If you are human, you probably engaged in escalating a conflict by being defensive. In this episode, relationship expert Idit Sharoni shares what is defensiveness, how it looks inside a conversation, what it does, and how to avoid it. You'll get tools and ideas on what you can do when you feel attacked by your partner. By the end of this episode you'll know to better react and diffuse the conflict.  Links mentioned in this Episode: Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse Video - The Gottman Institute To send us questions you'd like answered in a future podcast: Please write your question in one paragraph (no more than 5 sentences) in the following format and email [email protected]  Type of relationship (marriage, dating, etc.) Length of relationship Your story + your question to Idit Sharoni  Remember, you will absolutely remain anonymous  For more information about the podcast and Idit Sharoni visit: www.iditsharoni.com