We sit down for Nathan's Drake's big screen debut with "Uncharted", an Indiana Jones style adventure with a hero about as mature looking as Young Indiana Jones.   CONTENT WARNING: betrayals, double crosses, defying gravity, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr.   Our theme music was composed by Jack Feerick, and performed and realized by Sam Feerick.   Click here to watch the Uncharted fan film, starring Nathan Fillion: UNCHARTED -...

We review the Resident Evil reboot from 2021, featuring far less Jovovitch than we'd like but way more of the actual source material than we ever expected. Strap in for a cheese-filled rollercoaster of creepy orphanages, flesh eating monsters, and unbelievably convenient explosive devices!    CONTENT WARNING: genetic mutation, human consumption, terrible management skills, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr.   Our theme music was...

Welcome to Season  4! Or, if you believe my confused narration, Season 3!***   This time we review Angry Birds, where a 2 minute mobile game has mutated into a 90 minute cartoon that's maybe for kids (but maybe not). Can this little piggy's house survive the weight of all that extra exposition, or are they right when they say less is more? Strap into your slingshot and find out!   CONTENT WARNING: carnivorous pigs, unsanitary drinking conditions, exploding fetuses, mild...

We close out our recent batch of video game related films with an 80's classic: The Running Man. Let's consult the video game check list...   An ex-soldier for our protagonist, framed for crimes he didn't commit? A deadly contest that risks the player's life in exchange for prizes if they win? A group of killer bosses with gimmicky powers to hunt our hero? A trio of weaker characters with bad pathfinding scripts that need to be escorted through the area?   If you can't see how this is...

Are video games the catalyst for World War III? We review "War Games", where a young Ferris Bueller showcases the most believable hacking skills in any Hollywood movie to outwit the most unbelievable portrayal of NORAD in any Hollywood movie. Real winners don't share gum!   CONTENT WARNING: Global Thermonuclear War, dumb teenagers, dumber government agents, unorthodox corncob buttering, unplanned stunt crashing, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and...

A stranger rolls into town, and he's come to Willy's Wonderland to clean house...   Nicolas Cage stars as "The Janitor", mercilessly and methodically hunting down Willy and his friends in a night of survival horror. It's a Final Girl picture like you've never seen before!   CONTENT WARNING: possessed animatronics, satanic rituals, dumb horny teens, sensual pinball, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr.   Our theme music was composed by...

50 episodes and we're still here? We've come back so many times, it defies the Konami code!   To celebrate, we're going back to the well (or tomb?) of Lara Croft, and watching the 2001 original with Angelina Jolie. Are star power and shower scenes more important than fight choreography or a coherent narrative? Paramount Pictures definitely thought so!   CONTENT WARNING: killer robots, The Illuminati, big guns (pistols), BIG GUNS (boobs), sex face, mild language.   Featuring the...

First he was stuck inside Pikachu. Now he's stuck inside Grand Theft Auto. Is the secret to a good time just getting Ryan Reynolds inside of you? Join us for "Free Guy", a digital hero's journey that proves robots are way better at being good people than actual people are.    CONTENT WARNING: intellectual property theft, existential crisis, robosexuality, a very special sock, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr.   Our theme music...

We're back with another bonus round of video game related films!   Join us as we travel to the apocalyptic future of 1997 to review "Turbo Kid", where water is scarce and BMX bikes are plentiful. Will our off-brand Mega Man save the future and repair his girlfriend's broken hearts?    CONTENT WARNING: torture, execution, killer robots, extreme arm wrestling, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr, with special guest Chris...

MERRY CHRISTMAS, ONE AND ALL!   We all must have been good little boys and girls, because we have a special treat this year. We asked for it, we searched for it, we prayed for it, and now it's here under the tree. It's a feature length film about video games that’s ALSO a Christmas film. Truly, a video game movie miracle!   We review "8 Bit Christmas", where Neil Patrick Harris uses a touching, 80s tinted story about the true meaning of Christmas to dodge buying his teen daughter a...

Look, up in the sky! It's a bird... It's a plane... It's a Kryptonian party pooper with a fire in his eyes that'll ruin your whole democracy!   We review the animated film Injustice, where DC asks the question, "What would Superman do for a follow up, after the domestic abuse of his pregnant wife?" Yes, you read that right.   CONTENT WARNING: hallucinations, revenge, tyranny, mass slaughter, forgotten speedsters, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne...

We review Far Cry, where a B&B boat captain is lured to a remote island by a beautiful reporter pursuing a tragic story, but he's only interested in getting off the island... or just plain getting off.   CONTENT WARNING: genetic experimentation, choking, shared body heat, inappropriate wetting of a napkin, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr.   Our theme music was composed by Jack Feerick, and performed and realized by Sam Feerick

Happy Halloween, and danger: SPOILERS WITHIN!   We review Werewolves Within, where a nice guy tries to start fresh in a small town, but his dream girl only wants him for his body. Also, there might be a werewolf eating people, but who's to say?   CONTENT WARNING: murder, deception, lycanthropy, firearms, phallic fuel facsimiles, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr.   Our theme music was composed by Jack Feerick, and performed...

