Episodes
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – why are men afraid to embrace beauty? If you walk away with one thing from this episode, know that if beating that face makes you happy, do it! We welcome Sir John to our Surface Level Family. Sir John, Creative Director and global make-up artist, brings a fun and insightful perspective to this conversation. As men, we tend to shy away from things that make us feel soft. This episode highlights ways in which we can be more confident in those parts of...
Published 01/25/23
ordan, Damon & Tony are curious – is categorizing certain stories as trauma porn fair? This week is centered around the hot topic of “trauma porn”. We have seen various stories that highlight the painful history of Black Americans. Sometimes it feels that these are the only stories Hollywood wants to share about us. We interrogate the line between art sharing truth versus what can sometimes feel like a one dimensional depiction of Black life. As a people, we represent an infinite expanse...
Published 01/18/23
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – how does the approval of others lead us to hide parts ourselves? Today’s episode explores the idea of hiding parts of who we are to gain acceptance in various spaces. We welcome Elegance Bratton to our Surface Level Family. Elegance, the director of the critically acclaimed film The Inspection, speaks on his journey from Queer Marine to creative and how his identity colored relationships with people from his mother to superiors in the service. The title...
Published 01/11/23
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – how can establishing healthier relationships with alcohol? We are all guilty of the proclamation “I’m never drinking again” after a rough night on the bottle. Maybe that was driven by a desire for a good time or from a need to escape darker emotions. We explore those dueling motives in this episode. From CDC guidelines on recommended drinking, to personal stories on when we decided our relationship with alcohol this episode has it all. Start the new year...
Published 01/04/23
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – how does self-hate create toxicity among Black, Queer men? Our show often highlights external factors that stifle our community, but this week is focused on self-reflection. Growing up as Black, Queer men we develop many defense mechanisms that manifest as self-hate. This hate is often reflected in the othering of people in our community whose experiences are different than our own. Part of the advancement of Black, Queer people is the embrace of all...
Published 12/28/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – are the benefits of abiding by respectability politics worth the cultural sacrifice? Today’s episode gets into heated territory at times as we debate the benefits, or lack thereof, for following the rules of respectability politics. We welcome Kalen Allen to our Surface Level Family. Kalen, actor and media personality, adds a fresh perspective to our conversation through his rise to fame on the Ellen DeGeneres show. This is not an episode where we all...
Published 12/21/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – has our fear of judgment stifled our sexual liberation? Safe spaces are important for Black Queer people and that idea extending to sexual environments is no different. We have some fun exploring our personal do’s and don’t in these situations and highlight how we as a community contribute to each other’s liberation or shame regarding sex. We know a lot but we don’t know it all, so join the conversation on social and let us know your thoughts.
Published 12/14/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – what can we do to make Black Queer stories more visible? In this season opener, we highlight the cultural moments that have made us feel most seen, we interrogate the internal and external factors limiting further visibility for our community, and we discuss our hopes for further advancement of the Black Gay agenda. We welcome Emil Wilbekin to our Surface Level Family. Emil, the multi-hyphenated Founder of Native Son, whose mission is to harness the...
Published 12/07/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – are you ready to go beyond the surface level with us? The finale to our fifth season further highlights our expanded commitment to community. We kick off by welcoming Steve Cruz, Strategic Giving Manager for the Ali Forney Center and Maddox Guerilla, an Ali Forney Center alum, to our Surface Level family. We were proud to raise money for AFC this season, an organization committed to protecting LGBTQIA+ youths from homelessness and empowering them to live...
Published 09/07/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – what did we learn when traversing the toughest moments in our friendship? This week’s episode is quite introspective and discusses the evolution of our views on friendship in recent years. We play a game that gives our response to messy friendship scenarios, then discuss the experience of growing apart from friends, the rocky road we have traversed as friends in recent years, and how we are actively working to be better friends to those around us. This...
Published 08/31/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – how can healthcare information best be communicated to Black Queer folx? This week’s episode takes a relevant look at healthcare discussions that started during COVID are now being renewed with onset of Monkeypox. We start as always with a bit of silliness in an animal themed game of ridiculous choices, then dissect our long term or evolving trust of the medical system, debate if the response to Monkeypox by Queer people is reflective of a lesson...
Published 08/24/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – how is the Black German experience different from that of Black Americans? This week’s episode is a special glimpse into our lives as friends sharing highlights from our experience at Berlin Pride. During the episode we play a game of Bop or Flop with various experiences we had on the trip, dissect the key differences we see between pride in New York vs our experience in Berlin, and discuss our tips for staying camera ready even if we partied all...
