We all want partners who love and respect us. But does that also mean that they should obey us? In this week's episode, I talk about love and respect vs. obedience and why it's so easy to confuse the two. Even though obedience feels good, it does not have a place in a healthy, adult relationship. Life would be a lot easier if everyone just obeyed us all the time, but that's not how it works. And we need to learn to be okay with that. Work with...

Expecting ourselves to be on top physically and mentally 24/7 is entirely unreasonable. Being an Elite Girlfriend is not  about being super-human and never struggling with anything. In this week's episode, I share what it means to show up as an Elite Girlfriend even when life gets you down. Whether it's hunger, stress, lack of sleep, grief, PMS, or any other issues you might be struggling with.   Work with...

Is there a superior way of living your life regarding being calm and collected vs. emotional and explosive? Is one better than the other or can you just pick and choose which fits you? In this week's episode, we explore the possible pros and cons of the two and I explain how I personally decided what was right for me. Work with me: https://www.katrinberndt.com/ Contact: https://www.katrinberndt.com/ https://www.instagram.com/elitegirlfriendpodcast

Your partner is not a problem to be fixed. They are not your child, your project, or your responsibility. And 9 times out of 10, we stay out of your partner's brain because you have no power there anyway. But in this week's episode, we do dive into your partner's brain. We explore how it works and how it might show up in your relationship. Understanding how their brain works can be a very powerful way for you to stop judging and show some more compassion for the person you love. PS. I just...

"I'm obviously triggered right now and all I want to do is ___... I know I shouldn't, but doing ___ is also reasonable in this situation! HELP!" Sound familiar? If you have ever struggled to decide whether or not to act on something because it's both unhealthy AND reasonable, this episode is for you. I give you my rule of thumb for situations like this and give you a peek into the next step once you master the first one. Remember! Not acting on reasonable behavior is not a forever kind of...

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you are clearly triggered, you feel awful, you can feel the urgency inside of you to act, and you know exactly what you want to do to punish your partner in that moment? If so, this is the episode for you. I will walk you through three powerful questions to ask yourself in that moment that will help you slow down, pause, and regain access to your "intelligent" brain. Work with...

One of my most important coaching tools when working with my clients is to never trust that we have the same definitions of what things mean. Good communication, healthy boundaries, love, empathy... what do all these things really mean? How we define our own positive (and negative) traits really matters and it's important to not mislabel your unhealthy, disempowering behaviors. Listen to today's episode to learn more about 5 common traits that are often mislabeled as "positive" but are...

Fake it till you make it is nothing new. But it has always puzzled me when it comes to becoming a new and improved version of yourself. On the one hand, it doesn't help at all. On the other hand, it's one of the biggest keys in any transformation journey. Tune in to this week's episode to learn the do's and don'ts of faking it and what makes the difference between eventually making it and just continuing your downward spiral. Work with...

Ladies!! I have not forgotten about you. I promise. The season of change I've been in for a long time now is culminating and I'm making a lot of big decisions in my life and business. Listen to this episode to find out all about my new plan and then check out my brand new (tiny) Instagram account here: https://www.instagram.com/elitegirlfriendcoaching/

"I just want to feel better." Sound familiar? Then you're a lot like my clients who struggle to dream big and go after their fullest potential. In this week's episode, I talk about the benefits of setting big goals, aiming high, and deciding to transform your life completely rather than just tweaking what you've already got. That growth experience and the process of becoming you 2.0 is too good to miss out on just because your brain is a little worried about the effort required. Let's...

I'm not taking any prisoners in this week's episode. It's time we have a serious conversation about "What if I'm right to be anxious and jealous?" I have a very firm belief about this thought and looking back at your past self, with 20/20 hindsight. I decided very early on in my journey that I would never think this specific thought, and in this week's episode, I'll share why. Work with...

Your thoughts create your feelings and your feelings drive your actions. So if you want to change, you need to change your thoughts. Simple enough, right? Well... wrong. It CAN be that simple in very rare cases, but most of the time it requires a lot of hard work. And that's the hard work we are going to talk about in this week's episode. No more "half-assing" it and then complaining that it doesn't work, okay? Work with...

