Don’t be so afraid of getting stuck in wallowing, or victim-mode, that you stay even more stuck avoiding your feelings, or wounds. The world has trained many of us to avoid feeling our uncomfortable feelings. To think something has gone wrong if negative feelings are there for “too long.” As if there is some “right” or “wrong” way to do feelings. There is no right or wrong way to do feelings. We’re going to talk about real concepts that come up regularly with real clients, that are common...

When you know the real actual problem, you can address the real actual issue, which will allow you to create real, actual, lasting change. This is a sneak peek into Danny's new Free Video Training that he created for YOU. The Fearless Freedom From Pornography Training: How to Achieve Ultimate Victory Over Porn. Porn is not the actual problem in an unwanted porn habit. In the training, Danny goes through the 6 Real Actual Problems behind an unwanted porn habit. In this podcast episode,...

Hear how Mike Beatty 10x-ed his results compared to previous coaches/therapists/methods he had tried. Live interview with past client. Learn from what worked and didn't' work for Mike. How he created tremendous new success. START WITH THIS: Access Free Webinar Training (click here) Check out Danny's Instagram here: @dannypoelmancoaching Ready to work with Danny? Schedule a free consultation here: Work With Me Website: https://www.dannypoelman.com Danny Poelman is a certified life...

How to Release Worry & Achieve Goals More Powerfully (with an Exercise You Can Try while reading) Danny Poelman is a certified life coach and helps guys stop looking at pornography (and be happy about it) and make their real life so good that porn becomes irrelevant. He created this podcast to help those who are struggling with porn in their marriage and lives, and who know deep down there's something "more" for them if they just learn the skill of doing life porn free. Ready to work...

Discover practical mindset shifts to reduce pornography cravings and hear Michael's inspiring journey of breaking free from the habit for good. Whether you're struggling yourself or curious about the topic, this episode offers valuable insights and real-life client examples for lasting change. Tune in now to explore some empowering new mindset shifts and reclaim control over your impulses. Danny Poelman is a certified life coach and helps guys stop looking at pornography (and be happy...

If you failed recently in your effort to quit a porn habit, and  you’re telling yourself “Nothing I do will make a difference.”  “What I do won’t matter anyway.”  Then you need to listen to this podcast episode now. Danny Poelman is a certified life coach and helps guys stop looking at pornography (and be happy about it) and make their real life so good that porn becomes irrelevant. He created this podcast to help those who are struggling with porn in their marriage and lives, and who know...

So much of unwanted porn use has to do with escaping feelings. But which feelings? The difference between emotions and an actual stress response. Emotions vs. Physical Sensations Trauma vs Stress Response Healing/Processing From Trauma Happens The 4 F’s and How Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn Might Show Up For You 4 F’s Sometimes Helpful and Sometimes Not. Some of the less helpful ways stress responses show up. How to implement this information. How to Apply This Information to an unwanted Porn...

The following topics help to understand Why Your Brain Overdesires Pornography:-Motivational triad-Upper brain and lower brain-False pleasures vs. natural pleasuresWhy it’s important to use upper brain more skillfully for decisions around false pleasures (like pornography). 2. If you find yourself in a hurry with your goals to quit porn for good, it probably means 1 of 2 things. And is this really helping? 3. What I tell clients is that you don’t have a “porn problem” you have a thought...

If you stopped measuring your progress toward quitting porn for good based on when you last looked at porn, what would you measure instead? In today's episode, we discuss an example of a process that will help you to: -measure progress more accurately-learn more effectively-accelerate your progress (toward quitting a porn habit for good) Example from a real client session. How to go from shame, self-judgment, and self-punishment to self-compassion, curiosity, science. What questions to ask...

To experience more love, freedom, and empowerment, listen to this episode. If you are not into those things (love/freedom/empowerment), tune out now. This episode is not for you. Reminder: Steer clear of teachers who say they know better for you than you and who foster a continual dependence on them to know what’s best for you. We are talking real client examples today. What kind of self-talk actually helps you to reach your goals? What to do when people around you talk to you in unhelpful...

After listening to this episode, you will know better: -what is creating your current unwanted results-what it takes to create new/wanted results-the difference between the Automatic brain vs. the intellectual part of your brain, with a wild stallion analogy to make it clear-How to make sure your actually retraining your automatic brain and not just playing around in intellectual landTune in now and listen to full episode. Danny Poelman is a certified life coach and helps guys stop looking at...

This week's episode gets more specific about what it is that makes coaching work (to give you ideas what you can aim for even if you don't plan to hire a coach). Also, I'm betting more of you will want to hire a coach after hearing this. And we dive into a client example to demonstrate a more effective way of managing thoughts around masturbating to porn. Danny Poelman is a certified life coach and helps guys stop looking at pornography (and be happy about it) and make their real life so...

