Episodes
This is a bittersweet episode, because – well – after 72 episodes over 4.5 years and with 30,000 listens in almost 200 countries, this is the final episode of The Lonely Diplomat podcast. But don’t despair! The podcast, the blog and the products and services for you and all those who live the diplomatic life will still be available to support you. My team and I have started something wonderful called HUMANS:Connecting, and we’d like to invite you to be a part of it. Website:...
Published 02/16/24
Published 02/16/24
What do you do when you’re experiencing one of life’s challenges? Do you acknowledge it and work through it or do you just push through? When it comes to loneliness, just pushing through comes at a terrible cost and you’re paying it blindly. Let’s talk about the pitfalls of your all-too-common strategy in this final episode of this season of The Lonely Diplomat podcast. Website: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com Get my help through your loneliness:...
Published 09/01/23
If it’s not already clear: I’m Phil. I’m gay and I get lonely. I come out as gay all the time. I also come out as lonely all the time. Coming out as lonely is tough. It’s often far easier for me to come out as gay than it is to come out as lonely. Let’s talk about coming out as lonely as the only way to break loneliness’ hold on your thoughts and behaviours. Website: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com Get my help through your loneliness: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com/services Buy me...
Published 09/01/23
This sounds a bit weird, but the connection you need and deserve: the soul-nourishing, toe-curling connection you need and deserve is waiting for you. All you need to do is to accept your loneliness and learn from it. Let’s talk about how you can do that. Website: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com Get my help through your loneliness: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com/services Buy me a coffee to say thanks for the episode: https://bit.ly/3nDMrZm Join the mailing list:...
Published 09/01/23
Stop competing against other people’s loneliness. Or, in other words, stop comparing your loneliness to anyone else’s. All you’re doing is manufacturing evidence that the loneliness you’re experiencing isn’t THAT bad and you can go on figuring it out by yourself. My friend: this episode can change your life. Website: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com Get my help through your loneliness: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com/services Buy me a coffee to say thanks for the episode:...
Published 09/01/23
The thoughts and feelings of loneliness can make you feel like you’re a broken human. But I know this to be true: loneliness doesn’t make you a broken, failed human. It makes you gloriously human. Let’s talk about that in this short episode that’s designed to give your mind, your heart and your soul a quick connection boost as you – a human who’s a diplomat or lives the diplomatic life – go about your day. Website: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com Get my help through your loneliness:...
Published 08/25/23
We’re exploring a tough topic in this episode: we’re exploring that awful kind of loneliness we humans can get when we’re in an abusive relationship. In any relationship that’s abusive. At home, at work. Join me for episode 66 of The Lonely Diplomat podcast and let’s talk about the hidden abuse in diplomacy. Website: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com Get my help through your loneliness: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com/services Buy me a coffee to say thanks for the episode:...
Published 08/11/23
I’m very visual, so I often think of loneliness as a pool. There are many ways to enter the pool, but once you’re in, you’re in. How did you enter the loneliness pool? How did you find yourself experiencing loneliness? Let’s have a quick chat about that. Join me now for episode 65 of The Lonely Diplomat podcast and let’s talk about your loneliness as you live your diplomatic life. Website: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com Get my help through your loneliness:...
Published 07/28/23
Grown-ups, it’s time to listen. It’s time to listen to those smart, engaged and observant young people in our lives like 16-year-old Toby who also live the diplomatic life. Listen to what the young people are saying. Listen to what they’re not saying. Listen to what they’re trying to say without getting anyone in trouble. Listen to those who witness and live everything but have no voice. Simply listen. Join me and the wonderful Toby for episode 64 of The Lonely Diplomat podcast and...
Published 07/14/23
During your diplomatic life, you’ve likely encountered the demands of diplomacy on your relationships, be those relationships those with your family, your friends OR your significant others. Let’s talk about how these demands can feed your loneliness. Join me now for episode 64 of The Lonely Diplomat podcast and let’s talk about your loneliness as you live your diplomatic life. Website: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com Get my help through your loneliness:...
Published 06/30/23
You MUST speak your loneliness if you are to learn from it and move towards getting the connection you need. But, beware the loneliness overshare. We can be quick to share our loneliness story with anyone with whom we feel seen, heard or that we belong. They may not be ready for that. Join me now for episode 62 of The Lonely Diplomat podcast and let’s talk about your loneliness as you live your diplomatic life. Website: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com Get my help through your...
Published 06/16/23
I don’t know about your loneliness, but when I feel lonely, I often feel as if I’m the only person in the world who’s thinking these horrible thoughts and feeling these feelings. Of course, that’s crap. But do you experience these kinds of thoughts and feelings, too? Join me now for Episode 61 of The Lonely Diplomat podcast and let’s talk about loneliness in diplomacy. Website: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com Get my help through your loneliness:...
