While for some people the holidays can be a time for joy, peace, and love, for many others it is a time of stress, grief, and overwhelm. This episode is for those who want more of the former and less or the latter. Whether you're going through a divorce or break-up, you or someone close to you is ill, you can't imagine the holidays without that special person who died, or if you're someone who has a strong people-pleasing part that sacrifices yourself for others, leaving you feeling depleted, and perhaps dejected, resentful, or angry in the end...then this episode is for you. We'll talk about how to take care of yourself during this episode. When you take care of yourself, you have increased capacity to connect with and help others. Your relationships become stronger and you feel more satisfied. If you like this episode, I hope you'll share it with friends, co-workers, and family. Thanks for being here! Sign up for Karin's FREE class, Compassionate Boundaries for a Peaceful Holiday (November 15 at 5:30pm PST): https://boundaries.drcalde.com Or you can send Karin an email to sign up for her class, putting "boundaries" in the subject line: [email protected] Karin's webisite: www.drcalde.com   TRANSCRIPT Intro: Karin: This is Love Is Us, Exploring Relationships and How We Connect. I'm your host, Karin Calde. I'll talk with people about how we can strengthen our relationships, explore who we are in those relationships, and experience a greater sense of love and connection with those around us, including ourselves. I have a PhD in clinical Psychology, practiced as a psychologist resident, and after diving into my own healing work, I went back to school and became a coach, helping individuals and couples with their relationships and personal growth. If you want to experience more love in your life and contribute to healing the disconnect so prevalent in our world today, you're in the right place. Welcome to Love Is Us.   Episode: Hello, everybody. It is November, and holiday season is upon us, no matter how you celebrate it, or if you even celebrate it. But this can be a really stressful time for people, and I really want to know, how would you like the upcoming holidays to go for you? If you're not intentional about it and you don't decide what you want, then they're going to happen as they will and probably much like past years, and maybe that's okay. But if you're typically worn out by the time that New Year's Day rolls around, you're disappointed or you're wondering why you don't feel rejuvenated.   Or, maybe you're having a hard time right now. You could be going through a divorce or a breakup. You might have lost someone close to you, or maybe you or someone in your family is in crisis right now. There are a lot of things that can impact our experience of holiday time, and we're surrounded by all these images on TV and social media of all these happy people. And it's easy to compare and then feel badly when you don't feel that joy.   I want to put you in the driver's seat of your life this holiday season. Instead of letting everyone else's actions determine how you feel and how you judge your holiday experiences, I want you to be in a position of choice and personal power. Because the truth is, when you're aware of your own needs and you stop depending on others to fill you up, you'll be in a much better position to connect with the people close to you and give, and you're just going to feel a lot happier. Like they say, you can't pour from an empty cup and there is nothing like the holidays to suck our cups dry.   I have five different areas I'm going to focus on today. But if that's too much, if that means you're likely to do nothing, then just pick one. Maybe it's the first one that grabs you and then focus on it. Okay, so we're going to dive right in.   Number one, identify what's really important to you this holiday season and let everything else go. Now, this isn't easy for those of us who h