consensual non-monogamy. Dr. Sprott finds that the...

Are you surviving or thriving during this global pandemic? Are you living your best life right now? How are you responding to so many unforeseen changes? During the pandemic, many of us are facing unique challenges that test our resilience. George Khamis, therapist with The Center for Relationship and Sexual Health in Royal Oak, Michigan, discussed this subject on a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast hosted by Joe Kort, PhD, psychotherapist and clinical director of The Center for Relationship and...

Sex can, and should, be an access point to an immense internal world. In healing our connections to ourselves and others, we uncover a powerful way of being in our bodies, our relationships, and our lives. Finn Deerhart, sex counselor, coach, Tantra facilitator and public speaker, discussed this subject during a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast featuring host Joe Kort, PhD, psychotherapist, certified sex therapist and clinical director of The Center for Relationship and Sexual Health in Royal...