Tom and Sam choose whether they'd have a hot, smart or kind child. Also a quick lump update at the end. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sam immediately got what he wished for, and Tom shares a touching story from his teenage years (as in the story involves tocuhing). See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Update from the Melbourne International Comedy Festival! All the things that have happened to Tom are wing related. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Tom meets the Premier, Sam meets the PM. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Tom has an encounter with news reporters at the beach and everyone wants to put their mitts on Taunton. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We recall getting abused by a teen and make a startling discovery about our intro music. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We're back to ranking animals based on famousness and emotional resonance. This time the rankings are based on audience feedback. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sam and Tom discuss what item they'd take back to medieval times. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We discuss parking fine gambling and Tom gets spat on. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Tom and Sam decide on the top 10 animals. A lot to discuss which is why it's our longest episode yet. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Tom needs help conversing with other Australian men. Will he continue to say "oh legend thank you"?  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We're back! We talk about why the Trolley Problem could be a Trolley Opportunity. Then Tom pitches Conor McGregor roast jokes until Sam loses interest. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Tom has been disrespected by another doctor. Sam is addicted to chatting in his new office. There's even some whispering. This episode has it all.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Apologies for the hiatus! In this one we talk Christmas presents and bring you some very sad news: more Wigglification. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We hear Sam's red-eye flight story and argue whether most highway signs in the world are green. Looking back I should probably have given Sam more credit for heaps of the signs we Googled being green.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sam reveals he has shirts that get stinkier at faster rates than other shirts. He also doesn't know what sarcasm is. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We argue about the Bermuda Triangle, then Sam makes an embarrassing mistake. Sorry about the audio quality, Tom will be back in Sydney soon. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Is it possible to create the perfect relationship with algorithms? Are moral people just wimps? We answer these questions then we have an arguments about prams. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We're back! Apologies for the hiatus. We talk primary school bullies, Sam's emotionally manipulative mechanic and the Queen's untimely death. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We discuss World Idol, what you're morally obliged to do if a friend buys you a scratchie and it wins, and Sam (hungover) recaps Splendour. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We talk Splendour in the Grass, LIV Golf (abridged version only) and then Sam has a revelation about the stand up tour he did in India.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We talk sunglasses, the casino and the Wild Wild West. Some of the coolest topics imaginable. Then Tim Hewitt makes an appearance and barely pays attention. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Tom and Sam stick up for conversations about the weather. Sometimes it can be fascinating and actually a great way to form a connection. We also propose a new kind of martial arts training. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sam tells us what he'd do with a billion dollars. We explore the ins and outs of a smelly audience member at Guy Montgomery's special taping. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.