Chairman!
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“As he drove across the Pennines Steve Barnes adjusted the climate control in his Ford Fiesta. Whilst it lacked the air conditioning, heated seats or individual temperature control of his previous jaguars, Mercedes and Renault Meganes, he found winding the window down a suitable alternative. Another Monday game he thought, didn’t Sky TV know his best football memories all revolved around (Sheffield) Wednesdays! He chuckled, “I’ll use that in my interview tonight”
One benefit of his new car however was the built in I-tunes feature which allowed him to while away the long drives listening to his favourite podcasts. He tuned into his number one choice, Quickly Kevin. In his mind’s eye he liked to picture Chris leaving a nightclub with two blonde beauties on his arms. On his left would be Josh, and on his right Michael wearing a Pamela Anderson wig. “What a jammy bugger” he thought.
Their chat meandered along in much the same way as the new Leddersford bypass, sweeping through 90s football just as the road pierced the moors, dipping into the postbag like the valleys of Brideford, before peaking at the interview as he hit the brow of the hill near his favourite watering hole “The Feathers”. He smiled as the lads wondered about the most exotic locations their podcast was listened to. He half pondered writing in himself, telling them about the time he listened to the podcast on the beaches of Rio as he gazed up at Christ the Redeemer. “No Steve, nobody would believe that story!”
Their witty repartee and friendly banter reminded him a lot of the good times of his youth, with Gary “his pal” Lister and Jimmy, the great Mulcaster United number one Brian Frob’s son. Just as he started to remember his old stories, his reverie was broken by the Bluetooth phone speaker. It was his assistant Julie. Reaching to answer the phone he decided instead to wait a couple of rings before answering, enjoying the frisson of excitement that came with waiting to hear her voice.
“Mr Barnes” she said
“That’s Steve to you Julie”. He laughed inwardly at his own joke
“Steve”, she replied, he liked to think coquettishly. “It’s Sir Lawrence Brook, he’s been rushed to hospital”. Steve felt the sweep of dread, not his chairman, the man who had invested so much into the town, who had literally put Leddersford on the map, what possible fate could have befallen him, “somebody has poisoned his cucumber sandwich”
He swerved off the road like an Arsenal full back hearing he had only been offered £55.000 a week. Not Sir Lawrence, a man without enemies (apart from Mossad, Serbian war lords and a disgruntled English teacher), who would do such a thing!
Only one man was worthy of this investigation he seethed, “not the Chief-Constable or his able deputies, no, Mr. Steve Barnes himself.””
Matthew EFC via Apple Podcasts ·
Great Britain ·
12/11/19
More reviews of Quickly Kevin; will he score? The 90s Football Show
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“Loved it. Chris if you could bag King Eric my life would be complete. Failing that, Jesper Blomqvist”
Ricmarc11 via Apple Podcasts ·
Great Britain ·
03/12/17
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“The interviews with Merson and Le Tissier are brilliant. Great stories from two great talents. Looking forward to the new weekly output.”
Funster via Apple Podcasts ·
Great Britain ·
03/20/17
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“A sublime piece of broadcasting; delivering a nostalgic return to arguably THE golden period in footballing history”
Robbie Earle via Apple Podcasts ·
Great Britain ·
02/24/17
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