Episodes
CW: death; brief mention of disordered eating
What happens when someone dies? How do you talk to someone who's lost a parent? What's wrong with the word 'talent'? Do you take on work that makes you uncomfortable? Why are we so scared of Freshers Week? We answer all these questions with absolute authority this week on Things Musicians Don't Talk About!
Grab a cuppa, walk the dog/child, endure the commute, or simply rawdog this episode. We have a chinwag, a catchup and put the world to rights...
Published 11/10/24
The start of an unedited series of podcasts.
TW: mental illness
Hattie shares the story of her 2017 nervous breakdown and reads a blog she wrote about it back in August. She also answers questions about breakdowns and whether she worries about them returning
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Published 10/31/24
When cellist Matthew Barley was 16 he tried to take his own life following a drug-induced psychotic episode. He then went on to channel everything into music until in 2019 the trauma of the event resurfaced.
We speak to Matthew about his experience of psychosis, looking back on his experiences and the process of trauma therapy and the impact of ayahuasca. He takes us through writing music for his new album based on the events and discusses the way the classical music world views mental health...
Published 09/27/24
This was a big one for Things Musicians Don't Talk About: our first live show!!!! We are so grateful to the London Podcast Festival for inviting us to take the stage with the exceptional Ayanna Witter-Johnson.
Hattie and Becca talked a little bit about the conception of the podcast and their own mental health journeys, and then chatted with Ayanna about her background and career in music. Ayanna talks brilliantly about the intricacies of making her own unique career despite not fitting into a...
Published 09/11/24
We're back with our first interview after the summer! The brilliant Laure Chan speaks with Hattie and Becca about her cross-cultural, genre-bending creative endeavours and her journey to musical authenticity.
How did Laure get into composing whilst already being an established violinist? How does she explore her own identity through the medium of music? How did her shoulder injury affect her outlook on making music?
Find out by listening to Things Musicians Don’t Talk About.
Follow Laure on...
Published 09/09/24
Trigger warning: eating disorders, weight (no specific numbers)
A different format of episode this week! Becca reads out her latest blog on her body, her identity and her fears about the possibility of a life of ‘sizing-up’.
She answers some questions afterwards about the blog, talking about the male gaze, the concept of numbers in recovery and the physicality of trumpet...
Published 09/05/24
Reflecting on recent trips back to our former music schools and colleges, we chat about the complex emotions that arise when revisiting places of past trauma. We discuss the challenges of addressing mental health in educational settings, wondering if our message is relevant to current students, and the lasting impact of architecture and locations on our wellbeing. We also explore the nuances of loneliness, and share our personal journeys of making peace with specific London locations.
Link...
Published 07/15/24
When cellist Ruth Philips was 29 and studying in America, she left her room as she wanted it to be found after her death. So certain was she that the performance approaching her would be the end of her life.
Now, Ruth is sought after for her whole, integrative approach as a cello teacher, mindfulness practitioner and performance coach. She speaks to us about her journey towards discovering mindfulness, reframing the word 'practice' and encouraging others to consider the violent language we...
Published 07/02/24
We thought we'd celebrate hitting 3,000 Instagram followers as some sort of milestone in this crazy journey to cultivate much-needed honesty in the music industry! Every follower, every listener we connect with feels like a little headway in making change in the culture.
In this episode, we take some time to look back on our podcast journey so far, reminiscing about how we became a duo and how TMDTA has grown over the past 4 years. Thanks to questions from our listeners, we also reflect on...
Published 04/26/24
In this episode of Things Musicians Don't Talk About, Becca sits down with Chloé van Soeterstède in her dressing room at the Royal College of Music. Chloé shares her personal experiences of working as a musician alongside pregnancy and then motherhood. She walks us through her journey - from figuring out with her manager when might be the best time to get pregnant, to performing while visibly pregnant and giving birth naturally with the aid of mental preparation. Chloé also opens up about...
Published 04/05/24
Another chatty episode for you lovely lot! This was recorded for our last Voices radio slot in February 2023. Hattie and Becca chat about queerness in classical music, exploring our opinions on the films Tár and Maestro, and how we feel power dynamics and hero-worship were portrayed in them. As we've seen over the past few decade or so, teacher-student relationships can be such a dangerous environment if those positions of authority are abused, and so we take a further look into what exactly...
Published 03/07/24
This week we come to you (unintentionally) from the Royal Opera House! We speak with composer, theatre-maker, and journalist Zygmund de Somogyi about growing up with Autism Spectrum Disorder, not fitting in to the classical music world, discovering the world of composing, their experiences of imposter syndrome and feeling disconnected from the world around them. Zyggy is now studying opera composition and discusses how they fell into opera and what it's like to work as an opera composer in...
