CEDRIC DIGGORY-DOO!! The boys look into a new problematic British children's author, and for once it's not JK. The merits of slaughtering animals on live TV is also discussed and a Pottefile has painstakingly put together an amazing audio package for your listening pleasure.

With just over a week to go before the US presidential election, it’s fair to say we’re almost as sick of talking about Trump and Harris by now as we are Harry Potter… But our Hagridlection 2024 coverage wouldn’t be complete without briefly discussing Tucker Carlson’s deranged rally address, Obama's pretentious summer playlists, and Trump’s admiration for pro golfers’ giant hogs.    Plus we devise a plan to breathe life into some new half-baked seggies (and revive some old favourites) before...

Without wanting to be crass, this week we discuss Lidia Thorpe’s balls of steel, our three limp penises, and put out the call to the listeners for some flappy tales. We also meet a mysterious new character Criag Philpott!

Unbelievably, it's 6 years to the day since we started the pod!! And with only 20 or so pages left we simply can’t afford to waste a single moment…That’s why we spent our precious time this week discussing the lost art of chimney sweeping, consuming human excrement, sex pests on onlyfans and of course the entire discography of Kate Ceberano

Nathan is off sick, but you know Droo and Riordan had to spit lava in the booth! This week, we scope out our competition by going through every podcast on the Spotify charts and declaring them all bad. We also discuss old man sex toys and help Kasey Chambers with a question she’s been wrestling with for decades.

MCGONE GIRL: curse you Father Time! How many more beloved HP stars will we have to bury before we finish this godforsaken pod?! Hopefully not too many especially considering our tribute to the late Dame Maggie Smith is even more shoddy and offensive than usual. We also have some timely advice for our Gen Z listeners, a long overdue condemnation of our Gen X listeners, and hear about Droo’s ‘fish out of water’ trip to Ibiza.

This week we discuss the beatification of Fatman Scoop and reflect on the life, career and hog of Cuban enigma/ man's best friend Pitbull! We also bring you the latest Republican political drama that is truly obscene even by their lofty standards. And impossibly dry Greek and Italian biscuits finally get their krumuppance...

You would be well within your rights to judge us for yet another extended/ unexplained absence… but before you do, just know that this time there is a truly shocking and legit explanation (for some of it) and yes it does involve the movie Alien: Romulus. But the upside is we have plenty to catch up on including the strange tale of a fox doing coke, the BOOM period of Christian-presenting rock bands, and another Trump assassination attempt with a decidedly Looney Tunes vibe about it. And we...

BREAKING, BAD: what better way to extinguish our fleeting sense of national pride than to relive Olympics MVP Raygun’s truly mortifying breakdancing performance. And as the Paris Games draw to a close we reflect on the great nation of France - truly a land of contrasts… terrible, terrible contrasts… And in a particularly sprawling pod even by our standards we also touch on the demise of hot guys, JK’s awful boxing take, rising terror/ promiscuity levels, and eating bear meat. 

THE BIG O: On this page we discuss all the action and drama from week 1 of the Paris 2024 Games including Droo's crippling gold addiction, the most satisfying countries to crush in athletic competition, some highly questionable commentary performances, and a surprise appearance from Papa Smurf. And for even more inane coverage make sure you check out Riordan’s new pod ‘The Gaymes’!

Plenty to discuss again this week as we review the latest episode of US politics - did the writers jump the shark by killing off one of the main characters? How will the new Trump v Harris storyline play out? And what do we make of the zany cameos from Hulk Hogan, Matt Gaetz and and other RNC freaks? Plus find out what Matt Damon, Judge Judy and Kim Jong Il all have in common…

EMERGENCY BROADCAST! Guys seriously stop what you’re doing and listen to this pod. No time to explain but something BIG just happened to former President Donald Trump over the weekend. Click here to find out what! And with turbulent times ahead, we seek out inspiration this week from some of history’s most inspiring and iconic symbols of peace

This week we receive a masterclass in the art of persuasion from some of society’s most obstinate, pig-headed mf’s - namely Jetstar cabin crew, heavily demented presidential candidates, and middle aged white guys who love using the N word. We also investigate jazz musicians’ offensive nicknames, bring back some horribly outdated slurs, and dedicate a brand new game to the one and only Minerva McGonagall

