How routines help the mental loadIn our house, there's two versions of the mental load argument. Version 1 was "you just need to ask for help" now we're on to what I like to call 2.0 of the argument: "we just need a better routine". This statement sounds more progressive. It's action-oriented and inclusive. I said "we!". But here's the thing, routines aren't the entire solution. They don't absolve your partner from being an equal participant in whatever task needs to get done that you're...

How does this affect mom's careers? Those who are able to put in more time, more travel, be available at all kinds of hours, etc. are more likely to get the big clients, the promotions, the career awards.But it’s not just about the time or physical availability; the mental load also affects mom’s careers because it makes it harder to focus and do deep work.  “When a man expects his partner to ask him to do things, he’s viewing her as the manager of household chores. The problem is that...

The Mental Load: Why saying "Just ask for Help" is wrongOn this hot take, Katlynn discusses why men in relationships should not say "you just need to ask for help". This makes women feel: undervaluedunappreciatedtaken for granted The reality is that you chose to do this life together, so saying that she just needs to ask for help makes the mental load her problem, indicates that the things she thinks about are her job only and let's her know you don't think of them as mutual chores to share.

How the Patriarchy Affects the Mental LoadThis isn't a "f**k the patriarchy/white straight men suck" episode. This is an acknowledgment and discussion of facts. The facts are, that the patriarchy exists; by nature, it oppresses women and people of color; and it needs to be reformed. (which would then make it something new altogether) Society and institutions are made to evolve as they learn and I think we've learned enough about the patriarchy to make it clear that a lot needs to change. And,...

Shorter episodes and weekly hot takes are coming later this fall! The Mental Load will drop new season every summer and winter. This gives Angie and Katlynn time to research and create quality content during the off-season. Thanks to everyone who's supported us so far on this journey, we're excited to bring you some amazing guests and conversations soon.

Millennial women are getting divorced at higher rates and the reason is because of the mental load. The reality is women are not attracted to men we have to mother. We’re taught when we’re looking for relationships to look for someone we can take of. But that shit doesn’t change once you get married. Today we're joined by Felicia Kashevaroff. Owner of Tend Task and a divorced mom. We dive in deep to what it's like balancing the mental load as a single mom and how the mental load contributes...

What is the dad privilege?The dad privilege, maternal gatekeeping and the mental load.What is dad privilege? The internet says: it’s when dads are treated like heroes and get praised for doing the same shit that moms do every f*****g day. Dads get praised for just showing up. “Aw, you planned dinners for the whole week!” “Aw, you brought your kids to the birthday party!” “Aw, you gave the baby a bath!” -_- We also say: it’s the ability to just do things in their lives without considering the...

What are we teaching young boys and young girls about the mental load?What do our kids learn from watching their moms carry the mental load? One goal of this podcast is to break a generational cycle.  What are we worried our sons are learning when we bear the mental load? "A popular squabble in my household stems from the fact that I bear the bulk of the mental load. My spouse—who’s a very involved and participatory partner—is still the guy that will make a plan to go to the playground with...

Advice to fix the mental loadHow women can lighten the mental loadWelcome, Melissa Bloom, energy coach! The most popular question we get is "how do I fix the imbalance? how do I get rid of or at least lighten the mental load?" It's a challenging issue because it has so many different facets to it. Enter, Melissa. As an energy coach, Melissa works with all kinds of clients to find balance and feel joy in their lives. The mental load, as we all know, takes a heavy toll on women personally and...

How does gender programming affect the mental load?All of this to say that women are taught from an early age that our worth and value comes from the house we keep and the kids we raise. Dads are taught that their job is done as soon as they’ve provided shelter and money for the family.  What this looks like in Women:  Programmed to think self worth comes from the house we keep and the kids we raiseAre taught to be the caretakers (therefore we prioritize this within our do to list)Nice vs...

Advice on how to change the mental load from a marriage therapist.The effect the mental load has on marriages and how to have the conversation with your spouse. It's (one) of the episodes you all have been waiting for. How do you have the mental load conversation with your spouse and create meaningful change? Licensed therapist, Kristen Sanchez, takes us through the process of: having the conversationexamining your own contributions approaching your partnercreating lasting changethe impact...

What is the impact of the mental load on women's careers?Invisible labor for women at work How did we get here? The mental load has been a generational issue but it didn't become obvious to everyone until Covid where women suddenly found themselves working from home, parenting 24/7 and teaching their children. While men picked up more duties around the house, it was not enough to radically shift the load around; the invisible labor still stayed with women. What’s going on? Women are expected...

What is the mental load?How does the mental load affect women?Is the mental load a real thing? And if it is, what is its impact on women? The mental load is all the “invisible work” that needs to be done to keep daily life going This includes cognitive and emotional needs as well. Cognitive labor involves thinking of all the practical needs and logistics and emotional labor involves managing and regulating everyone’s emotions to create the most successful outcome for everyone.  Four...

Changing the mental loadHelping moms understand and balance the mental load of raising kidsDo you ever feel like you want to scream because you do all the stuff and things related to running your household and raising kid and yet nobody seems to notice how hard you work? We do. We're Angie and Katlynn. Two millennial moms brought together by our spitfire daughters. We're here to explore why the mental load exists, what keeps it in place and how we can change it to create a better, more...