It's finally here, the last episode of The Slump, all 2 hours and 6 minutes of it. Featuring classics like Condiment Corner, Cyberdesk, Kickster Watch, and even a new advert for Deep Voiced Anthems. It's long enough to ensure that by the time you've finished listening, you'll never want to hear us again, and thus your withdrawal will be complete. Thanks to everyone for your listenership over the years, it's been really fun. We've been fairly mediocre. Bye bye.

We're back with a microslump, and some pretty massive news, (and it's not that we're pregnant, even though Ian said it was).

It's our Christmas episode and you know what that means... robots! Also bad Christmas songs. And Scott Stapp. Christmas.

Like a spaceman from afar in a Christmas song by Chris De Burgh, the Slump 307 has arrived from space (the internet), to bring you good cheer. This isn't the official Christmas episode, but we still talk about quite a lot of Christmas stuff. And Japanese sweets, we talk about those too. And tin cans for idiots. Bye.

The Slump is back, having not been there for a week, and the relief amongst the population is palpable, we imagine. With Brendan off exploring Asia, we have An Italian join us in the studio to help out, but fear not Bren-fans, because he's still here, with a thrilling Asian travelogue. It's quite literally a podcast, so listen good.

This week there are discussions about testosterone, Coca-Cola, and other curious substances. Actually, those are the main two substances. There might be others, I can't remember now. Anyway, it was fun at the time. We hope you enjoy it too.

Quizzes, Saints and Bees. A sentence you can sing to the tune of Gypsies Tramps and Thieves by Cher if you like (because it would work well). More importantly, a few topics that we discuss on the Slump this week. Also, Barry Scott gets talked about. Think that's it. Bye.

Dan and Brendan return to talk into a microphone about things that vaguely interest or amuse them both. Things like a big pretend moon, a dress made of human hair, and a purse made from a dog's head. And those are all genuine topics. Ian didn't return to talk into a microphone as he wasn't there that day, but we've checked and he's fine.

Hello you. Another episode of the Slump, ripe for the listening. This week: underfloor heating, amnesia, and the unwelcome return of the CyberDesk jingle.

It's a phrase that's increasingly-used these days: This week it's a semi-planned podcast. But don't fret, because if you enjoy discussions about cranes, taps, names and the Backstreet Boys being back, then you'll still find much to enjoy here. Bye.

It's Slump 300, or as Dan called it at one point "The 300th anniversary of the Slump" idiot. Anyway, due to laziness and busy-ness, it's not particularly different to a normal Slump, although there are more fanfares and it's a bit longer. And we say "300" a lot. Thanks to everyone who's ever listened ever, we hope this doesn't put you off listening in the future.

The boys are back in town, though much less rowdy than the ones in the song that I took the initial bit of this sentence from. Actually, Brendan was quite rowdy this week. Some might say disruptive. It's fine though, we're over it. This week, we discussed Italians, eggs, and what the hell happens at Screwfix Live.

Last week Brendan struck out with an outrageous promise and this week we make good on that promise, because that's what we do. We stick to our word. Unlike SOME people. I have no-one specifically in mind, but it's true that some people don't stick to our word. We do stick to our word though. Podcast.

A new Slump is here, with two people talking: One called Ian, one called Dan (Brendan was off sick). They discuss lasers, Italians, and ridiculous high end fashion. Listen, on some kind of commute perhaps.

This week's episode is a few days late. Mind you, what's the point of being called The Slump if you're relentlessly punctual eh? Anyway, inside there's a song, a long advert and all manner of other things. However, something is missing...

Art and installations, feeding croissants to waterfoul, boiling rubber eggs, going on a journey with Hotpoint. Right now these are but words to you, but upon listening to the 295th episode of the Slump, you shall become enlightened in their meaning.

The chaps have been out for a team-building exercise, by which we mean they went to some pubs. And they've strengthened their bonds to such an extent that they decided to sit in a studio for a while, talking about topics as diverse as chess, delinquent drivers, and more that I can't remember as I type this.

It's a bit of a different Slump this week, as due to an accidental non-pressing of a crucial button, we didn't actually record the podcast. To make up for it, we did a new podcast but as a Facebook live video thing, so you can watch us instead. Then we realised that a lot of people won't bother doing that, so we've taken the audio from that and put it here. So it's a bit like a podcast and a bit not. You should watch the Facebook thing anyway, cos it's like we're on TV, and you can...

Dan's gone all louche, swanning about town like an oligarch's plaything, Ian's been to Sweden, and Brendan has just been normal. There is talk of condiments, a strange McDonalds Robin Hood, and a whole heap of passive aggression from Dan towards the others.

Ian is in Sweden hunting Daim bars this week, and without his calming influence, Dan and Brendan get a bit more passive aggressive than usual. It makes for a palpable frisson which can only add to your enjoyment of this podcast. Topics this week include Dacia's advertising, insects, and some other stuff that I can't remember right now because I'm tired. Just listen, it doesn't make any difference if you know what we talk about beforehand. Thanks.

It's a landmark episode, as we're just ten away from a big round number, so we celebrated in the only way we know how - by talking rubbish with slightly patchy sound quality. In more detail, this week Dan discovered a superpower, we map the UK in condiments, Ian is a traitor (he's not, we all support his new endeavours), and someone's re-invented something that didn't need to be re-invented.

Parts of this Slump went out of date by the time we'd made it, and I don't mean Condiment Corner. I'm talking about the various references to the football, as this was recorded before our brave boys left the World Cup. However, it doesn't make much difference and there's much to distract you from all things football-y.

This podcast was meant to come out on Friday, yet here I am, uploading it on Monday morning. For many of you this won't matter at all, and for those of you for whom it does matter, well I'm sorry you had to wait three days to get your Slump fix. However, with topics of conversation including a big letter "H", how to get the most from your ketchup, and much more besides, I'm sure you'll forgive the delay in creating such vital content.

We've got WORLD CUP FEVER! Or it might be allergies. Either way there's football chat, condiment chat, and much, much less in this week's edition of someone's favourite podcast.

Is margarine a condiment? Is it possible to stretch a footballing metaphor too far? Is a smell-based alarm clock a good invention? The quick answer to all these questions is: No, yes and no, but you'll have much more fun listening to the long, rambling answers, which is basically what this podcast is.