Tara Costigan was murdered in 2015, one day after taking out a DVO on her ex-partner Marcus Rappel. The day he laid a finger on her was the day he murdered her. Before that the abuse had been verbal. Emotional.  Tara did everything ‘right’. She followed advice and took steps in the system designed to protect her, even though she was nervous about how he might react.  And then she died, in the most horrendous of ways, while cradling her one-week-old daughter. Her murder changed the fabric of Canberra and the conversation surrounding domestic violence. THE END BITS Subscribe to Mamamia Find out more about Mamamia's charity partner RizeUp Australia here. And if this episode has brought up anything for you or if you just feel like you need to speak to someone, call 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732). CREDITS Guest: Heidi Lemon author of The First Time He Hit Her Host: Gemma Bath Executive Producer: Gia Moylan Audio Producer: Scott Stronach GET IN TOUCH: Feedback? We’re listening! Email us at [email protected] or send us a voice note, and one of our Podcast Producers will come back to you ASAP. If any of the contents in this episode have caused distress, know that there is help available via Lifeline on 13 11 14 or Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636 Mamamia acknowledges the Traditional Owners of the Land we have recorded this podcast on, the Gadigal people of the Eora Nation. We pay our respects to their Elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures. Become a Mamamia subscriber: https://www.mamamia.com.au/subscribe See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.