Like many couples, Michelle and Dan struggle to communicate, especially when one of them is dealing with something difficult. Often when Michelle is upset, Dan feels completely lost on how he can help. Because he hasn't felt successful in all of his attempts, he winds up shutting down. He wants to fix, solve and solution, and it's just not what she needs. If you love someone, of course you want to help relieve them of their pain. But this race to relief is blocking something so important for both of them. We begin the conversation trying to understand why this pattern keeps happening. If you’re interested in being on the show, call 206 9 V-I-E-N-N-A. Leave a voice message with an alias and the best time to reach you. Guests will remain anonymous to listeners. You can order Vienna's National Best Seller 'The Origins of You' here and you can get a signed copy here.