We review Dead Space: Downfall, where a crack security team protecting the mining spaceship ISHIMURA heroically feed themselves to a swarm of space demons, one by one, so that their defenseless crew can die anyway. Great work, team!     CONTENT WARNING: religious persecution (just like Wing Commander!), insanity, dismemberment, reanimation of the dead, questionable sedation techniques, mild language... mutiny?   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick...

We review Wing Commander, a distant future where military orders are more like suggestions and no one fears death because they never existed in the first place. Also, CATS... IN... SPAAAACE!    CONTENT WARNING: galactic war, insubordination, religious persecution, the mental breakdown of one of our podcasters, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr.   Our theme music was composed by Jack Feerick, and performed and realized by Sam...

We review "Bayonetta: Bloody Fate", an anime boss-rush where witches are saviours, angels are demons, and journalists are perverts with an amazing sense of smell. Confused yet? So are we, but strap in anyway for non-stop-climax action!    CONTENT WARNING: dark magic, heresy, child abandonment, sexually suggestive lip licking, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr.   Our theme music was composed by Jack Feerick, and performed and...

We review Dante's Inferno, where no one seems to deserve all Nine Circles more than our titular "hero". Seriously, to Hell with this guy...   CONTENT WARNING: despicable protagonists, mass murder, religious war crimes, damning your beloved's immortal soul so you can do some heathen raping, strong language (seriously, we didn't bleep anything out this time).   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr.   Our theme music was composed by Jack Feerick, and...

We review Monster Hunter, where Milla Jovovich proves she's the ultimate heroine by slaying massive creatures from another world while simultaneously carrying an entire film production on her shoulders.    CONTENT WARNING: giant monsters, forcible confinement, really big spiders, devouring of expendable side characters, unfinished narratives, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr.   Our theme music was composed by Jack Feerick, and...

We review the newest Mortal Kombat, a gorgeous and moving short film about the origin of Scorpion and Sub Zero's blood feud. If only this was a full film... oh, wait, there's more? AMAZING! But who's this new guy? And where did Scorpion go? Uh-oh...   CONTENT WARNING:  blood, bait and switch, additional blood and gore, useless protagonists, bloody fights to the death, dangerous Australians, so much blood everywhere, plot holes, enough blood to wash away all of the plot holes, mild...

ROUND 3, FIGHT!   We review Mortal Kombat, where our heroes get stuck finishing their brother's chores, fight an 8 foot tall puppet to avenge a pair of sunglasses, and prove just tough enough to get subdued by some light hair pulling. Prepare yourself!   If you want to see more about the legitimately impressive puppetry that brought Prince Goro to life, here's a link:   MORTAL KOMBAT (1995) | The Making of Goro Featurette   CONTENT WARNING:  insensitive text messages, fights...

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!   We review "Bloodsport", the JCVD kickfest that spawned the MK series like illegitimate video game offspring. US Army Captain Frank Dux enters the Kumite, a secret full-contact fighting tournament, to honour the legacy of his Shidoshi. Without this film, the fighting game genre wouldn't be the same, so it's time to pay tribute. Sumos, split punches, and spin kicks galore. Hop aboard, Kumite express leaves in 5 minutes!   CONTENT WARNING: tournament fighting,...

We review "The Wizard", the 90 minute NES commercial with two separate competitions to cheer over: who will win Videogame Armageddon, and who has the saddest backstory? Starring Fred Savage and guest starring Super Mario Bros 3 for the NES.   CONTENT WARNING: runaways, orphans, children drowning, PTSD, bounty hunters, alleged child molestation, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr, with special guest Chris Niejadlik.   Our theme...

We review "GAMER", showcasing a future where online gaming now uses mind controlling nanites to swap out digital avatars for real life people, and where our badass hero is arguably only alive because a rich white kid owns him and tells him what to do.    CONTENT WARNING: murder, rape, mind control, alcohol poisoning, unfortunate gamer tags, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr.   Our theme music was composed by Jack Feerick, and...

We review "Ready Player One", a dystopian future where everyone can finally afford their own VR suit but spend their lives slaving away for that Dream Life Celebration. Based on the book about our 80s nostalgia, and directed by the creator of that same 80s nostalgia.    CONTENT WARNING: murder, terrorism, slavery, consumerism, the feels, mild language.   Featuring the voices of Marc Athanas, Wayne Bressette, and Nick Mohr.   Our theme music was composed by Jack Feerick, and performed and...

We review Hardcore Henry, the action extravaganza that asks us to literally see the world through the eyes of our protagonist as he murders every obstacle between him and the next cutscene... er, plot point.    BONUS CONTENT - here's a link to the original short that served as proof of concept for the film: Biting Elbows - 'Bad Motherf***er' Official Music Video (explicit lyrics)   CONTENT WARNING: amnesia, human experimentation, extremely stylish violence, unhealthy marriages, mild...