An interesting conversation occurred on our Facebook group (facebook.com/brilliantlivinghq) this week. We’d posted something about ‘Why people don’t like goals (and are they right?)’ and one of our Facebook members made the comment: “Setting goals chaps my behind.” The Anglo-Saxon aside, what a great comment from someone who is obviously not a total convert of goal-setting. Direct and to the point. And that got us thinking. As Kathryn is the writer of the international best-seller...

“You can prepare yourself for success, you can step into the feeling of actually having achieved the goal, see what it feels like, tweak it a little bit and see if it really is the goal that you’re after.” ~ Richard Scott Today’s guest on the Changeability Podcast is Brisbane based, Richard Scott at mynd.works.  We asked him onto the show for his valuable insights on the subject of goals, goal-setting and making your goals a reality. Richard’s work combines Psychology, NLP and CBT with...

“The new year stands before us, like a chapter in a book, waiting to be written. We can help write that story by setting goals.” ~ Melody Beattie Welcome to the first post and podcast episode of 2016. If you're reading this in real time - a very Happy New Year to you. In our last episode (73) we asked ‘What are you proud of today?’ We talked about things we were pleased about, and how all too often we focus on what's going wrong or the things we don't like about ourselves. It doesn’t...

“We see the world, not as it is, but as we are – or, as we are conditioned to see it.” Stephen R. Covey The impetus for this week’s blog post and podcast was in part inspired by a conversation between the two of us. We’d been to see a couple of films and Julian was feeling a little stupid that he hadn’t really fully got to grips with their plots. During a conversation he said ‘You know, at the heart of it – I think I’m not very bright.’ Of course, as soon as he said it he realised it was a...

I just don’t have the time If you find yourself complaining you don’t have time to do what want because you’re too busy, here’s 12 suggestions of how to free up your time and energy. They come from our guest on episode 72 of the Changeability Podcast, Rob Cubbon, who shares interesting insights into the drains on our time and energy that sap us of the will to achieve what we want in life. If you recognise the name it’s because we talked with best-selling author Rob Cubbon in episode 58 about...

“When you are not attached to praise or criticism an interesting freedom is yours.” Kute Blackson We all find ourselves subject to criticism - not least from ourselves, but also from others. And we don’t like it. It makes us feel horrible - hurt, rejected, guilty, fearful, let down, misunderstood, angry, humiliated, insecure, embarrassed or unappreciated. What you can do about it? You can’t always prevent it or stop it - but you can handle it, by changing the way you feel about criticism...

“Criticism is something you can easily avoid by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.” ~Aristotle If you don’t want to be criticised - don’t do anything .Although you’ll probably then be criticised for not doing anything, or for doing nothing - if that’s actually possible. The meaning behind it is clear - the more you do the more people have to criticise you about. the more you open yourself up to judgement. We’ve all met people who always seem to be worried about what other...

‘A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone's feelings unintentionally’   Oscar Wilde We are emotional beings with feelings, and together with our thoughts (which are intricately linked to our emotions and feelings) is what make us us. But our own feelings don’t exist in isolation. We are after all social beings and exist in groups, communities, nations, continents and the world. Our feelings and behaviour affect other people’s feelings and behaviour and other people’s affect us - in a...

“Don’t allow your mind to tell your heart what to do. The mind gives up easily.” - Paulo Coelho For many of us, our behaviours are often influenced by our childhood and underpinning those behaviours can often be a feeling of needing to be loved.  The manifestation of that particular ‘feeling’ may well take the form of always striving to achieve – and by being in perpetual ‘doing’ mode - continually trying to prove yourself worthy through what you do. Something I’m sure many of us can...

“Feelings, nothing more than feelings” – Morris Albert It’s been a week where I’ve had to deal with “nothing more than feelings” in a very public way, speaking as I have at my father’s funeral. An event of this magnitude can bring up many feelings and I think it would be fair to say I’ve experienced the whole spectrum - feelings of sadness and grief but also gratitude and joy as we celebrated as well as mourned Dad’s life. “And feelings like I’ll never have you again in my life.” Morris...

“I pay no attention whatever to anybody's praise or blame. I simply follow my own feelings.” Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart Having recently talked about the ups and downs of life and a week when we experienced what might be called extremes of feeling, this week we put feelings in the spotlight. How are you feeling right at this very moment as you read this? We all have feelings, they’re an intrinsic part of our human experience, but what are they and what purpose do they serve? What is a...

“I really want to help people to be the best expression of who they’re made to be. And often I think we need people to call that out of us” ― Luke Strickland Our guest this week is Luke Strickland of The Potting Shed Podcast who joined us in the studio to help us with exploring creativity. About Luke Strickland Writer, thinker and dreamer Luke Strickland, is the host of the The Potting Shed Podcast, an eclectic exploration of a variety of topics helping you to be the person you’re created...

