"The more you start to learn about what you are, which is absolutely completely interdependent and just a fractal of what everyone else is,  the more it starts to break down. I can't hate myself. It just doesn't make sense.” - Sara Campbell   Following up on our retreat theme of compassion and the five skandas, Sara gives us a raw and revealing look at self compassion. Plus, she gives us the naked truth of what it was like to be Zen Center caretaker over the summer. What techniques and...

“We don't downplay it. We don't sit here and say, ‘what I'm feeling isn't real and doesn't matter.’ It's this weird technique where it's like, no, no, go all in on it and take it very, very seriously with an enormous grain of salt.” - Dave Cuomo     Dave gives a pep talk for the deep practice of retreat (and in general) while introducing our theme for the season - the Compassion Monster, aka a Carnage of Compassion, aka the truth that everything you do, in all of your inglorious incarnations,...

“If Zen's teaching me that I have inherent value just for existing, part of that whole deal is that I'm going to be doing mantras or some other wacky sh*t that I come across in six months. And I'm okay with that.” - Sara Campbell   After finding benefits in affirmative mantra practices, Sara looks back on Zen emptiness teachings to find out if there really is a contradiction between self empowerment and the enlightenment of letting go of that self entirely. What’s the difference between...

“You see the problems with the system, problems with teachers, and problems with yourself and realize, none of us can quite live up to what we're teaching here. But if I want do something actually good in the world, I can't think of anything more beneficial than providing a quiet empty room where everyone can do whatever they need to do to find some peace.“ - Dave Cuomo   Dave looks at morality in part two of his series on the paramitas, and tries to figure out what makes a good person and if...

“Zen isn't there to sugarcoat things and cuddle you. We're not talking about being mean, we're talking about, how do we slap someone's face in the most compassionate way? (…metaphorically of course)” - Gyokei Yokoyama   Gyokei talks us through the spirit (and specifics) of… ‘Dhaaarmaaa Commbaaat!’ from the lion’s roar, to the three foot long venomous viper of truth, to how to wield the swift and silent sword of compassion ourselves. Can we learn to intuitively be what the moment needs without...

“The benefit of you existing is you get to figure out what that means for yourself. And then you can come back and teach the rest of us about that. That is a generosity.” - Dave Cuomo   Dave gifts us with a deep dive into generosity in the first on a new series on the paramitas, aka the six perfections, aka the six things that all good Buddhas have gotten really really good at to get them where they are. What is the spirit of giving in Buddhism? How can we do our part to keep the great river...

“Joy is not a failing. It’s not irresponsible. It’s not deluded. True joy is the birthright of every being. It's a normal thing.” - Curtis Fabens   Founding ACZC resident Curtis gives us an impassioned exhortation to the recipe for a life well lived - clarity, purpose, & joy. Is clarity really the path of least resistance and if so, why is it so often hard to see? Is it possible to not have purpose? Is there a fool proof trick to always hitting the payout on the slot machine of joy in...

“You burn the whole forest once. And what comes back is the same forest - the same aspiration, the same desires, the same dreams… But there's this indescribable difference. And that's what makes all the difference.” - Gyokei Yokoyama   Gyokei discusses alignment, blockages, and the prickliness that comes from trying to put our own ideals on a world that might already have a few ideas of its own. Can we unblock ourselves from the limits of our own best intentions? Can we find a well adjusted...

“We don't need you to regurgitate our answers. We need you to go figure out who the hell you are. That's your contribution.” - Dave Cuomo   Dave shares a favorite legend about a cocky young monk crossing a river and a moment of self confidence so powerful we’re still talking about it a thousand years later. In a practice that glorifies not knowing, how do we know when we know something for certain? What is self confidence in a tradition so obsessed with no-self? Can we look up to our teachers...

“She asked, ‘How are you?’ And I said, ‘…good.’ But it was like nothing, like plain rice, like oatmeal without sugar and you forgot to even put the dash of salt - like original flavor.” - Jitsujo Gauthier   Jitsujo, University of the West Buddhist Chaplaincy department Chair, resident priest and preceptor at Zen Center of Los Angeles, and long time friend of the sangha, generously joins us for a raw and revealing talk about rage, compassion, wisdom, the limitations of each of those grand...

“I never feel freer then when I realize I'm the schmuck I've been trying not to be this whole time. If I'm the a*****e, I can't judge anybody else. And then I'm free of all of us.” - Dave Cuomo   Dave returns with another practical probe into Buddhist basics - this week, the Five Skandhas, aka Buddha’s classic formulation of what makes us us and reality (seem) real that might even offer us a little bit of free will and agency in said reality (free will not guaranteed). Is holding onto blame...

“Zazen is always kind of great, even when it's awful. When I don't understand what I'm doing, I can always sit Zazen.” - Ish Lipman   Long time sangha friend Ish brings us the story of what he’s doing and why he’s here while we just maybe learn something about those things for ourselves. From atheist upbringings as a skater kid in the city to becoming an artist and embracing the meaningful meaninglessness of Zen, Ish relatably reminds us how to keep faith in not being sure what’s left to...

