Conflict is a normal, natural part of every healthy relationship, but sometimes our children can become fearful and anxious when parents argue. You can have more productive arguments and model healthy conflict resolution by focusing on the quality of the interaction—the regulation—rather than the resolution itself.  Brittany asks, "How do you teach empathy without creating a people-pleaser?" We want our children to be helpful, kind, and considerate of others, but not at the expense of their own wellbeing or with unhealthy levels of self-sacrifice. There are three things you can teach your child to prevent them from becoming people-pleasers. In this episode: When children become concerned and try to keep the peace between parents Be attentive to your child's worries Is it ever ok to argue in front of the kids? Examples of unhealthy conflict Respectful, productive conflict How to focus on regulation over resolution (4 things to model) John Gottman, Esther Perez People-pleasing VS empathy, consideration of others Where does your child get their value or sense of identity from? . Related links:  #523 Should We Argue In Front Of The Kids? . Find us on Facebook or TikTok Subscribe to the Happy Families newsletter Leave a voice memo here or email your questions/comments to [email protected] Find out more about joining THE QUEST at our website See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.