Candi lives with Muscular Dystrophy. She shares how it progressed and how it changed her physical capabilities over her lifetime, and what it’s like to date and to have sex with a visible disability. She also opens up about loving rough sex and BDSM, despite what others might perceive as fragility.
Candi is a 27-year-old, cisgender woman. She describes herself as heterosexual, monogamous, single, tall, and thin.
This is revisiting an episode that was first broadcast in November 2020.
Leah shares the health issues she's been dealing with, and why they have brought up extensive flashbacks to her mother's cancer journey.
Then we revisit a conversation with Lisa, first broadcast in December 2019.
Lisa is a 40-year-old cis-gender woman who describes herself as white, currently in a relationship that is heterosexual, monogamous, and long-distance. She has also long been attracted to women and is considering the likelihood that she is bisexual.
"Fall in love with your sex...
Sometimes desires arise in the imagination long before you have a chance to try them in real life. Michelle knew she wanted multiple partners and group arrangements—with people of all genders—even while surfing through old-school hetero-normative porn on the family computer. Now she’s publicly polyamorous and fully out on Instagram, defining her terms by living them.
Michelle is a 29-year-old cisgender woman. She describes herself as Asian, bisexual, polyamorous and partnered. She...
Sex is complicated when you grow up Catholic and learn that kissing your best friend feels like heaven but will send you straight to hell. Sophia explored her feelings initially but then shut down once she got married. When the sheer physicality of menopause forced her to re-inhabit her body, she embraced a spiritual path towards sexual reawakening.
Sophia is a 56-year-old cisgender female. She describes herself as white, lesbian, and married. After a lifetime of monogamy, she recently came...
When you love being naked, feeling sexy, giving and receiving pleasure, and you're happily married, you may be…a porn star! Sinn Sage takes us into the real world of sex work, from her early days stripping at clubs and “bachelor” parties, to working as a pornstar-for-hire, through creating and selling her own custom porn in the age of SESTA-FOSTA and Pornhub.
Sinn Sage is a 39-year-old, cisgender female who says she has a little bit of gender fluidity but is still happy using she/her...
In today's episode, we dive into topics like why confident little girls turn into quiet, ashamed middle schoolers; how Tori's family tried to buck the stereotypes of Black fathers not being around by allowing her abuser to continue living with them; the moment she had to decide whether to save her abuser or let him die; and even exploring race play.
Tori is a 46-year-old cisgender female. She describes herself as Black, mostly straight, currently monogamous, and in a relationship. She grew...
Since beginning her transition to become a transgender woman recently, Kelly has discovered that she is interested in people of all genders. She discusses how hormone therapy has changed her body, her mind, and her orgasms.
Kelly is a 34-year-old transgender woman. She describes herself as white, bisexual, single, and currently exploring open relationships. She has no kids and describes her body as thick.
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Sometimes conventional needs have to be met through unconventional means. Heidi has a higher libido than her husband, but a lot of other things in the marriage work. Making a committed relationship work with her partner and best friend requires having another friend to provide more consistent and fulfilling sex. The first time she brought it up, it was a no from her primary partner. Later she was able to circle back based on their trust, goodwill, and clear communication.
Heidi is a...
A horny ex-Catholic joins us from the Netherlands to give us the low-down on how living in a liberal country but growing up in an oppressive family gave her all sorts of mixed-up and downright wrong messages. It’s something like a double-negative version of universes colliding to form new yeses. She’s now a mother of five, and currently balancing sex and motherhood and an unconventional family arrangement.
Carla is a 45-year-old cisgender woman who describes herself as Black, heteroflexible,...
Leah sits down with her good friend Danielle of the Marriage & Martinis podcast to talk about her own relationship.
The two discuss Leah's new adventure into pursuing an open relationship with her long-time partner.
How did they know it was the right time to explore non-monogamy? What is different about their relationship now that allows them to trust one another enough to pursue sexual experiences outside of their relationship? What are the boundaries for sexual encounters outside...
When a dancer goes from embodying the feminine ideal to challenging it, beauty and gender standards are thrown into beautiful disarray. Monica began shaving and bleaching her bountiful body hair when she was 8. Two years ago, she finally rebelled and launched the Wet Hairy Woman project. She continues to untangle her preconceived notions around sexual and gender orientation and is learning to overcome her trauma responses while celebrating her true nature at every level. In other words ......
The road to reclaiming consent is extra-long when it begins at age 3, and even more complicated by undiagnosed mental health disorders. For Deidre, a lifetime of sexual assault and a growing substance problem led to a rock bottom that included a BPD diagnosis. Today she's feeling healthy mentally and in a wonderful new relationship.
Deidre is a 31-year-old non-binary person who uses both she and they pronouns and doesn’t have a preference for either one. Deidre describes herself as white,...
