2021 was the worst year of Allie’s life: she was fired from her stupid waitressing job, dumped by a guy she was pity-f*cking, and evicted from her apartment. This is NOT how she thought life would look at 26. On New Year’s Eve, Allie heads to a party where she plans to get plastered and leave this mess of a year behind. 2022 is going to be her year, she can just feel it! Spoiler: it’s definitely not going to be her year. But this party is still important: Gabe — Allie’s best friend and our narrator — tells us that by the end of the month she will f*ck, marry, and kill three different...
For their two-month anniversary, Allie and Gabe are headed to court! Queen’s Court, that is, hosted by Trixie Mattel, one of Gabe’s favorite daytime court TV shows. Obviously, they’re going to settle their marital troubles in the most dramatic way possible. Things are once again looking up for...
Published 04/05/22
With the police on to them and no money to escape, Allie and Gabe head to the bar to, uh, brainstorm. In their drunken haze, they actually manage to come up with a plan that might just save them from prison… but can they pull it off? Can Gabe flirt his way through a police interrogation? Will...
Published 03/29/22