Published 06/02/23
Welcome to a new format for The Lonely Diplomat podcast: quick connection boosts of 10 minutes or less. In this first short episode we’re going to talk about my answer to a common question I receive: Why loneliness? Why me? Join me now for Episode 60 of The Lonely Diplomat podcast and let’s talk about loneliness in diplomacy. Website: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com Get my help through your loneliness: https://www.thelonelydiplomat.com/services Buy me a coffee to say thanks for the...
Published 05/19/23
Come and join me and my beautiful partner Jeff for a chat about him, me and us. Jeff and I recorded some magic in this episode. The conversation went in a direction that I hadn’t really intended it. But as is so often the case when conversations are real, open and honest, it went where it needed to go: we spoke on how loneliness has shown up in our lives and how it’s fuelled connection for each of us, how we came to live together, and how each of us approaches life individually and as part...
Published 05/05/23
Are you inadvertently feeding connection and starving loneliness? Let's check. It’s time to sharpen your pencil and set aside a few moments to do a couple of audits that will really help you feel better connected to yourself, to those most important to you and to your communities. I know that the word ‘audit’ can make even the most stoney-faced diplomat roll their eyes, groan and harrumph like a disappointed teenager. What you do with these words and the exercises within can give you...
Published 04/14/23
I’ve been feeling overwhelmed lately. I thought that I was hiding it well. I wasn’t. It took a kind and honest conversation to help me understand the impact the constant state of overwhelm has on me and those most important to me. We need to have a kind and honest conversation about how we – as a global diplomatic community – are almost always in a state of overwhelm as we work hard to meet all the demands we feel we have on us AND those we place on ourselves. Come and join me for a...
Published 03/17/23
To the humans of international diplomacy: Our kids are not OK. They’re reporting high levels of emotional abuse, emotional neglect, physical abuse and sexual abuse. We need to have a kind and honest conversation about how we – as a global diplomatic community – show up in support of our littlest and junior diplomats so they have the upbringing we all wish for them. Come and join me and Tanya Crossman from TCK Training for a real conversation about how our kids are not OK. Need to...
Published 02/17/23
Come and join me and Karina Lagarrigue for a conversation about how we can best support diplomatic mums. Karina is a Barcelona-based psychologist specializing in expat couples therapy and sex therapy. She’s also a PhD candidate in sensory processing sensitivity for expatriated mums. You must join us if you are a parent and want to help improve the support provided diplomatic parents and their children. Links to Karina’s work: Survey: https://bit.ly/3iPoVZB Email:...
Published 01/20/23
Come and join me for a real conversation about what it means to connect. Connection is a big deal. It’s the antidote to loneliness and you – as a human – need to feel connected. But how do you know if you’re doing it right? Listening to this episode of The Lonely Diplomat podcast is a great place to start. Need to get your diplomatic life back on track? You need your Diplomatic Life Plan. Get yours now through the link below. Links: Send me your question:...
Published 12/16/22
Come and join me for a real conversation about what it means to be at a rock bottom mentally, emotionally, physically and socially while living the diplomatic life in this episode of The Lonely Diplomat podcast. In this episode, I talk about: - While rock bottom is a messy place, it’s a source of hope. - Why you avoid seeking help until you’ve got no other alternative - How I’ve hit rock bottom many times (my loneliness, my sexuality and leaving my job) and how I move forward. It’s real,...
Published 11/18/22
Come and join me and Georgie Ryan for a cup of tea and a chat about being an accompanying significant other while living her diplomatic life in this episode of The Lonely Diplomat podcast. In this episode, we talk about - the impact her blog post and previous appearance on the podcast has had supporting the global diplomatic community. - Times when Georgie said that this is not how she wanted to live and courageously made changes in her diplomatic life; and - How she’s smelled William...
Published 10/21/22
Many aspects of this diplomatic life are amazing. And there are many that are, well, far from amazing. Always needing to be ready – to be ‘on’ – to respond to something in the right way at the right time. Everyone on a posting – posted officer and their families – always need to be vigilant and mindful of how their words and actions are perceived. It is exhausting. Let’s talk about that in this episode of The Lonely Diplomat podcast. Need to get your diplomatic life back on track? You...
Published 09/23/22
I’m back. It’s been a while, hasn’t it? There’s been a lot happening with me AND with The Lonely Diplomat. Let’s catch up. Need to get your diplomatic life back on track? You need your Diplomatic Life Plan. Get yours now through the link below. Links: Send me your question: [email protected] Website: www.thelonelydiplomat.com Blog: www.thelonelydiplomat.com/blog Get your Diplomatic Life Plan: www.thelonelydiplomat.com/mentoring Watch on YouTube:...
Published 09/01/22
There’s something calming about observing protocols and heeding diplomatic traditions in times of great disruption, uncertainty and stress. But sometimes, things need to be shaken up and modernised so they meet today’s needs. When it comes to serving, supporting, challenging and inspiring diplomats and those who live the diplomatic life, the usual support services and structures may not be fit for their original purpose. This is a call to those who, like me, are all about supporting,...
Published 02/04/22