So many people who grew up in dysfunctional homes have no idea how to connect to their partners in a playful and sweet way without doing some huge gesture that can't be done very often (e.g, an expensive meal out). In this post I discuss a few little ways to make your partner feel loved, especially if you struggle with romance or daily connection! Buy my newest book! Couples You Meet In Counseling: 7 Common Relationship Dynamics That Sabotage Closeness: https://amzn.to/3WQoA8X Subscribe if...

In my wealthiest clients, the only metric that makes sense of what is meaningful is time. Since you can't buy more time, here are ways people try to approximate doing just that, and the ways of being that are associated with this realization. Buy my newest book! Couples You Meet In Counseling: 7 Common Relationship Dynamics That Sabotage Closeness: https://amzn.to/3WQoA8X Subscribe if you love the DPM show! https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/drpsychmomshow/subscribe and you'll get all...

Many very anxious people are consumed with fear of their own potential devastation or inability to cope if a bad thing were to happen to them. Some examples include: What if my partner was unfaithful or left me? What if my partner died? What if my child got ill? What if I was no longer physically attractive? What if I die earlier than expected? And so on. This episode discusses who falls prey to obsessing about these negative outcomes, why, and how to reframe these fears, guided by a...

This is stuff that securely attached people know from their upbringings and the rest of us have to learn. Can be a game changing paradigm shift! Subscribe if you love the DPM show! https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/drpsychmomshow/subscribe and you'll get all my awesome bonus episodes! Most recent subscriber episode: "Her Lack Of Desire Isn't Usually About You... But Sometimes It Is." For my secret Facebook group, the "best money I've ever spent" according to numerous members,...

Emotional labor isn't the problem guys. This term is so widely misused it's nuts. Here's who uses it and why. Subscribe if you love the DPM show! https://anchor.fm/drpsychmomshow/subscribe and you'll get all my awesome bonus episodes! Most recent subscriber episode: "Everything Does End, Sorry To Tell You." For my secret Facebook group, the "best money I've ever spent" according to numerous members,...

Many clients I see are unaware that they are anxious, which is why I write so many posts about how to recognize your anxiety. As I’ve often discussed, I grew up in an anxious home and have seen firsthand how anxiety is passed down through generations. This is why a mainstay of my clinical work is anxiety, including helping people recognize it and understand how it hurts kids, marriages, and of course your own happiness. In this post, I discuss one specific way of thinking that I’ve observed...

Many people can't put themselves out there and do scary things... until they figure out a motivator that makes sense to them. For many parents, this is their kids. For women, specifically, kids can help you try hard things in your career. And for men, the kids can be your motivator to be more emotionally present in your family. Also: how I use this frame myself! Subscribe if you love the DPM show! https://anchor.fm/drpsychmomshow/subscribe and you'll get all my awesome bonus episodes! Most...

Some people have very few social relationships and almost nobody, or truly nobody, that they feel close to except for their partner (and kids). Here's how this sets you up to fail in your marriage, and how to work on it for the betterment of yourself and your family! Subscribe if you love the DPM show! https://anchor.fm/drpsychmomshow/subscribe and you'll get all my awesome bonus episodes! Most recent subscriber episode: "There Are No Wizards." For my secret Facebook group, the "best money...

This episode dispels the myth that you are the sole reason that she doesn't like sex with you anymore. Here is a pep talk with concrete points to try if this is your situation... and don't worry, this doesn't mean you're "bad in bed"! Subscribe if you love the DPM show! https://anchor.fm/drpsychmomshow/subscribe and you'll get all my awesome bonus episodes! Most recent subscriber episode: "There Are No Wizards." For my secret Facebook group, the "best money I've ever spent" according to...

Expectations steal your joy and sabotage your relationships. In this episode, I discuss how unrealistic expectations and comparison points hurt your self-esteem, your relationship with your kids, and your marriage. And then I add in stuff about friendships for good measure! Subscribe if you love the DPM...

