Pete and Luke raise their heads from the overflowing Carabao trough to recap a chaotic night in England’s premier energy drink-adjacent sports competition. Spurs dished out some rock n’ roll hardcore football to send Man City packing - and Timo Werner scored. Yep, you read that right. Elsewhere, Man United’s players paid tribute to Erik ten Hag by smashing Leicester - even Casemiro had a good time - while a vintage Newcastle blew Chelsea’s back up boys away. The Carabao delivered once again,...

Banning Cristiano Ronaldo from getting his trainers, redoing the plumbing himself, pocketing a cool £15 million on departure… Turns out Erik ten Hag is actually a genius and so we’re now Team Erik. Today, Vish gives us his thoughts on the United situation alongside Marcus, Pete and Luke as we wonder whether anyone is capable of steering this lumbering behemoth and if INEOS are actually any good. Elsewhere, Rodri won the Ballon d’Or and Real Madrid were typically gracious in defeat and we...

Time for more Tuesday chat! Marcus, Jim and Vish look over Chelsea’s curiously impressive start, as their young players continue to kick on and Enzo Maresca looks to have built a cohesive plan - even while looking like a scuba diving instructor. Elsewhere, we wonder why the Newcastle project is stalling after an underwhelming few weeks, FIFA unveils yet ANOTHER competition and Snoop Dogg issues a come and get me plea for the ages. Find us on X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us...

The seemingly inevitable has happened: after just four wins from 14 games - and an hour after we left the studio - Erik ten Hag has lost his job. Spare a thought for Antony... Even though the Ramble Curse has struck once again, Marcus and Luke just happened to be in the office. So let’s get their reaction! Find us on X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected]. Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per...

Points shared at the Emirates but which side are happier? Today, Marcus, Jim, and Vish are here to unpick another fabulous weekend of Premier League action. Things also go from bad to worse for Man United, not only did they lose to West Ham but Man City have mugged them off ahead of tonight’s Ballon d’Or ceremony. Plus, we ring the barn burner alarm after Brentford and Ipswich complete a seven-goal thriller. Disclaimer: The curse on the Ramble has struck again. Emergency Erik ten Hag podcast...

Were the moon landings faked? Did aliens build the pyramids? Did Howard Webb intervene to get William Saliba sent off against Bournemouth? Philosophers and academics have long debated these events to find out the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. On today's Mailbag, Marcus, Luke and Andy explore football's growing conspiracy culture and find out what can be done about it. Find us on X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected]. Sign up to the...

Death, taxes and Jose Mourinho getting sent off on a big European night. The Special One played the hits against Man United and today Marcus, Luke and Andy are here to enjoy the music. Elsewhere, Andy explains why Arsenal have a lot on the line when they play Liverpool on Sunday. But don’t worry, we learn that Mikel Arteta has stolen Mauricio Pochettino’s lemons. Find us on X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected] Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for...

Liverpool travelled to the Red Bull Arena and left with all three points. Naturally, Pete is wearing his Monster Energy hat to celebrate. Today, he’s joined by famous Carabao man Luke Moore to count how many times Loïs Openda was caught offside. Elsewhere, Man City play the hits with a 5-0 win against Sparta Prague and José Mourinho wants another Premier League medal. COME ON! Find us on X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected] Sign up to the Football...

ASTON VILLA ARE TOP OF THE CHAMPIONS LEAGUE! Does that mean Emi Martínez gets a new trophy to hump? Today, Marcus, Andy, Jim and Vish commend Unai Emery for creating a team that looks comfortable among Europe’s best. Elsewhere, Mikel Arteta displays some more bizarre behaviour, a parrot gets a Spanish referee in trouble and Phil Neville wins his first trophy at Portland Timbers. Find us on X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected] Sign up to the Football...

Grandad Roy, come and help Uncle Marc, would you? Nottingham Forest beat Crystal Palace 1-0 and continued their remarkable defensive record, all while Chris Wood plays like prime Christian Vieri. But why is it all going wrong in south London? And can anyone tell Eze to stop shooting all the time? Marcus and Vish react to the Monday night football! Plus, the FA formally seek clarification that Gary O’Neil did indeed call them k***heads. Find us on X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us...

Arne Slot’s lot are still top of the table! Marcus, Luke, Vish and Pete talk through a pulsating Sunday afternoon showdown with Chelsea – but thankfully Pete won’t be revealing “everything that’s in his head”. One thing Vish reveals is his belief that Howard Webb should be completely naked if he sits in the stands at any Premier League game – for full transparency – after he caused a stir down in Bournemouth. Plus, Gary O’Neil wages war with little guys after Wolves concede a gutting late...

Right then, Tommy Tuchs has got the big job so now we wait for the inevitable chaos that trails in his path. It's going to be box office, but is the entertainment factor worth it? Marcus, Jim & Andy are here to debate whether it's time to bring back managerial double acts and which rules they reckon they could break if they played in the top flight. Plus, a nod to Alan Pardew. Lovely to get a mench in for Pards. Find us on X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us...

