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“I’ll start by saying I appreciate this show.
The last episode rubs me the wrong way.
I am in an emotionally/verbally abusive relationship. I was always apologizing for years and begging for forgiveness. I’ve been in therapy and have started standing up for myself. I don’t not grovel, apologize, or beg. I now tell him he is in the wrong when he’s abusive and point out he needs to change.
The episode basically says a victim will never blame the abuser and I think that is skewed and can lead to confusion.
A victim can be assertive, know it’s not them, call the abuser out for their behavior, and still be the victim.
At some point you realize that it is the abusers responsibility to get help and change and you stop fawning.
It is the abuser who is causing the relationship problems (I don’t mean normal relationship grievances of course - but the abuse cycle).
Can you clarify this to your audience? So this way if someone hears a victim “blaming” the abuser they don’t start to think the victim is actually the abuser. It is really hard to clarify as I’m sure my SO plays victim to his friend group as well.”
readbooksforsanity via Apple Podcasts ·
United States of America ·
06/06/24
More reviews of Love and Abuse
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“I’m really grateful to have found this podcast, as well as the Overwhelmed Brain. Paul is honest and it’s good to hear someone that talks about how they changed and what helped them change. He doesn’t pretend to be perfect. He acknowledges his past flaws. It’s very insightful.”
Guy Zipp via Apple Podcasts ·
United States of America ·
06/08/21
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“I JUST found this new podcast! So excited to listen! Thank GOD for Paul Colaianni ! He’s pioneering this much needed area , so much hidden abuse with few who ‘get it’ ... His first podcast the Overwhelmed Brain kept me sane and he literally helped me realize I should and could escape with my...”Read full review »
DarraeH via Apple Podcasts ·
United States of America ·
09/08/23
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“Listening to Paul be so raw and honest about his healing from being the toxic person in a relationship feels like a breath of fresh air. Not only am I able to look at more at the areas that I could still improve but it makes me feel heard in what I experienced in my own toxic relationships. A...”Read full review »
Legsmac via Apple Podcasts ·
United States of America ·
09/15/23
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