Social media is full of s****y relationship advice that usually just perpetuates the anxiety, jealousy, insecurity, and confusion that grumpy girlfriends struggle with. The advice we talk about in this episode is not objectively good or bad, but from the perspective of being a grumpy girlfriend, it does little to help.    In this week's episode, I debunk some common, s****y relationship advice and expectations that fuel your grumpiness. Work with...

Are the certain topics in your relationship that just keep causing you pain? Frustration? Anxiety? All you want is for reality to be different than it is... because YOU ARE RIGHT. Your thought is true. And reality is just not playing along. In this week's episode, we talk about hugging the cactus. Something all humans do in their lives. But our capacity to let go of the cactus and take a step back will directly determine how much pain and frustration we live with on a daily basis. How to...

This is a guided coaching episode that I recommend you listen to if you have been triggered by something in your relationship. The goal of processing a trigger like this is to flush the fight or flight response out of your system so you can access your intelligent brain again. We don't want to trust and act on our perception of reality when our emotions are heightened and our nervous system is entirely shot. Always acting on your triggers and urges is not healthy for any relationship. How...

Have you ever thought that your partner is the problem in your relationship? That their behavior is the problem that needs to be solved? Then this is the episode for you. We are never more disempowered than when we give someone or something else in our lives credit for being the "problem"... because that also makes them the solution. In this week's episode, I share what needs to happen in order for you to be able to solve the problem in YOUR life! How to Stop Being...

Do you ever feel obsessed with your partner? Does it feel good... or not so much? Could it even become unhealthy if it goes on for too long? A while back I got a question from a girlfriend who struggled to differentiate between her feelings of love and what felt like an unhealthy obsession. So let's figure it out together! In this week's episode, I am joined by Daniel Penner Cline and Ron Cecil from the Cutting for Sign podcast. We discuss obsession in relationships and in true Grumpy...

You've heard of people pleasing... saying yes to things you don't want to say yes to in order to manipulate people's thoughts and feelings about you. But what about retrospective people pleasing? In this week's episode, I dive into one of the biggest grumpy girlfriend red flags that I see when working with my clients. The "after all I've done for you" entitlement that shows up after reality doesn't turn out the way you thought it would (or should). How to Stop Being...

No one has missed the importance of setting boundaries in life in order to stay safe and sound. But for a lot of grumpy girlfriends, this is an area of confusion, frustration, and trouble. Is it possible to set too many boundaries? Tune in to this week's episode to learn about what boundaries are, the most common boundary struggles for grumpy girlfriends, and how to make sure you're not giving your partner responsibility for managing your emotional life. Other episodes to check out: 26. For...

Is your brain constantly looking for signs that your relationship is about to end? Are you on high alert for signs your partner is cheating on you? No matter what your partner does, do you always interpret their actions in the worst possible way? Then this episode is for you. How to Stop Being Grumpy: https://www.katrinberndt.com/video-series Contact: https://www.katrinberndt.com/contact https://www.instagram.com/katrinberndt

Spinning in indecision is the best way to waste time in your life and relationship. Yet we spin in indecision and struggle to make decisions because we are so afraid of making the wrong choice and wasting time. Ironic, huh? If you are struggling to make a decision in your relationship right now, try creating a decision container and go all in on any decision within a set period of time. This will help you actually get the ball rolling and start seeing some results. 3-Part Video Series You...

Who we are, what we struggle with, and how we feel depends on the thoughts we think. So the only thing standing in between you and the girlfriend you want to be are the thoughts you repeatedly think and believe. Here are 23 thoughts for you to practice believing and finding evidence for in order to make this year your least grumpy year yet! Let's go! 3-Part Video Series You HAVE TO...

What is it really like to be the partner of a grumpy girlfriend? Pure misery? Or not so bad? Well, if you ask my boyfriend, it was a walk in the park. 'Cause he had no idea I was being grumpy, to begin with. To celebrate episode 100, I invited my boyfriend Sonny to join me and answer your most burning questions about his grumpy girlfriend-boyfriend experience. Enjoy! 3-Part Video Series You HAVE TO...

A few years ago I was diagnosed with GAD, Generalized Anxiety Disorder. So I've struggled with anxiety a lot as an adult. But... today, I don't struggle with anxiety anymore. I don't struggle with overthinking. In today's episode, I share with you the thought exercise or the tool that I used to manage my overthinking and eventually overcome my intense anxiety. WWNPD? 3-Part Video Series You HAVE TO...