This week I spiraled out with queer author and hilarious, deeply relatable person Marisa Crane! (I Keep My Exoskeletons To Myself) We talked internalized homophobia, being menaces in our twenties,  self-sabotage, parenting shame, botox and the horror of lying to Drew Barrymore, why it's so damn hard to give yourself the grace you freely give everyone else, the quiet shame of being a jock in the literary world, Rugby as an addictive self-punishment tool, and SO MUCH MORE. Plus, Marisa shares a shame story about having a history of infidelity in their relationships, feeling like they had really overcome that pattern, and then meeting their wife while they were both in relationships with someone else. We dove deep into what it's like to have their happiness tied to this reminder of one of their hugest sources of shame- and what it would take for them to finally forgive themself.    Follow Marisa on Instagram @marisa_crane, Twitter @mcrane_12 and TikTok @marisacranewrites. And buy their debut novel, I Keep My Exoskeletons To Myself! It's queer and dystopian and INCREDIBLE! GET AFTER IT! https://books.catapult.co/books/i-keep-my-exoskeletons-to-myself/   You can follow me on Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok @elykreimendahl, and the pod on Twitter and Instagram @podshamespiral, where I'm regularly posting fun video clips of especially juicy or hilarious moments from the episodes.   Audio Engineer/Editor: Sarah Gabrielli (check out her amazing podcast about the last lesbian bars in America @cruisingpod on Instagram and TikTok and listen here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/cruising-a-lesbian-bar-road-trip/id1585850925 Original Music: Shadwick Wilde, Instagram and Twitter: @shadwickwilde Cover Art: Cassidy Kulhanek, Instagram, Twitter and TikTok: @heavenlygrandpa New episodes every Tuesday! Don't forget to subscribe, review and please leave those five shining stars! twitter.com/podshamespiral instagram.com/podshamespiral instagram.com/elykreimendahl tiktok.com/@elykreimendahl twitter.com/elykreimendahl