Mrs Scully and Papa Scully and Sister Scully are all here this week because DANA HATH BEEN RETURNED! Mulder spends the entire episode sprinting and screaming in search of the truth, Nurse Owens is actually perhaps AN ANGEL, Cigarette Smoking Man gets an actual cigarette slapped out of his actual...

VAMPIRES?! Scully is gone ONE WEEK and we have VAMPIRES!?!?! With veterinary needles!??! Join us as we discuss how normal the name Kristen is when spelled with an "E," our outrage at John The Son's inability to wipe his mouth off after feeding or clean under his fingernails, the proper way of...

THE X-FILES ARE RE-OPENED, SMUG BITCHES! Daddy Skinner said let's goooooooo!! Also: Scully is somewhere in the sky, Mulder's hair has one fleeting non-duckling moment while drenched in rain, and Duane Barry answers the question on all of our minds — "Who took Scully?" — very clearly:...