Published 08/17/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – how can we foster non-sexual male intimacy? This week, we explore the idea of intimacy between men both Straight and Queer. We play a game rating potential partners based on fun dating scenarios, then discuss how the stigma around sexuality has impacted our relationships with Straight men, if sex and intimacy can healthily exist with non-partners, and how we are presently expressing non-sexual intimacy in our relationships with other men. We welcome...
Published 08/03/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – how have our experiences with grief shaped how we want to be remembered? This episode starts with a fun game titled “giving up the ghost,” then delves into a conversation that is equal parts serious and fun. We dissect our individual experiences with grief, any anxiety we have surrounding it, our hopes for who will take care of us in our golden years, and close by sharing nontraditional ways we would like to have our lives celebrated. We are continuing...
Published 07/27/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – how is consent defined and exercised in our sex lives? This week, the idea of consent is reflected upon both personally and for its larger implications on society specific, to Black Queer men. We delve into the idea of blurred consent and the need for an explicit “yes” at all stages of sexual intercourse. We then turn the lens on the broader community to discuss cases of sexual trauma and abuse towards Black Queer men and the lackluster response from...
Published 07/20/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – how can Black parents better support their Queer children? This week we reflect on our experiences growing up in Black households - the good, the bad, and the downright ugly. We kick off with a game deciding if we need to “get the belt” to deal with rebellious children. Then launch into a discussion that focuses on past experiences but also forward-looking advice regarding tools that we wished our parents had when raising us. We welcome Dr. Lulu to our...
Published 07/13/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – do storylines in porn perpetuate harmful stereotypes of Black Queer men? This episode starts with a fun game where each host discovers the type of “deviant” they are through a series of questions regarding our kinks or lack thereof. We then delve into a conversation regarding our introduction to and relationship with pornography, and debate both the harmful and healing aspects of the inclusion of Black Queer men in porn. Like most work environments...
Published 07/06/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – how does media visibility affect how we see ourselves? This week’s episode is an absolute treat. We dissect the value of visibility within media and how it affects the way we view ourselves in real life. This week we are all living in Nicco’s world and the host of Surface Level are along for the ride. We welcome actor, Nicco Annan to our Surface Level Family. Nicco plays the beloved non-binary character, Uncle Clifford, on the hit show P-Valley. We...
Published 06/29/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – is a preference for masculinity inherently femmephobic? We kick off with a game imagining a world if we were girls, then launch into a discussion that centers around various facets of femininity as it relates to Queer cis men. We discuss our relationship with femininity, our opinions on “femme tops”, and what we are doing to make the world more accepting towards femininity in men. This is a fun take on a serious conversation that we are happy to bring...
Published 06/22/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – what can the current political system do to better protect Black Queer people? We are excited to welcome you back with a brief update on our time off between seasons. We then launch into a fun gay reimagining of the government for and by Black people. Our discussion is then centered around how the current political landscape is causing physical, mental, and emotional harm towards Black Queer people. This week we welcome Executive Director and...
Published 06/15/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – are you ready to go beyond the surface level with us? The finale to our fourth season features the theme of community. We kick off by welcoming LaQuann Dawson, Creative Director of MOBI, to our Surface Level family. We discuss his experience with the organization and the parallel missions of creative space and a platform for Black Queer folx. We then move into a game themed on the standout moments from this season. We wrap up with one of our most fun...
Published 02/23/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – is the art of shade helpful or harmful in our communities? We play a game deciding which common statements are shade vs “no shade”, discuss the history of “the dozens” and shade in Black communities, litigate if throwing shade for sport is based in insecurities, and discuss ways in which positive defense mechanisms we’ve developed help combat a world that views us as less than. Black communities often live by the phrase “laugh at our pain”. This...
Published 02/16/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – what do Black Queer stories look like when we write them ourselves? We play a literature-themed game, discuss our favorite Black Queer reads, discuss stories that we would write ourselves, then delve into a conversation around how Black Queer culture has informed the writing of our guest. This week we welcome New York Times bestselling author Michael Arceneaux to our Surface Level Family. Michael’s fun writing style takes a unique look at millennial...
Published 02/09/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – how have HBCUs evolved to fit the needs of Queer students? We play a game that reminds us of our time at Howard, discuss the history and evolution of Queer communities at HBCUs with two educators, then end with speaking to current students and recent graduates about the hope they wish to see for future generations and the work that is still to come. This week we welcome educators Dr. Steven Mobley (Howard) & Dr. Kirstin Byrd (Hampton &...
Published 02/02/22
Jordan, Damon & Tony are curious – how have you worked to heal from failed romantic relationships? We play a game titled, “Are You That Somebody”, detailing our own red flags when romantically involved. We then enter a convo with many highs and lows around how we have dealt with the ending of relationships. We further discuss the lingering feelings and how we worked through those, then laugh a lot about on how social media comes into play and awkward run ins with former partners. A...
Published 01/26/22