“Life has its ups and downs. When you are up, enjoy the scenery. When you are down, touch the soul of your being and feel the beauty.” ― Debasish Mridha This week we’re talking about the ups and downs of life and how we react and deal or cope with them. True to say partly spurred on by the week we’ve just had. It’s included the normal ups and downs of everyday life but on top of that there’s been some heightened ups and downs. In today’s episode (64) of the Changeability Podcast we share a...

If you ever wondered how to start and finish anything in life, then you can’t help but be inspired by Tom Boother’s story. “Become the thing, complete the challenge!” Tom Boother Tom Boother studied politics at the University of Leicester. And on graduating he did what all graduates do and sought to become a racing driver. Unfortunately, however, racing driving did not seek him and he was unsuccessful in securing the necessary funds to race at the level he wanted. So he returned to...

Following on from their recent success of winning best self-help podcast at the UK Podcasters Awards ceremony 2015, Kathryn and Julian were invited to the BBC to take part as guests on Lesley Dolphin’s afternoon radio show. ‘On the Sofa with Lesley Dolphin’ – is a BBC Radio Suffolk feature interviewing local people about their lives and successes. So with the tables turned and the spotlight glare firmly on Kathryn and Julian, we sat down for a warm-hearted discussion and interview about...

“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.”  Dalai Lama XIV According to neuroscientist and psychologists, one of the significant aspects happiness is it can be a learned response because the characteristics of happiness exhibit plasticity. Yes, this means we can take specific actions to make us feel happier. And when we when we practice or repeat them they build up into a habit. You know this from your own family, friends and colleagues that some people seem...

“The most important thing is to enjoy your life—to be happy—it's all that matters.”  Audrey Hepburn The amazing thing about happiness is it’s a skill we can learn and practice and make into a habit.    As mentioned in What is happiness and the Neuroscience Behind It, four of the key characteristics of happiness exhibit plasticity, which means we can do something about it, we can grow and develop more happiness. "Happiness is not an accident. Nor is it something you wish for. Happiness...

‘Being happy is something you have to learn. I often surprise myself by saying “Wow, this is it. I guess I’m happy. I got a home I love. A career that I love. I’m even feeling more and more at peace with myself.” If there’s something else to happiness, let me know. I’m ambitious for that, too.’ Harrison Ford How happy are you?  This begs the question – how do you know how happy you are? Is it something you can measure? Is it something we should measure – and at what level can we measure it...

Here at BrilliantLivingHQ.com we love thinking and talking about how our thoughts impact our lives.  How what we think makes a difference to what we do, which is where the concept of mind management comes in. When we realise we don’t have to be defined and confined by the way we think, because they’re just thoughts and we are more than our thoughts, we can do something about it to make changes and get the life we want. We call it managing your mind. Our guest for today, Rob Cubbon, calls it...

When have you been at your happiest?  Do our happiness levels change throughout our life? Does happiness depend on your age? This week we’re talking about the link between happiness and age and thinking about how happy we are at different stages of our live, does it change and what does it mean for us. When have you been at your happiest? When you look back are there times when you felt really happy? Was it your childhood, first love, student days, staring out with your career or family,...

We all want to be happy, but what is happiness; is it a skill we can learn, and what does neuroscience have to say about it? What is happiness? What do you want in life? To be happy? That’s what most of us want -but what is happiness and how do we get it? The dictionary definition of happiness is “feeling or showing pleasure or contentment” But surely there’s more to happiness than a fleeting feeling. Whilst happiness is relative as it means different things to different people...

We all feel overwhelmed at times. Seemingly insignificant circumstances can tip us over the edge into feelings of overwhelm that on other occasions wouldn’t bother us at all. What one person finds overwhelming, others cope with comfortably or even thrive on. People have different thresholds and causes, but we all experience it and it’s not nice or good for us. So what is it, what causes it and how can we go about dealing with overwhelm? Quote "The challenge in my life really is keeping...

 “Act the way you'd like to be and soon you'll be the way you'd like to act.” ~ Bob Dylan 1 year of podcasting It’s celebrations all round at Brilliant Living HQ as we celebrate the first birthday of our offspring – the Changeability Podcast. Podcast Award Finalists Plus a massive bonus celebration. We’re thrilled the Changeability Podcast has been nominated as a finalist for the UK Top Self–Help Podcast Award.  How wonderful is that A huge heartfelt thank you all you marvellous people...

‘The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.’ Oprah Winfrey Introduction We all like celebrating don’t we?  But do we do enough of it. There’s lots of reasons to celebrate – sporting victories, birthdays, weddings, new job, and ways of doing it – party, slap-up meal, presents – and so the list could go on and on. Important and great as all of those are, that’s not the sort of celebration we’re talking about here. Because we’re interested in why and...

“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” Thus wrote Aristotle and whether you agree with his ancient Greek wisdom or not, honest self-reflection and review is a powerful and underused tool for success and change. Yes it’s hard, yes it’s scary, yes it might seem like a bit of pain – but evaluating your progress might just be the difference between learning from your experience and repeating your mistakes. How do you know what you’re doing is effective unless you measure and...