What do you call a virgin who loves getting head? A comedian!
Kyndra Crump takes a deep dive into heteroflexibility and gets some re-education about why losing your virginity doesn’t have to hurt—especially if you already like the rest of the stuff. She also learns about swingers-club protocols when she opens up about her exhibitionist desires.
Kyndra is a 25-year-old cisgender woman. She describes herself as Black, monogamous with a curiosity about polyamory, single, and heteroflexible...
Is it true that sex will become less fun - or even painful 😬 - after menopause? Is there any way to stop the changes that happen to our bodies as we get older?
Today I have a special guest: MY OWN health care provider! She's passionate about women's health and I trust her completely.
My favorite part of this episode: Maya's theory on why women have so few f***s to give as they get into their 40s and 50s (hint: it has to do with their hormone levels).
You can find Maya at...
Sex is hard enough to figure out without also having to wrangle with your gender. Stevie was raised as a little girl, but that never quite fit. They've covered a lot of ground to find clarity. They’re now happily married, while still exploring what they actually like in their body and who they want to be in their relationship.
Stevie is 37 years old and identifies as non-binary or gender queer. They describe themselves as white, gay, monogamous, and married. Stevie grew up in Scotland and...
When culture tells you that women are sexy, but the church says same-sex attraction isn't allowed, you might try to screw yourself straight. Mia shares how she went from stealing kisses with girls thanks to alcohol-fueled courage while trying to prove to herself that she was straight, to building a lasting love with one of those kissed girls.
Mia is a 23-year-old cisgender female. She describes herself as white, monogamous, not straight, and engaged at the time of recording. Since then, she...
Growing up in a conservative church, some kids don't even know being gay is an option. Add that to an ill-kept family secret, and Olivia became scared to orgasm as an adult. She shares how she went from Googling “naked bodies” to discovering assault survivor resources, and why she’s now exploring polyamorous dating.
Olivia is a 24-year-old cisgender female. She describes herself as mixed race with both African and Middle Eastern heritage, and she’s gay with an asterisk. She grew up in an...
The most important move for a great sexual experience: having the talk.
STARS is an easy-to-remember acronym for conversations that lead to awesome consensual sex.
In this episode, Samara and Caleb have the STARS talk. They've been in a relationship for 10 months of serious dating, ready to move in together, and already having good sex. Even so, they uncover several things that surprise them and will help them up-level their sex life.
Samara is a 29-year-old cisgender female who describes...
It's been a tough week. With the decision in Dobbs v. Jackson Women's Health Organization, fully half of the American population has lost the ability to make health care choices for our own bodies.
We are now more regressive on reproductive health than countries like Mexico.
In this episode, we look at the grief many of us are feeling; the frustration of being a cis woman supporting our male partner's grief journey; and tactics to get help to people who need it most.
Full show notes:
While a stutter may seem like an impediment to clear communication, Mia says it helped her identify a perfect partner. She talks about how an early experience of being "the other woman" continues to affect her feelings about relationships. Then, she and Leah discuss how to navigate changing bodies, waning attraction, and mismatched libidos.
Mia is a 29-year-old cisgender female. She describes herself as white, straight, monogamous, and engaged to be married. She grew up in a non-practicing...
Purity ring, wedding ring ... cock ring?! After many conversations with people who have religious trauma around sexuality, it's a pleasure to finally welcome someone who grew up in conservative Christianity and has a healthy relationship with sex.
Hannah opens up about how she and her husband navigated abstinence while still building a relationship based on trust and pleasure, and how they continued to nurture both after pregnancy loss. We also talk about sex during pregnancy and in the...
People typically talk about an absence of sex as something gone wrong, followed by an array of advice to spice up, fix, rekindle, reboot, top down, bottoms up, laugh, cry, and eventually achieve perfect sex. But what if your life feels pretty perfect without it?
Kristen grew up in Purity Culture, so her lack of interest in dating was a plus as a teenager. But when she became an adult and still wasn't interested in dating, it became clear that something else was going on. Kristen eventually...
Talk about coming full circle: when your friends-with-benefits from age 12 comes back around to become your life partner and literally make your deepest taboo fantasies come true. Rachel shares how she started kissing in daycare, experimented sexually in her teens, tried marriage and polyamory, learning BDSM and psychedelically-enhanced role playing along the way.
Rachel is a 38-year-old, cisgender female who describes herself as white, pansexual, monogamish, and partnered. She describes her...
Rain Dove grew up with a birth certificate that listed gender as "F." For much of their life, they imagined that "F" stood for "Failure" to be properly "Female." Today Rain is a gender-bending model who walks runways for designers of both masculine- and feminine-coded clothing. Rain is also an activist working to make the world better for people of all genders, orientations, and more. Rain is currently assisting vulnerable people to escape Ukraine.
What if gender is not just about g******s,...