Episodes
In this episode, host Julie Menanno delves into the evolving dynamics of Melissa and Drew's marriage as they navigate the life-altering effects of parenthood. After 12 therapy sessions, the couple has made strides in breaking free from negative communication patterns, but challenges still arise around their differing needs for social time. Melissa, a stay-at-home mom, opens up about the insecurities and frustrations that come with her role, feeling like her personal sacrifices go unnoticed...
Published 10/02/24
In this episode of The Secure Love Podcast, Drew confronts his deep-seated feelings of shame, tracing their roots back to childhood experiences, including a pivotal moment at a baseball game when his father left him. This incident instilled a belief of inadequacy that resurfaces in his present-day struggles, particularly regarding anxiety about new work conditions. Drew expresses fears of needing to "reprove" himself, which amplifies his feelings of failure and shame. Under Julie's guidance,...
Published 09/24/24
In this episode of The Secure Love Podcast, host and couples therapist Julie Menanno focuses on Melissa, the anxious partner in her relationship with Drew. Melissa feels an overwhelming sense of "getting it wrong" in her interactions with him. As Melissa navigates these vulnerable feelings, Julie guides her out of intellectualizing emotions and into truly experiencing them. Through the session, Julie points out how Melissa's tendency to process feelings in her head can act as a defense...
Published 09/12/24
In this episode, Drew and Melissa share the challenges they faced during a 10-hour road trip to a family beach vacation with their three kids. Surrounded by 30 family members, they found themselves under constant scrutiny. While trying to ensure their kids had a good time, they also struggled with unsolicited comments that made them question their parenting skills.   Melissa felt the sting of disconnection when Drew chose to escape the stressful situation by spending time with less...
Published 09/04/24
In this episode, Drew, the avoidant partner in his relationship with Melissa, begins to confront his deep-seated feelings of inadequacy and shame. Drew's inner critic, which has driven him to seek perfection and self-improvement, also caused emotional pain and isolation. As he starts to unravel these complex feelings, he struggles to articulate them but makes significant progress in acknowledging their impact on his life and relationship. Julie’s guidance helps Drew understand that these...
Published 08/21/24
In this week’s episode of the Secure Love Podcast, Melissa and Drew face the ongoing challenge of truly understanding each other’s emotional states. Although the couple has acknowledged they've made tremendous progress, they still have their moments of disconnect. While Drew claims he’s happy, Melissa senses something off in his body language and expressions, stirring doubts rooted in past misunderstandings. Ever felt like you and your partner were just not on the same page despite...
Published 08/13/24
In this week's episode of the Secure Love Podcast, Melissa and Drew recount a transformative moment from their Fourth of July weekend. Picture this: amidst the typical holiday stress, a disagreement escalates in front of their kids. Instead of spiraling further, they pause and ask each other, "Hey, can we try this again?" It's a simple question, but one that marks a significant milestone in their journey.  This episode not only celebrates Melissa and Drew's progress but also takes a deeper...
Published 08/06/24
This week's episode of The Secure Love Podcast opens with Drew reflecting on the early years of their marriage. His reflection leads to a heartfelt apology to Melissa for not showing up the way she needed, eliciting both an emotional reaction and a tremendous sense of relief for her. This moment of understanding and Drew's willingness to own his part in their past disconnect highlights his growth, yet Julie points out that this is still within the bounds of their 'negative cycle'. Drew's...
Published 07/30/24
In today's episode of the Secure Love Podcast, we dive into Part 1 of a compelling two-part series exploring deep-rooted challenges in Melissa and Drew's relationship. Reflecting on last week's chaos when Drew returned to a patio strewn with toys, Melissa revisits her feelings of frustration. She was ready to support Drew, but his withdrawn demeanor left her feeling helpless and disconnected. This moment of disconnect isn't isolated—it harks back to a critical time in their relationship when...
Published 07/24/24
In this week's episode of the Secure Love Podcast, Melissa and Drew dive into a common household challenge that many parents face: the chaos that greets them at the end of a long workday. Drew comes home from a demanding day at work, only to find his kids throwing toys across the patio and being a bit more rowdy than he anticipated. In these situations, Drew wishes he could ease into his evening, but is frustrated by the commotion, leading him to irritation and a tendency to shut down. ...
Published 07/16/24
This week on the Secure Love Podcast, Melissa and Drew share their breakthroughs and real-life applications of their therapy work with Julie Menanno. They've been learning to identify and break their negative cycles, but as always, the journey is full of ups and downs. Imagine this: one of their twin boys slams his brother's hand in the door, leading to a frantic trip to the hospital. While Drew is at a work event, Melissa is left to handle the chaos alone. When she reaches out to Drew for...
Published 07/09/24
In this episode of the Secure Love Podcast, Melissa and Drew find themselves caught in a familiar struggle at a baseball game with their kids. Drew checks out, feeling overwhelmed, leaving Melissa to handle the kids alone. Sound familiar? Julie helps the couple dive into the heart of their issues. Melissa opens up about the crushing weight of feeling like a failure and the panic of being left to manage everything alone, even when Drew is right there. Meanwhile, Drew's avoidant behavior,...
Published 07/03/24
In the first episode of The Secure Love Podcast, we meet Melissa and Drew, a couple navigating the complexities of their relationship. Melissa opens up about her experience of anger and shutdown when she feels disconnected from Drew during stressful times. As she describes her attempts to avoid confrontation and the eventual buildup of frustration, Drew shares his own sense of helplessness and shutdown in response to her anger. Join us as Melissa and Drew delve into the vulnerable place of...
Published 06/24/24
Welcome to The Secure Love Podcast: Real Time Couples Therapy with Julie Menanno. Join licensed therapist Julie Menanno as she uses Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) to help Melissa and Drew, a couple in their 30s, navigate life's challenges and improve their relationship. Discover the impact of attachment theory, identify negative cycles, and learn practical skills for creating lasting positive change. Tune in for relatable insights and actionable steps to build a secure, fulfilling...
Published 06/20/24