In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. Bat Sheva Marcus (again!) to talk about sex and how to have a thriving sex life. We outline how little people know about what contributes to positive libido and desire (so they don’t know what they were doing right) and then have NO IDEA what is getting in the way when their desire or drive changes. This feeling of a lack of control leaves people feeling powerless and like the solution lives outside of themselves.   This episode is for you if you are curious about How to learn the difference between arousal and desire.  How to use your erotic brain, even if you’ve been married for 25 years.  Why crumbs on the counter and full dishwasher ruin your libido in your 50s, and not your 20s.  How to think about the complexity of libido and sex, with SIMPLE solutions.  If you want to know if we prefer Speed Keanu Reeves or The Matrix Keanu Reeves ;)  Bat Sheva explains the factors that give you ‘points’ (fantasy, connection and hormone levels) and ‘take points’ away (some medications, fatigue, pain and more).  This episode is a great way to start to explore this part of your health and get some ideas for how to change.  Here’s more about our guest, and how you can grab her book, Satisfaction Guaranteed: How to have the sex you’ve always wanted.  Dr. Bat Sheva Marcus, a certified sex therapist, is the author of Satisfaction Guaranteed: How To Have the Sex You’ve Always Wanted. She has spent her life dedicated to bridging the gap between the medical and the psychological in women’s sexual health.  For nearly 25 years she served as the clinical director of one of the largest sexual health centers in the US. Dr. Marcus earned a master’s in public health as well as a Ph.D. in Human Sexuality at the Institute for the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality as well as a master’s degree in social work from Columbia University.