“What was really liberating for me was finding out who I am when leaving or getting kicked out aren’t an option for anyone. When not I’m worried about my own survival or earning my place in the community, when you can't fire or cancel people or really even get away from them…. It was like, oh hey, we're actually family now.” - Dave Cuomo   Dave gets down to brass tacks basics with a deep dive into the Triple Treasures, aka the Three Returns, aka Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha. Can we get meaning...

“Really question what you perceive or know and don’t draw many conclusions from it. Also don't think you know nothing. You do know something, and if you abandon what you know to be true you've missed it altogether.” - Sara Campbell   Sara sends us a dispatch from her post Zen Center exploits and dabbles in some serious storytelling with The Original Adventures of Herman the Worm Boy (as delightful as they sound) and the never ending quest for the One Mind with our old friend Huangbo. How do...

“If you don't have the perception of a self, you’re probably not going to get angry. But… we can discuss whether maybe sometimes it's okay to get angry if someone chops off your arms and legs…” - Jason Dodge   In a flash, Subhuti understands everything, and in a flash Buddha pulls the rug out from him (and us!) and frees him from his own enlightenment. Join us as Jason bravely (and expertly) takes us into an epic chapter of the Diamond Sutra where we learn what exactly holds us back, how to...

“Learning to love the a-hole is the way you fix the problem, not getting rid of the a-hole.” - Dave Cuomo   Dave takes a practical look at desire and how to work with it in real world terms, while also trying to figure out why people started treating monks as ceremonial objects, whether or not they warranted it, and why group chanting is such great fun. Can you trust someone who doesn’t want anything from you? What do we do when the biggest enemy we face is ourselves? What is the fool proof...

“If we do not have stress, we will not be healthy enough to survive. We have to be in this. We have to be with our enemies. Even enemies make us healthy.” - Shumyo Kojima   Special guest Reverend Shumyo Kojima, Abbot of Zenshuji Temple (North America’s oldest Zen temple (100 years and counting!)) joins us for a talk about learning to love your stress and enjoy your enemies, with colorful stories (metaphors maybe?) of catfish, eels, outhouses, and bringing the stinky and sacred together in the...

“Conditions can be perfectly aligned for you to do the right thing, but you have to meet that with a strength of will that comes from failing over, and over, and over again. And that's not easy.” - Henry Zander   Tasked with helming ACZC for the summer practice period, Henry boards a train and heads west for his date with destiny. Does Zen center life actually bestow us with its promised perfections? Is it possible to waste time when time is already everything? How can we uphold the great...

“The world of Zen is so full of sh*t, something beautiful is bound to bloom.” - Anonymous   Our long wandering resident priest returns from his stint in Japan with tales of monkly mayhem in the monastery. Did they really beat the self out of him, or just grind it deeper? Is traditional monastic training a test of enlightenment or merely endurance? Is there a method to this madness or has it all just been one continuous mistake lost in translation?? Find out here.

“I’ve definitely angrily swept the floor, definitely not been stoked. But I think the constraints are good for you, like in the way that creative constraints can be really helpful. On some level its a privilege and an honor to have a community relying on you. And on some level its like goddamn it, they’ve got me.” - Sara Campbell   Sara bids farewell to her tenure as an ACZC resident and seasonal caretaker some reflections on her years as a live-in zennie and a reading from Norman Fischer on...

“Capitalism does suck, but you shouldn’t let that make you a bad worker” - Helena Harvilicz   Helena tells stories of Zen, parenting, multitasking, and a history of being half assed at work until a job came along where failure was no longer an option. Along the way we get choice selections from Dogen about the Three Minds of a good cook. Does our work need purpose to be worthwhile? And what is that supposed to look like? Did these celibate monks have any wisdom for the busy parents among us?...

“Never think you’re better than the show. It’s not pleasant to work with, and it doesn’t make the work any easier.” - Emily Eslami   Emily gets brass tacks practical with a walk through Dogen’s best advice for all the working stiffs out there on not only how to get through your work day, but maybe even finding the joyful, nurturing, magnanimous mind of everything by building temples from ordinary greens and working like your head is on fire. Why are bad days and bad bosses the best...

“I came to this because I'm a disillusioned person, and they said that's okay. That's the point. But now they’re saying that there is something that doesn’t die, something that stays. And they’re teaching it through their own skepticism and doubt. And that is something I trust.” - Dave Cuomo   Dave dives back in to Dogen’s enigmatic Mountains and Rivers Sutra while looking at what  America might be looking for in a rational religion, and whether or not Zen could fit the bill. What is the half...

“When I found out that we're in the degenerate dharma ending age where nobody can get enlightened, I thought, ‘That sucks. Why am I even doing this then?’ And then I decided that's a great place to practice. If we don’t have to worry about getting anywhere with it, we can just sit.” - Jason Dodge   Jason skillfully navigates us through the perfect paradoxes of the Diamond Sutra, and we all get a little nerdy on some fascinating (if a little odd) Buddhist Cosmology. What exactly are the 32...

“It's brave of them to let people just step in and screw up. But it's not about how well you do, or whether you want to do it - we have a task and each person embodies it. If we’re getting anything here, it’s that authenticity.” - Gyokei Yokoyama   They say you don’t choose your family, and in Zen we don’t pick our sanghas. Gyokei discusses what it means to practice with a sangha, why it can be the trickiest and most rewarding of the big three jewels (Buddha, Dharma, & Sangha), and the...