Befriending yoruself is part of self-development work. It's about learning to like and love yourself through building self-trust, self-acceptance, developing intuition, communcating boundaries, and connecting with others. My guest, Rachel Astarte, talks with us about the benefits of becoming your own best friend, whether you're in midlife or at any point in your life. Rachel Astarte is an author, holistic psychotherapist, and transformational life coach. She is the author of "Celebrating Solitude: How to Develop and Honor Your Highest Self." She is also the host of the podcast, "Self Talk with Rachel Astarte." Learn more about Rachel: Website: http://rachelastartetherapy.com “Self Talk” Podcast: http://rachelastartetherapy.com/podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rachelastartetherapy Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/rachelastartetherapy LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rachelastarte/   Learn more about Karin: Website: https://drcalde.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theloveandconnectioncoach   TRANSCRIPT Intro: Karin: This is Love Is Us, Exploring Relationships and How We Connect. I'm your host, Karin Calde. I'll talk with people about how we can strengthen our relationships, explore who we are in those relationships, and experience a greater sense of love and connection with those around us, including ourselves. I have a PhD in clinical Psychology, practiced as a psychologist resident, and after diving into my own healing work, I went back to school and became a coach, helping individuals and couples with their relationships and personal growth. If you want to experience more love in your life and contribute to healing the disconnect so prevalent in our world today, you're in the right place. Welcome to Love Is Us.   [00:50] Karin: Hello, everybody. Today I'm talking with Rachel Astarte, and she is a holistic therapist out of New York. And we're going to be talking about self development. Now, I talk about self development a lot, and it's a really big part of what I do with clients. And today we're going to dive into what it really is. It's about figuring out who you really are, learning to connect with yourself. And when you do that, you become your own best friend (which is the of a program that Rachel actually runs). And when you do that, that in turn helps your relationships get stronger, too. But what does self development really mean and what does it entail? So that's what we're going to talk about. We're going to talk about self compassion, intuition, the self critic, and how they're all intertwined and so much more. And then toward the end, we move on to talking about women in midlife and the unique challenges that they face and how this all applies to them. There are so many gems here. So I'm glad you're here. If you like the episode, I hope you'll leave me a review and share it with others. All right, here we go. [02:04] Karin: Welcome, Rachel. [02:05] Rachel: Thank you so much for having me, Karen. It's great to be here. [02:09] Karin: So, first of all, tell me where you are in the world. [02:13] Rachel: I'm located just outside of New York City, about a half an hour outside of, yeah, New York proper. And, yeah, having a snowstorm. Well, it's just finished now, but it was very beautiful earlier. [02:29] Karin: And what keeps you there? [02:32] Rachel: Well, I love New York. I mean, I was actually born in Illinois, but I have no recollection of that because my parents moved when I was about six months old and my father got a teaching position in western New York and we stayed there. But when I was 14 years old, I took my first trip to Manhattan and I fell in love. So what ended up happening was after I graduated from university, I went to a state school, and I said, I want to move to New York, down into the city, and with a couple of forays elsewhere, I spent most of my life, my young adult life there, 22 years in New York City. And then in 2009, I moved outsi