Bullying is a widespread problem that can have a devastating, psychological impact on victims. With the explosion of social media and the internet, bullying can now happen both in public spaces and at our fingertips. Kendall Long is a fan favorite from ABC's Bachelor franchise and co-host of podcast "Little Curiosities with Kendall Long." In this episode, Kendall opens up about her history with being bullied and how her loved ones supported her through these difficult experiences.  Check...

How do you show someone you love them? How does someone else make you feel loved in return? In 1992, Gary Chapman made "love languages" a household concept, proposing that we all have five main ways we prefer to give and receive love.  In this episode, we discuss the five love languages and tips for how to show love according to each language. We also review the research on this topic and apply the science to our understanding of love languages.  Gary Chapman's "The Five Love...

Falling in love can be one of the most invigorating yet terrifying experiences of our lives. But what is it, really? When can we trust the fall and when should we stay cautious? In this episode, we discuss the science of falling in love and by reviewing some theories from psychological research. We also discuss the experiences of falling in loves from our own lives and evidence-based tips to understanding its impact on our well-being.  Resources: Aron, A., Paris, M., & Aron, E. N....

It's a sad reality that many cultures promote ideal body types that we never seem to achieve. In this episode, we discuss body image issues: what they are, where they come from, and tips for protecting your mental health from them. We also discuss our personal relationships with body image from the perspective of race and family values. Check out: Alleva, J. M., Sheeran, P., Webb, T. L., Martijn, C., & Miles, E. (2015). A meta-analytic review of stand-alone interventions to improve body...

In every episode, we talk about people struggling with mental health, and we are no exception. Kibby has been dealing with postpartum depression (PPD), exacerbated by identity shifts and sleep deprivation that are common with new parents. In this episode, we talk about Kibby's personal experience with depression and how it directly affected her relationship with Jacqueline. We share what steps Kibby's taking to recovery that are often recommended to those with PPD. Check out: Sarah Bossio...

The words of Thai Massage Master Pichest, we need to learn to "listen to body." Trauma and other emotions live in the body, sometimes sending us important signals through our physical sensations and physical health. In this episode, we talk about the magical connection between the mind and the body. Kibby also reminisces about her yoga teaching and Thai massage days when she learned the healing power of the body in the middle of a rice patty in Chiang Mai. Check out: Van der Kolk, B. (2014)....

How can sexuality, spirituality, and mental health intersect and develop together? In this episode, we interview the first openly trans and nonbinary pastor of the Presbyterian Church, Jess Cook. We discuss gender, including how Jess came to identify as nonbinary, early signs that they were genderqueer, and how friends and family can help their loved ones struggling with gender dysphoria— and how they can manage their own complex feelings. We also discuss how Christianity came to exclude...

Can money buy happiness? Maybe! Financial stress is a major contributor to serious mental health issues, especially depression and anxiety. But the numbers on your bank statement are not the only things that determine your psychological wellbeing. In this episode, we discuss the research on the effect of money and financial hardship on mental health and happiness. We also walk through one framework for how to boost your financial coping skills with your loved ones. Frankham, C., Richardson,...

What if we told you that our brains can shut down to protect themselves? When we face intensely scary or overwhelming experiences, sometimes we disconnect from the present as a coping mechanism. This is called dissociation, a process of disconnecting from present experiences like your thoughts, feelings, memories, your body, or even reality itself. In this episode, we discuss the different types of dissociation, what it feels like, and how we help ourselves and others during these...

Emotional abuse can be the sneakiest form of abuse because sometimes we're not even sure it's happening. A slightly sarcastic insult, a veiled threat, or a judgment on your intentions, emotional (or"psychological") abuse is harder to detect than physical violence, but can wreak havoc on your mental health for years. In this episode, we describe what emotional abuse is and what are its long term effects. Check out the Emotional Abuse Questionnaire McMahon, K., Hoertel, N., Wall, M. M.,...

When someone is diagnosed with a chronic mental or physical health challenge, it creates a host of difficulties for his or her loved ones: What does it mean to live with a new diagnosis? How do we cope together? Should we hold them to the same level of expectation or accommodate for their new limitations? Dr. Kate Lund is a licensed clinical psychologist, peak performance coach, best-selling author and TEDx speaker. In this episode, Dr. Lund describes what it means to be resilient, drawing on...

You and your loved ones may find yourselves making the same mistakes in love over and over again: avoiding commitment, choosing the wrong partner, analyzing and obsessing over every text, etc. Attachment theory taught us that we may have particular patterns in relationships, whether they're secure or insecure. However, are we doomed to make the same mistakes for the rest of our lives? Thankfully, Dr. Catherine Sanderson reassures us that we aren't! In this episode, we discuss how we can...