The Barclays is back! Marcus, Andy, Jim and Pete are fizzing at the prospect of a goalmongous return when Spurs play West Ham in the Premier League tomorrow lunchtime. Elsewhere, Marcus accuses Pete of making up managerial rumours. Does he have a point? Or is Pete just in the know... Join the Football Ramble WhatsApp Channel: https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VamKx7RL7UVMdlfanN0Q. Find us on X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected]. Sign up to the Football...

Today, we're bringing you a special teaser of what you can expect every week on the Football Ramble Patreon. For just $5 a month, you'll get an extended version of every Wednesday episode of the Ramble! It's called Ramble Uncut and it's full of all the stuff we would be talking about if football wasn't always getting in the way. You'll get correspondence from other Patreon subscribers, behind-the-scenes news and regular Pitbull updates. Just head to patreon.com/footballramble to...

“It’s difficult to believe, at this point, that the FA are in negotiations with Thomas Tuchel” - Luke Moore, 15th October 2024. Marcus, Luke and Jim are here to react to the news that Thomas Tuchel is the new England manager. Strap in… Find us on X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected]. Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: https://www.patreon.com/footballramble. Join the Football Ramble WhatsApp...

It’s a Lions Watch takeover! Marcus and Luke cast their deciding votes on the future of the England managerial post: has Lee Carsley passed the job interview? Does he even want to pass the interview? Has he even submitted his CV for said interview? They look back on the international break and England's performances, answer your questions, and discuss reports of the FA considering both Thomas Tuchel and Pep Guardiola. According to Luke, one’s using the England job as a negotiation tactic and...

Who's more confused, Lee Carsley or Pete Donaldson? A question which is in itself so confusing that we're really confused trying to answer it. All we know is that England won yesterday and Marcus, Luke, Vish and Pete are here to try and make sense of it all. Elsewhere, Scotland didn’t win at the weekend but there is a new pizza named after Scott McTominay and Billy Gilmour, so that's a victory of sorts. But the real winner from the weekend is, of course, League One Manager of the Month Steve...

It's the bloomin' weekend and luckily for you, it's full of Nations League excitement. Seriously though, the whole football calendar is an absolute mess. Marcus, Luke and Vish embark on the challenge of trying to fix the window, whilst also asking whether fans actually prefer boring football. Oh, and listener Charlie has a wedding conundrum that we're called into action for advice on. Find us on X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected]. Sign up to the...

Lee Carsley experimented with starting all the cooks for England and what transpired was one confusing broth. Today, Luke tells Marcus and Vish why England need a manager that is brave enough to drop some of England’s more talented players. Elsewhere, we celebrate Marcello Lippi’s birthday and is Ole Gunnar Solskjaer positioning himself to have another shot at the Man United job? We bloody hope so… Find us on X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: [email protected]. Sign...

Is that… a half fit Harry Kane trundling up the pitch? Oh YES! International football is back and England face Greece tonight! Marcus, Pete and Andy celebrate with wedding cake in the post (Marcus wishes), a sprinkling of David Beckham nostalgia, and some angry reviews of Andrés Iniesta’s vineyard to finish. Plus, Pete’s verdict on some wild fits in the French squad. Better than Harry Maguire’s ‘man accused of insider training’ chic, I suppose. Come join us! Find us...

Manchester City laid the smallest of gloves on the Premier League this week. But what does it all mean? Today, Marcus and Andy crossover to our official legal reporter Pete Donaldson for some fascinating insight into this new development. Elsewhere, Jurgen Klopp has somehow found the energy for a new job - a case of Red Bull will do that for you - and Andy explains the real reason why Man United appointed Ruud van Nistelrooy as Erik ten Hag’s assistant. Plus, Fizzer’s boys are on the...

This is a podcast we think you’re going to love. Our friends at Stak have made a unique six-part documentary about hooliganism in English football. For decades, it dominated headlines, merging the two things England loves most: football and fear. But football hooliganism didn’t disappear.  This series digs deeper – beyond the tabloid articles, beyond the stereotypes – to understand what first attracts people to this subculture and why it’s forced its way back into our society in 2024. Today,...

Well, it looks like Erik Ten Hag has bought himself a bit of time following one of the dullest games the Premier League has ever seen. In other words, exactly what the big man needed. But in better news for the Dutchman, Ten Hag wasn't the biggest bald fraud at Villa Park on Sunday. Nope, that honour would go to his ballboy doppelgänger who we're calling Timmy (what's a grown man doing in that role anyway?). Marcus, Jim and Pete are here to dissect all the rest of the Premier League action...

Is it Tottenham’s fault that people call 2-0 a dangerous scoreline? Today, even Jim admits to Marcus and Pete that he has some sympathy for Spurs fans after they gave up a 2-0 lead against Brighton. Elsewhere, Adama Traoré gets the Nathan Redmond treatment after he broke London speed limits against Man City on Saturday. Plus, Andy Carroll is doing King and Country proud over in France. One last England call-up? Who says no… Find us on X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us...