HOT RODENT SUMMER: It's fair to say that gaunt, spindly vermin-boys like Timothee Chalamet, Jeremy Allen White and Peter Pettigrew have never been more popular in our culture… so what better way to celebrate the ‘hot rodent’ phenomenon than by pitching our new summer blockbuster featuring an all-star cast of ratboys! We also discuss different academic approaches to dick pick historiography before Riordan regails us with yet another unbelievable work-related mishap 

XXX FACTOR: Has sleazy record producer/ judgemental grouch Simon Cowell been secretly controlling global horniness for the last two decades? We think so.. And with the State of Origin series opener only a week away, we could ill-afford to have our preparations interrupted this week by creepy AI journalists, international meth traffickers, classic Hollywood racists and affable plumbers 🚽 

In light of Vincent Namatjira’s controversial portrait of Gina Rinehart we simply have to ask - does Australia have a disproportionately fugly ruling class? We also discuss how rock and roll can be used to fight racism directly caused by rock and roll, as well as beer bongs, foot fetishes, daddy/ daughter revenge and more of the standard fare really…

Who is the greatest rapper of our generation? What is the future of AI in music? And can the power of rock and roll save the world from ecological disaster? This week the esteemed musicologists of the PMP pod turn their minds to these and many more questions as we tell you everything you need to know about the state of modern music.  PLUS find out the hottest new baby names of 2024 (the answers may surprise you!)

Get ready for some truly groundbreaking comedy this week as dedicate a good 20 mins discussing what’s the deal with airlines?!? We also discuss some bold fashion choices in the wake of the garish spectacle that was Met Gala 2024, dig even further into US politicians’ weird relationships with dogs and propose some ironic punishments for the entire Stefanovic clan

Make sure you tune in to this week’s pod to avoid making an EMBARRASSING SOCIAL FAUX PAS as we help you navigate the perilous gray areas surrounding proper dinner party etiquette, the political implications of brutally euthanising your childhood pet, and the appropriate circumstances to bring a newborn baby to an orgy.  Also an all-time beloved seggie finally faces the chopping block…

ACTUAL TRIGGER WARNING The Bruce Is Loose! That is to say, the Bruce is a rapist. Nathan's away but that wasn't going to stop Droo and Riordan spending 50 minutes almost exclusively talking about one of the great Krummupance slash own goals ever witnessed. So roll away the (Philosophers) stone and crack open the Defamber of secrets, because as we always say, you can't defame a rapist.

EGG ON OUR NORKS: after unfortunate new details about Kate Middleton's condition came to light this week, will the PMP boys reconsider their position and perhaps walk back some of their recent 'defamebery' content, or foolishly double down in true PMP style? We also try to diagnose Hagrid's learning difficulties and serve some much needed Viktor Krumuppance to the mouth-breathing degenerates running around at Channel 7.

Consider this week’s pod our love letter to SHAME 🥰 🥰 a much maligned and misunderstood virtue, and possibly our last defence against the depraved horrors of tiktok culture...  We also discuss the follies of 'whistlecore' music, spicy food, horny AI, and rugby league entrepreneurship.

This week we try our hand at some Jungian dream analysis, delving deep into Riordan’s subconscious to find a surprise appearance from Michael Jordan and an even more surprising appearance from long-forgotten relic of Australian comedy - Akmal!  We also pay tribute to a beloved Harry Potter character who was the victim of an all-time snubbing at this year’s Oscars, dispel the myth that New Zealanders are funny and, in the wake of the Sam Kerr controversy, ask the timely question - is racial...

INTERNATIONAL MAN OF MYSTERY: this week we reveal the identity of the top Australian politician accused of being a Chinese spy, and while he may not be handsome or suave or even vaguely mobile like 007, he does have at least as much gross sex with foreign ladies 😬 We also talk about Churchill’s legendary love of platypuses and stimulants and Columbus’s legendary love of ramen and anime, as well as Diddy’s dastardly deeds!