Published 03/04/24
TW: sexual assault we do discuss an experience of sexual assault/harassment about halfway through the episode so feel free to skip through / give this one a miss 3
We recorded this episode as part of our Voices Radio residency after the hazy summer of 2023. We took a break from the podcast for a couple of months and reflect on our individual experiences of said break. But just because *we were on a break*, doesn't mean our little brains weren't pondering the music biz. What about critics...
Published 02/14/24
A very Happy New Year from us at TMDTA! To kick off 2024, we have an episode recorded waaaaay back last year with the joyous James Partridge. We speak to him about his very unique career, bringing 'primary school bangers' to the masses and what life is like as a social media sensation. Why do these primary school hymns unlock 100% FEELS in us and what does James think about music education? Find out here on Things Musicians Don't Talk About.
Follow James on:
Instagram:...
Published 01/02/24
On our Voices Radio slot this month, Becca interviewed DJ Jess Hands about her experiences with mental illness and how making music has been a healing distraction from her struggles. We hear her honest account of what it's like to go through mental health crises, bipolar disorder and to get to grips with simultaneously working as a DJ.
Jessica's bio:
"My name is Jessica Hands, DJ name Jess Hands, a lover for all things bass and wonky sounds. I have bi polar type 1 and BPD, I am here to share...
Published 11/21/23
Welcome back! This week we speak with astounding trumpet soloist, Simon Höfele, taking a peek behind the scenes of his stunning international career to discuss the reality of it all. We chat about Simon's fortunate journey to becoming a soloist and how his ultimate love is for creating music (especially the contemporary kind), using the trumpet as a tool to achieve that. Simon also works part-time as a very cool hipster barista which he describes almost like 'paid therapy' - a form of...
Published 11/05/23
Composer Gavin Higgins found that music was the only thing calmed his severe facial tics as a young kid. After an assessment at the Maudsley Hospital, Gavin was diagnosed with Tourettes and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. He was put on Prozac and told to snap a rubber band on his wrist to take away his intrusive thoughts.
A lot has changed in the treatment of mental illnesses, but what's the reality behind living with two severe conditions as an award-winning composer? And why is Gavin so...
Published 10/19/23
It's our first sneaky peaky Patreon preview! Welcome through this little creaky door in the paywall to hear 5 minutes of exclusive content that we recorded last Halloween!
In this episode, Hattie, Katy and Becca scare the living daylights outta themselves by reading feedback ranging from grade 8 to graduate scheme rejections. We also have a little rant about assessing music as a subjective art form, and Hattie shares a story with us that we had to bleep out because it was too gross.
If you...
Published 10/02/23
This episode is dedicated to Koshka’s wonderful piano teacher, Niel Immelman, who sadly passed away since it was recorded - and who made it all possible.
TW// sexual violence and assault, physical assault, police brutality
Becca first came across today's guest when she stumbled upon her collection of essays, Abolishing the Police. Philosophy professor, Koshka Duff (University of Nottingham), was largely inspired to compile this collection of essays on policing, dissent and abolition after her...
Published 09/22/23
For TMDTA's July Voices Radio appearance, Hattie and Becca discuss Lewis Capaldi's Glastonbury set and how this might translate in the classical music world. They also chat about their experiences of saying no as employees and as freelancers, Hattie's new adventures on bass guitar and Becca's new therapist. In the original show, the first half of Paul Denegri's episode played after their discussion, but now you can go and listen to the whole thing wherever you're listening to this...
Published 09/13/23
Our amazing friend, trumpeter Aaron Akugbo, is about to make his BBC Proms debut with the Chineke! Orchestra - but there's more to his story. Determined to be unapologetic about his identity, Aaron takes us through the weird world of brass 'lad' culture, through to the rise of Black Lives Matter and navigating the brass world as someone facing direct and indirect discrimination for being both black and gay.
Discover Aaron on Instagram
His website is...
Published 08/31/23
Becca catches up with her former teacher, Paul Denegri, from his stay in an old farmhouse. The humblest of the humble, Paul takes us through his journey to where he is now: revisiting his unexpected appointment as Head of Brass at Wells Cathedral School; his feelings of imposter syndrome and disillusionment with the freelance musician lifestyle; and staying true to his identity. Paul's trademark openness and warmth is so refreshing in the world of classical music and music education, where...
Published 07/11/23
Things Musicians Don't Talk About is now generously supported by the Royal Society of Musicians!
The Royal Society of Musicians is Britain’s oldest music charity and our aims remain as relevant today as they were in the earliest years – to provide vital financial assistance, advice and guidance to those professionally active in the world of music but who are unable to work due to accident, illness, stress or anxiety. Being a charity run by musicians for musicians, we are uniquely placed to...
Published 07/02/23