Sharing client success stories, including a client saying "Nothing works quite as well as this." And trying to make it more clear what "THIS" actually is. Some of Danny's philosophies on coaching that he uses because it just works. A yoga analogy to describe what it takes to go through a process that works. No matter how long you've had a porn habit, or how old you are, it is never too late to change your brain. Examples of this. People often overestimate what they can accomplish from a...

Real client example today. He thought the problem was that he just "really finds naked women attractive to look at." I asked him why. His response revealed 4 things that are the real issues. Once we address these 4 things, suddenly it's no longer a problem that he finds naked women attractive to look at. Quitting porn for good in a sex-positive way means we don't make it a problem that we are sexual beings, with sexual ideas/thoughts/feelings along the way. Instead, we reprogram our...

“One does not accumulate but eliminate. It is not daily increase but daily decrease. The height of cultivation always runs to simplicity.” -Bruce Lee “Perfection is not when there is no more to add, but no more to take away.” -Antoine de Sainte Exulpery, Pioneer of international postal flight, and author of Le Petit Prince (the little prince) “It is vain to do with more what can be done with less.” - William of Occam, originator of Occam’s razor A lot of the guys who come to me for help, are...

One of the lessons being that quitting a porn habit doesn’t have to be a big, hard, dark, serious thing. It can actually be fun, easy, light, humorous and completely doable. Tune into the How to Stop Looking at Porn podcast, with Danny Poelman, now to hear what other lessons were uncovered in this real life coaching session. Available wherever you get your podcasts. Danny Poelman is a certified life coach and helps guys stop looking at pornography (and be happy about it) and make their...

To make decisions powerfully (which is required to learn to quit porn for good), understanding these 4 parts of you that come up in decision-making will make all the difference. We are talking about these 4 parts: -Lower brain -Upper brain -Intuition (body) -Consciousness (you), awareness, power to exercise agency, or will When you understand the strengths and weaknesses of the parts of your brain, and learn to become aware of which parts are doing what, you will be enabled to make decisions...

Most people trying to quit a pornography habit for good do it by trying to avoid situations where they may have access to porn or be triggered to have urges to view it. It's time to understand why you should go toward those triggers (and access) for pornography. But only if you want to experience true freedom from this thing called "pornography." Tune in to this episode now to learn more. Danny Poelman is a certified life coach and helps guys stop looking at pornography (and be happy...

How do you approach a problem if you don’t believe there is a solution to it? How to recognize this mentality and the different forms it might show up in. Why Voldemort wanted the Horcruxes to remain a secret. Addressing the roots of the weed rather than just continually cutting the top off, only to find it growing back again and again. What happens when we really clear out these limiting beliefs and lean into believing a solution exists, and staying engaged with solving it. The solution...

What chains are we breaking today? The message “I’m bad.” Where does this come from?  Does it help to think this way? What helps create forward movement for you? In this episode, I’m talking about a message that, if you are like a lot of us, you have probably internalized (whether on purpose or not). And it just might be holding you back. A couple client examples of transformation/possibility. Some personal experiences of mine. An invitation for you to up level your life in this way, using...

Many of us have learned that more shame and self-punishment is what is required to create more power/motivation to change our habits. The truth is, less shame helps us to access even more power/motivation to change our habits. Why do we do this? How do we start picking up on our unconscious patterns? How do we make it easier to access more of your already-existing power to change your habits sustainably. In a way that lasts. Also, Danny vs. A.I.. Danny shares a secret about his new book...

I teach guys powerful, useable, practical, hands-on tools for managing their mind. Some of those tools include: -Thought Work-the Self-Coaching Model-Impulse ShiftingWhy is managing your mind important? Because thoughts create results. A lot of my clients first learn about these powerful mind-management tools because they have a porn habit that they want to quit, once and for all - FOR GOOD. So they practice with the mind-management tools and see that it helps (very effectively) with their...

Past client updates me, saying: “I am very satisfied with the progress I've made and continue to make. Urges are way down, short lived, and manageable.” Why can habitual behavior around porn feel so automatic? Your lower brain wants to avoid pain, seek pleasure, and be energy efficient. One of the ways your lower brain is energy efficient is by automating patterns that bring you a big dopamine hit (pleasure). It does this by skipping steps for you, and by repeating patterns it has already...

Common ways we have learned to interact with feelings that make it harder to quit a porn habit. The difference between avoiding, resisting, and reacting to emotions. What it means to allow and process a feeling (a skill required to sustainably quit pornography). How to start identifying some of your less helpful patterns around feeling your feelings/urges. Some questions to help you start identifying your learned patterns. Sample thoughts that are helpful to think while feeling your...