A book review of Bill Perkins' Die With Zero! Really interesting philosophically, and dovetails well with a lot of the internal work my clients do every day in session! Subscribe if you love the DPM show! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/drpsychmomshow/subscribe⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and you'll get all my...

A helpful reframe for empathy! What was your mom like at the age that you're expecting your wife to act so sexual, exciting, and dynamic? Probably not acting that way either. Subscribe if you love the DPM show! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/drpsychmomshow/subscribe⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and you'll...

There are ALWAYS dating options! Here's what the internet tells you and why it's wrong. Subscribe if you love the DPM show! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/drpsychmomshow/subscribe⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and you'll get all my awesome bonus episodes! Most recent subscriber episode: "There Are No...

I did a little video about this and I'm expanding on it in this episode... presenting the CCF (Child, Coworker, Friend) Reframe for how to think about your marital problems! This is easy to remember and can be a huge reality check if you think that you are behaving well in your marriage but you're still having issues for some unknown reason. Subscribe if you love the DPM...

Highly Sensitive People (HSP) definitionally feel things more intensely than others. Does this mean that HSP women are likelier to leave? Here's what I've seen in my practice! Subscribe if you love the DPM show! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/drpsychmomshow/subscribe⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and you'll get all...

Here's a terrifying thought... what if your wife had veto power over your work schedule??? Actually... this may be the best thing that ever happened to your marriage, and here's why! Also covered: who this works for and who it doesn't work for. Subscribe if you love the DPM...

Many guys think that doing chores or childcare together is inefficient, so they try to "optimize" by "dividing and conquering" chores, errands, gym time, and more. Then they are surprised when after many productive hours apart, their wife is not happy to reunite but feels disconnected and distant. Here's how to understand this and what to do instead! Subscribe if you love the DPM...

If you think your relationship doesn't feel "right" in some way, this is the episode for you. Relationship OCD is linked to anxiety in general, and can mean any obsessive thought about a relationship, including whether you are right for each other, whether your partner preferred a previous partner, whether YOU may have been better suited to someone else, and more. And here's how to distinguish between this and a healthy process of determining compatibility! Subscribe if you love the DPM...

What does anxiety look like in men? This discusses ways that anxiety shows up in males, as opposed to females, and can be a lightbulb moment for you! Listen up if you're rigid, difficult, have back or stomach pain, or your wife "walks on eggshells" around you!! Subscribe if you love the DPM...

In the Facebook group, someone was upset by a life choice that a friend made that didn't impact this person directly. Why do people get triggered by situations that don't involve them? Why do we get upset if someone makes a choice different from ours? And what can you do if this is always happening to you? Subscribe if you love the DPM...

Often, moms are harder on daughters and dads are harder on sons. Why does this happen? When is it okay and when does it become a problem? And what to do if you fight about this in your marriage! Subscribe if you love the DPM show! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/drpsychmomshow/subscribe⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and...

A commenter made a really smart analogy between post-ovulation phase for women and post-nut clarity for men. This episode can really lead to an epiphany that transforms your understanding of your wife! Subscribe if you love the DPM show! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/drpsychmomshow/subscribe⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and...

Why do some guys send dick pics? Why do some guys not understand foreplay? Why do some guys grab their wives' boobs out of nowhere? What does all this have to do with empathy? Buckle up and get your learning hat on! Subscribe if you love the DPM...

If you ask your wife too many questions, she doesn't want to have sex, talk, or be on the same planet as you! People ask questions compulsively for two main reasons... listen and learn what they are! Also: what to do instead. Subscribe if you love the DPM...

Certainly, desire decreases after the honeymoon stage, due to the biological end of the "drunk on new love" feeling. At this point, too many guys just blame biology for their wives not wanting sex. While I've spent a lot of time focusing on the biological changes, sometimes you're doing stuff that no woman in her right mind would find appealing. Listen and learn! Subscribe if you love the DPM...