Whether we're aware of it or not, we're constantly judging things are good or bad, valuable or worthless, cool or not cool. Judging ourselves and others is such a common phenomenon, but it can lead to significant mental health and relationship issues. In this episode, we discuss being judgmental, what function it serves and how it can impair our wellbeing. We also discuss tips for how to be less judgmental of ourselves or our loved ones. For more info, check out:...

Is your loved one an expert ghoster or the first one to run from a social situation? People with avoidant personality disorder (AVPD) are not just shy or a little aloof, but avoid relationships and social situations in order to hide a deep sense of inadequacy. In this episode, we describe what AVPD is, how it's different from similar disorders like social anxiety, how it's treated, and tips for loved ones of people with AVPD. Read more about AVPD here: ​Weinbrecht, A., Schulze, L.,...

Do you have a loved one who is always the life of the party, everyone's best friend, and a "drama queen"? If so, they may have a touch of histrionic personality disorder! In this episode, we describe what histrionic personality disorder is and how it could be difficult for loved ones. Then, Kibby has a crushing realization about her own history with histrionic personality disorder and loses track of everything after that. Read more about HPD here: ​Pfohl, B. (1991). Histrionic personality...

From Patrick Bateman, to Walter White, to Elizabeth Holmes, we're fascinated by people with antisocial personality disorder. Although, when we toss around similar terms like "psychopath" or "sociopath," it's hard to know what this disorder really is or even how to spot it in our loved ones. In this episode, we define what antisocial personality disorder is and how it relates to psychopathy and sociopathy. We also share examples from popular culture and our personal lives as well as answer fan...

We all know that high self-esteem is supposed to be good, but what is it, anyway? Is it just feeling good about yourself? What happens if you or a loved one has low self-esteem? In this episode, we define self-esteem and discuss an interesting theory of how self-esteem is a "sociometer" of our value in society. From this perspective, we give tips on how to boost self-esteem in yourself and your loved ones. Read more about the Sociometer Theory of Self-Esteem For more info, check out:...

Convinced your loved one (or unloved one) is a narcissist but can't really tell? Narcissistic behavior can be hard to spot these days as it often shows up as expressions of shame, hurt, or even feeling like a victim. Vulnerable, or "covert" narcissism can be harder to identify than the arrogant, showy grandiose version but it can be just as damaging to loved ones. In this episode, we describe vulnerable/covert narcissism in depth and how to tell if your loved one is showing signs of this...

People often say that becoming a parent is "the hardest thing" but also "the most joy you'll ever experience." What the hell does that even mean? As Kibby just became a new mom only a few weeks ago, she breaks down why having a newborn can be both amazing and challenging. We also discuss how crucial loved ones are during this time and how you can support a friend or family member who just became a parent. For more info, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com Follow us on Instagram:...

When you go through a serious break up, we often rebound into another relationship to ease the heartbreak. At this time, your loved ones may give you unsolicited advice about rebounding, such as "yes, get back out there!" or "no, take time to be single." What's the right answer? Is it good or bad to get into a rebound relationship right after a big break up? In this episode, we discuss the different reasons why someone might rebound and the pros and cons of this decision. For more info,...

We always have to make difficult decisions in romantic relationships, such as whom to choose, whether we should commit to someone, or when to leave. Although loved ones can sometimes want to weigh in on our difficult romantic decisions, it's hard for them to know exactly how to help. In this episode, we discuss Jacqueline's recent difficult decision to break off her engagement, what lead up to the decision, and the role that her loved ones played. We also share insights from the research on...

We wrap up season 2 by reflecting on our episodes that focused on relationships, emotions and skills we can use to change our unhealthy patterns. Both of us have gone through our own personal, journeys with love, pregnancy, engagements, conflicts and intense feelings during this season. In this vulnerable final episode, we discuss lessons learned in our personal lives and on this podcast. We look forward to joining you all again for Season 3 this fall! For more info, check out:...

Only one basic emotion has the unique position of being one of the seven deadly sins and a criteria for a serious personality disorder: Envy! Envy is a feeling that comes from a desire to have what someone else has. Although it can motivate us to compete for resources and power, it can of course have an ugly side when it tips into aggression. In this episode, we discuss what envy is, who struggles with it, and tips from CBT for how to overcome it. For more info, check out:...

A little flare of jealousy when someone flirts with your partner may be exciting once in a while, but it can damage a relationship when it becomes intense or consuming. Unhealthy or "morbid" jealousy can reach levels of obsessive suspicions, controlling behaviors, checking emails and social media, or even violence. In this episode, we discuss unhealthy forms of jealousy, who is most likely to suffer from jealousy, and tips for improving a jealousy-ridden relationship. For more info, check...

A common question we get is "what to do with the Fox News dad?" In other words, how do we maintain our relationships with our loved ones during this time of social divide and polarization? In this episode, we discuss these issues with Jared Glenn, who evolved from a life as a professional fighter to a historian, academic, writer, and advocate for youth through the All Stars Project. Jared shares insights from his personal and professional experiences with racial, political and economic social...