“I’ll start by saying I appreciate this show.
The last episode rubs me the wrong way.
I am in an emotionally/verbally abusive relationship. I was always apologizing for years and begging for forgiveness. I’ve been in therapy and have started standing up for myself. I don’t not grovel, apologize, or beg. I now tell him he is in the wrong when he’s abusive and point out he needs to change.
The episode basically says a victim will never blame the abuser and I think that is skewed and can lead to confusion.
A victim can be assertive, know it’s not them, call the abuser out for their behavior, and still be the victim.
At some point you realize that it is the abusers responsibility to get help and change and you stop fawning.
It is the abuser who is causing the relationship problems (I don’t mean normal relationship grievances of course - but the abuse cycle).
Can you clarify this to your audience? So this way if someone hears a victim “blaming” the abuser they don’t start to think the victim is actually the abuser. It is really hard to clarify as I’m sure my SO plays victim to his friend group as well.”
readbooksforsanity via Apple Podcasts ·
United States of America ·
06/06/24